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‘Am I getting first choice here?’ I asked.
‘Of course,’ Kali said with a smile. I couldn’t work out if it was genuine.
‘I don’t know, maybe I should clean the dunnies first, break myself in gently.’
‘I’d say all jobs are equal but fishing is definitely a skill you’ll develop,’ Mary said next to me and I looked at Clara. She nodded enthusiastically.
I looked at Kali hopefully.
‘Okay, put me down for fishing please.’
After lunch a few of us moved to the front beach where a volleyball game began.
‘Some people like to sleep after lunch, but I love this when we all spontaneously play,’ Clara said grabbing my hand. ‘You’re on my team.’ She laughed excitedly.
As I looked across at our opponents, I saw Kali staring at me. She dropped her gaze and turned to her teammates: Mary and Precious. Clara and I also had Paula who glided about the camp like a goddess in her colourful kaftans. I hoped she was better at volleyball than I was. I had a sudden desire to win at this game for the sake of knowing I had beaten Kali. So far she had not shown me as much warmth as the other campmates and I was determined to prove my worth to her.
Kali played a hard game despite the searing midday sun. I guessed she was used to this heat, whereas I was still gettingused to it. Even after a month on the mainland. But somehow, between Clara, Paula and I, we managed to beat the other team. Mary and Precious came and shook our hands and I watched as Kali walked away back through the woodland, heading for camp. The other two didn’t show any response to Kali’s rapid departure, which I was sure was to do with me more than losing at a friendly game of volleyball. But why did she feel so threatened by me? I was here to learn to grow and surely she could see that she was the one who could help me?
Clara and I walked back to camp – sweatier, hotter versions of ourselves – and drank water from the tower that collected the rainwater. It was always warm but today I was so thirsty I gulped it down like it was ice cold. Then we sat down on the dusty track, a thick ray of sun blasting through the trees above, encouraging us to lie back and absorb the heat.
‘I can’t believe this is my life,’ I muttered, and Clara made a noise that sounded as though she were agreeing with me. But then she was quiet and when I looked over I could see her chest rising and falling slowly and realised she had fallen asleep. That was how easy it was just to be in the moment here. We were just like wild animals, snoozing in the midday sun wherever we lay.
For dinner that night we were invited to dress up a little for Precious’s birthday. I was moved to see how much effort had been put in. Someone had made paper galas, or maybe they had been left over from previous celebrations and brought out again. Either way, the colour added a vibrant feel to the evening.Someone had cooked a spicy stew, which required plenty of kava to knock it back with.
By the end of the night I was drunk and full and feeling joyous. Someone had even managed to make a chocolate cake. Sweet treats were a rarity here, I had heard, and after we sang happy birthday to Precious, everyone indulged, and the camp had never been so quiet for a few solitary minutes. Clara and I danced until we fell over, laughing like a pair of hyenas. As the camp began to break up and women began to go back to their huts, I noticed Kali over the other side of the camp. She walked over to me as Clara went to fill our water bottles.
‘What are your intentions?’ she asked bluntly, holding her water bottle in front of her as though she were protecting herself, although I knew I should be the one to feel threatened after the way I had seen her deal with the male intruder.
‘My intentions?’ I asked her back.
She nodded expectantly.
‘I don’t have any.’ I was aware I was slurring.
‘Come on,’ Kali said as though she were trying to get me on her side.
I shook my head. ‘I’m just here. Avril found me on the mainland. I’m here because I want to experience this life and—’
‘I don’t believe you.’ She lurched forward as she spoke through gritted teeth.
‘I don’t know why you wouldn’t believe me,’ I said almost laughing and then I saw Kali’s face change. Where she had been perturbed before she was angry with me now.
She looked over my shoulder, and I turned to see Clara returning with our bottles.
‘Maybe just think about moving on quickly,’ she said and turned and walked away.
Clara arrived next to me and handed me the full water bottle.
‘Okay?’ she asked, seeing my shocked face.
I felt a jab of sadness. I wanted to tell Clara what Kali had just said to me. But I didn’t want the night to end on a sour note for anyone else, even though it had for me.
‘Yeah, I’m okay,’ I said.
‘Well, I’m beat. Big day tomorrow,’ Clara said, referring to my first day fishing, something I had been looking forward to doing but knowing that Kali was going to be there as well, I wasn’t sure anymore.
The next morning I woke and Clara was not in her bed again. It was early and my body had already gotten used to the way the sky looked at certain times of the day, so I knew it was about 5a.m. We were fishing at 9a.m. I tried to lie and relax but all I could think about was where Clara was and why she wasn’t in her bed. Running at 5a.m. again? The sun was only just coming up. We had only gone to bed a few hours ago; perhaps it was her new role in camp that she hadn’t divulged that was taking her away so early.