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“No. I asked him to meet up so I could tell him the truth.”

When I look back at Erica, she’s a mix of somber and hopeful. “I’ve been stalking his socials for the better part of a year. He’s in a good place. Got a good job and his own place near some good schools.”

“So?”

“Mav is going to need somewhere to go when this thing inside me does me in.”

My heart drops to my feet. “I thought Mav was gonna stay here.”

“Ma doesn’t want to—”

“I want to,” my knee-jerk emotions blurt out. “I’ll take Mav. Leave him to me. I’ll take care of him. You know I can take care of him.”

“You can’t, Tommy.”

“Seriously? I’ve been Mav’s uncle for six years, and Paul’s been his dad for half a day, but you think he can do a betterjob than I can? ‘Cause he’s got a good job? I’ll get a better job, Erica. I’ll get my own place for us if Ma is who you’re worried about. I’ll be Mav’s guardian.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Why not?” My eyes water, like Erica’s death sentence has suddenly become Mav’s too. When she goes, he goes.

“You’re a kid, Tommy. I don’t care that you’re legally an adult. You’re a kid. I am not going to turn my baby brother into a parent at twenty because of my bad decisions and my bad fortune. You were never an option. You hear me? Never.”

“I get it,” I mutter through my tears.

“I’m sorry.” She hugs me, and it takes a moment before my body will hug her back.

“Is Paul gonna take him?” I ask against the top of her head.

“He wants a paternity test to make sure. Then, he obviously wants to meet Mav, but yeah, he said he’ll work on getting his place ready for when the time comes. Hopefully, not til summer, so Mav doesn’t have to switch schools mid-year.”

Trying to hold in my emotions for the sake of Erica’s, I muse, “Oakland isn’t that far. I could visit him a lot. Every weekend even.”

Pulling away enough to look up into my eyes, Erica asks, “Will you take him? When it’s time, will you take him to Oakland? If you take him, it’ll be easier for him.”

“Of course. I’ll do anything for him. I’ll do anything for you.”

Erica falls back into my arms, and I squeeze her as tight as her frailty allows.

When we finally make it home, I tell her to head inside while I linger on the porch. As soon as the front door shuts between us, I put my ass on the top step, pull out my phone and tap Rowan’s name into my contacts.

“Hey, baby boy,”he answers, voice a little groggy.“You miss me?”

“Hell yeah, I miss you,” I tell him. “Didn’t wake you, did I?”

“Nah, I’m just lying in bed watching game film. It’s late for you. Need me to read you a bedtime story? Heads up, though. It’s gonna be my paper on the history of broadcast media.”

Breathing a chuckle, I say, “I totally wanna hear it. You think we could talk for a little while first?”

“For sure. You can talk to me about anything.”

28

Tommy

Last time I was on a plane, I was twelve, going to the little league championship. Now, I’m crammed into a tin can with the rest of the Sac State team, getting ready to take off for round one of the NCAA College Cup in Utah. My nerves are ablaze, and it doesn’t help that every seat in this plane is full. Never thought of myself as claustrophobic, but something about not being able to move my legs is brewing a panic inside me. Doesn’t help either that I’m in a middle seat between some dude who smells like soup and Raisel, who’s been up near the cockpit, flirting with the flight attendant since we boarded.

“Hey, roomie.”