Page 79

I stared at the soup bowl for a second. “Thanks. Now let’s go back to not talking.”
“I’ll give you your space in a minute. I can’t let you sit in there any longer without you knowing one thing.”
“If it’s that you’re sorry, I’m not ready to hear that again.”
“No, it’s not that. Just listen for a second, Stella. Just for a second.”
“Fine.”
I heard him take a shaky breath. “I know you’re in there thinking that this is somehow your fault, and it’s not. It’s mine. I made the wrong choice, Stella. I know that now. Nick said things about me that I feared were true, and I let myself walk away from you and break your heart. But I never should have. I regretted it even then. I counted thedaysthat we were apart, suffering through each one of them like a fucking idiot when you were right there.”
Tears gathered in my eyes. “Y-you counted the days?”
“All 2,561 of them. At first, I didn’t know why I was doing it, but then it continued. No woman could hold a candle to you. I love your laugh, your sarcasm, and your hardheadedness. And because of my stupid choice, youspent those years questioning everything about yourself. You’re not a problem, Stella. You’re the solution. You’re everything, and I fucked it up. I know it. I should have chosen you all of those years ago because now I know that it’ll always beyou. And yeah, it may ruin things with Nick. And maybe I won’t even have you in the end because you could find someone else. But I’ll be here, always here. I’m yours. Forever yours.”
Footsteps walked away, leaving me with the sound of my pounding heart. I put the soup on the side table, completely uninterested in eating, and ran for the man who told me everything I needed to hear.
I’d never heard him sound like that, not to anyone. I didn’t think I was important to him.
But obviously, I was wrong.
“You can’t just say shit like that and walk away!” I snapped at the sight of his shoulders.
He turned. “You said you needed space.”
“But then you told me you counted thedayswe were apart. That changes everything.”
“Does it?” he asked slowly. “Because the way I see it?—”
“Nope, you’re done talking. It’s my turn now.” His eyes widened, but he didn’t say anything else. “Thank you. Now, first of all, fuck you for not choosing me. I’m great, and I deserve someone who sees it.”
“You do.” His voice was soft. “You deserve that and more.”
“And that leads me to my next point.” I sucked in alungful of air before continuing. “Thank you for being the only one who actually saw it.”
He blinked, obviously not expecting my second point. “What?”
“You reminded me that I’m worth something again. You’ve treated me like no other partner in my life has.”
“Guys should have lined up for you, Stella. You should have never felt like you did.”
“And I won’t again. This time, if I go all in with someone, it’ll be with someone who’s promised to choose me. Someone who’ll treat me as I should be.”
“That’s exactly what you should do. I know I’ll never be him?—”
“That’s the thing, though,” I said. “You could be—if you tried.”
“I don’t think I deserve?—”
“Stop saying you don’t deserve it. You’re the man who ran in the snow to be sure I wasn’t alone through this. You kept a fire going, relit the pilot light on the water heater, and stayed with me through thick and thin during this snowstorm. You’re a good person, Alden. Fuck anyone who says anything differently.”
He blinked as if he’d never heard that before. “But I hurt you.”
“Yeah, and it was over two thousand days ago.” I poked his chest. “I think you’ve made up for it. So, let’s try it again this time. And not let anyone else tell us what to do.”
His hand covered mine. “Are you sure?”
“Areyousure you can handle me?”