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“Ican’tsay it, Stella. I can’t let you down. Not again. Just like I couldn’t leave you here. I willalwaystake care of you.”
“Then why did you break my heart the first time? In atextof all things?”
“I couldn’t be with you.”
Her jaw dropped for all of one second, but then she exploded. “Why, Alden? Why do this? Is there some cosmic force telling you not to be around me or something?”
And there it was. The question I didn’t know how to answer.
“It’s complicated.”
“Why is it complicated?”
I opened my mouth to give her another diversion, butthere weren’t any I could give. I couldn’t lie to her, and I couldn’t hide to make this go away.
I should choose Nick. He was my best friend and he asked me not to do this with his sister. But I couldn’t continue being a coward. I couldn’t continue justifying breaking her heart to keep him comfortable.
“Because Nick told me not to date you seven years ago.”
Silence stretched out like a highway between us.
Finally, she spoke. “Hewhat?”
“He’s trying to protect you.”
She shook her head, jaw still hanging open. “From who?You?You’re not a threat.”
“Am I not? I’m a guy going after his sister. He’s bound to feel weird about it.”
“If we live in the eighteen hundreds, maybe. Last I checked it’s the twenty-first century.”
“I slept with you when you were eighteen.”
“And?”
“That’s predatory.”
“Pred—what?I came ontoyou.I was an adult!”
“And I wasmoreof an adult. Four years older than you.”
“You’re not making any sense. Even if you’re right, the only person who gets to have a say in who I date ismeand the person I choose to be with.No one else.”
“He cares about you.”
“Then he should trust me, and you for that matter.You’re his best friend, and last I checked, it comes with some amount of trust.”
“Trust that I broke.”
“Tell me how, Alden. Just by sleeping with me?”
“Yes.”
She scoffed. “Did you force me into it?”
“No.”
“Were you in a position of power over me?”