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CAMERONX: Then what’s with the username?

SKYLAR99: It’s my lucky number. Or used to be. It’s a long story.

CAMERONX: It’s not like we’re doing anything else on a school night.

SKYLAR99: Yeah, but I’m trying to forget about him.

CAMERONX: I see. Then you’ve been luckier in love than me. If that’s what it was.

Ricky swallowed. There was no doubt about it. What else but love could hurt so bad?

SKYLAR99: Are you out?

CAMERONX: In a way. I’m out to myself. You?

He thought about the way his mother insisted he could come to her with any questions he might have. “Whatever it is, we’ll find the answer together,” she had said once. That applied to everything in his life, not just the sexual stuff. So he hadn’t hesitated to tell her what had happened at camp. Not the intimate details, but how Jeremiah made him feel inside. His mother had listened without judgment before going to the living room bookshelf. She showed himTheKinsey Institute New Report on Sex, told him it would be a useful book at his age, and turned to the section on homosexuality. She showed him the statistics—proving that there were other people like him—and explained how such things were a roll of the genetic dice and nothing to be ashamed of. “There is no normal, honey. But thereisspecial. And that’s what you are.”

SKYLAR99: I’m out to my parents. That’s about it right now.I’m new to the area and don’t know anyone well enough to trust them.

Omar must suspect though. He hadn’t said much about it. After the second time they messed around, he had told Ricky, “That was fun, but we probably shouldn’t do it again.” Thatprobablyleft room for doubt, although not much, considering how sincere his infatuation with Silvia seemed.

CAMERONX: Where are you from?

SKYLAR99: I’d rather not say.

CAMERONX: That bad?

SKYLAR99: Heh. No. I’m just being careful.

CAMERONX: Which makes it sound like you’re not willing to meet tonight.

Ricky took a deep breath, expecting to grapple with temptation, but the truth was all too easy.

SKYLAR99: No. I’d rather take it slow.

CAMERONX: Good! I’ll stop testing you now.

SKYLAR99: Testing me?

CAMERONX: I’m tired of all the horndogs on here. Especially the Dr. Hotdog horndogs. I mean, I’m a horny guy, but I can take care of that myself. I’m looking for something more meaningful. If you’re not, I totally understand. But mostly, I just want to talk. Is that cool with you?

Ricky grinned, his fingers flying over the keyboard.

SKYLAR99: Yeah. That sounds perfect.

CHAPTER 11

September 19th, 1992

“This is either going to be the worst day of my life,” Omar said, pacing the waiting room of the clinic, “or the best. Ugh!”

Anthony grabbed his best friend’s shirt as he walked by and pulled, forcing him to sit. They were attracting stares. Especially now that the waiting room was getting crowded. They had woken up early this morning and pedaled like mad to get here so they would be the first in line. And they nearly were, the few people ahead of them already in exam rooms.

“Calm down,” Anthony said, lowering his voice. Not that it helped.

“I’m about to go on my first date ever with an insanely pretty girl! Could you imagine if I have to cancel because—” Omar finally became aware of the other patients and switched to a whisper. “—because I have AIDS?”

“If that’s what happens, she’ll be the last thing on your mind,” Anthony replied, uncomfortable with just how appealing he found the idea. He didn't want Omar to get sick, but if that’s what happened… His imagination conjured up a vision of a bedridden Omar, Anthony constantly at his side while tending to his every need. The sponge baths in particular, which was hot to visualize until his treacherous brain started filling in realistic details. Like the sores that would cover Omar’s emaciated body. Rather than have his friend suffer such a grisly fate, Anthony would rather cut off his own hands, which was also quite the visual. Maybe he needed help. “Do you think they have therapists here?” he murmured.