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“Of course,” Omar said with a sigh. “I let some dude suck me off. I know how gay that must seem. But I’m not. For real.”

“Yeah, me neither,” Anthony said bitterly as he felt all of his dreams come crashing down.

The blowjob had been a fluke and nothing more. Worse than that, Omar had no intention of doing it again. To be together, even once, would have meant the world to Anthony. Omar could have been his first. Instead, for reasons he still struggled to understand, someone else had been given that privilege.

“Why the hell did Ricky tell you?” Omar grumbled.

“He didn’t. I figured it out.”

“How?”

Anthony’s mouth went dry. “Oh shit.”

“What?” Omar said, taking a step toward him, but it was clear that he already knew the answer. “No way, man… Please tell me you didn’t!”

“She was talking about your sex life and it just came up,” he tried to explain.

Omar was already panicking. “Silvia knows?”

“Not about Ricky,” Anthony assured him. “I didn’t say anything about that.”

Omar’s relief was transparent. “Good!”

“Yeah,” Anthony replied with a guilty swallow. “But I was confused, because I thought you guys had gone further than you really have. Which we talked about.”

“That’s okay,” Omar said. “Let her think I got a blowjob from some other girl.”

Anthony pressed his lips together.

Omar noticed. “Fuck, dude! What exactly did you say?”

“Just that I thought you’d been with her already.”

Omar began walking back toward his house. “Was she pissed?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t stick around to find out.”

“Great. That’s just perfect.” Omar started jogging.

Anthony rushed to keep up. “What are you going to do?”

“Talk to her. Try to explain.”

“Are you going to tell her about Ricky?”

“No! Just… Stay out of it, okay? Don’t say anything else. To anyone.”

Anthony stopped running alongside him. Omar didn’t notice or didn’t care as he grew smaller. Anthony walked a few paces before the ache in his heart became too much. He wrapped the jacket tighter around his torso, like a bandage, but it only increased the pain. Because it felt like Omar hugging him. When he heard the gritty sound of skateboard wheels approaching, hope sparked within his chest and became a dancing flame. A gust of wind put it out again as Omar blew past him without saying a word. He only spared Anthony a distracted glance before speeding away to the record store. Which sucked, because Anthony had hoped that this would be the moment that finally brought them together. Instead, the distance between them had only grown.

— — —

Omar stepped off his skateboard while it was still rolling and let it coast until it hit the side of the brick building. He grabbed it absent-mindedly on his way into the record store and gritted his teeth in frustration when he saw a customer standing at the register. The chatty kind. He pretended to browse the merchandise while remaining where he could be seen. Silvia noticed him, her gaze shifting to a withering glare. Great!

He paced up and down the aisles for what felt like an eternity, but the customer still hadn’t budged. The man had a plastic bag with his purchases inside already. Why the hell wouldn’t he leave? Omar grabbed a random record and went to stand in line, clearing his throat a couple of times.

“Oh! Sorry about that,” the customer said, stepping aside… but he still didn’t leave.

“Do you have my special order?” Omar asked Silvia. “The guy I talked to earlier said it would be in back.”