Page 55
Story: Kiln Me Softly
Because it hurts to see you sad.‘Because we can’t have Cerberus going back to Manchester where nobody will look after him, can we?’
‘I mean, why are you always so nice to me? I’m never nice to you.’
The question took him aback. He pressed his tongue against the roof of his mouth, searching for an answer that wouldn’t give him and all his big, silly feelings for her away.
‘I wouldn’t say ‘never’. Just not often,’ he began softly. ‘Besides, maybe I don’t need you to be nice to me. Everybody else is only nice to me because they want something from me – or, usually, my dad. They use me because they think my name, my family, my money, can benefit them. I’d rather be around you. You don’t use me. I know exactly where I stand with you. You see through all the bullshit, Juni.’
Her throat bobbed, and it took him a moment to realise that the sudden warmth in his hands belonged to her. For once, he hadn’t been the one to reach out.
She looked down at their joined palms like she’d never seen them before, lids pink and lips chapped. Even like this, she was beautiful. Especially like this, because it was real. She wasn’t hiding.
Finally, she could see him for what he was, and it felt like the chains around him had finally split.
‘You’d really take care of Cerberus?’ she asked quietly. ‘You’d really do that for me?’
‘I think you know I’d probably do anything for you. Within reason, so don’t get any ideas.’
A laugh croaked from her, and the pressure in his chest eased. He’d done his job, made things right.
Somehow, it made him feel more accomplished than any degree or award.
From what Aiden could hear through the door, Juniper received a stern telling off from the inspections officer, but thankfully nothing more than a warning that this was her ‘first strike.’ With Cerberus’s cage in his arms, they took a cab to his house, Juniper insisting that she oversaw the settling in before she left. Which left him here, on his doorstep, nervous in a way that felt silly because it was her first time visiting. He’d offered for her to come here after the museum trip, but it seemed as though Juniper had been trying not to cross that boundary, and he wouldn’t force her.
He supposed he owed Cerberus a thank you, though it was difficult to appreciate the little ball of fluff when his sawdust smelled a bit like wee.
‘Can you grab my keys?’ he asked, turning to offer his back pocket.
She looked like she wanted to roll her eyes, and then must have remembered that he was doing her a favour and changed her mind. With her nose running in the cold night, she reached into his pocket, fingers lightly brushing his arse in a way that made him hold his breath. Not just because she was touching him, either, but because it felt like such a familiar gesture. They’d closed all of that distance she’d worked hard to put between them in one night, and this time, it wasn’t because they were horny and swept away in a moment. It was because she was vulnerable, and he was helping her.
She slid the key into his lock wordlessly, opening the door into the dark hallway.
‘After you,’ he said when she hovered on the welcome mat. She stepped through, fidgety and hesitant. Why? Why, for once, couldn’t she justbewith him?
She eyed everything like it was her first time seeing someone’s home, not that that was what this was. A home wasn’t something he could ever recall having. His father’s house was too big, big enough to feel like he might vanish among all the light and space, and this flat was just a place to put all his stuff in while he studied. A place to sleep and eat and shower.
He had tried to make it feel like his: his jackets were hung on the coat stand and a few of his favourite paintings added colour to the white walls, but they felt like a way of torturing himself with the life he was supposed to be living. Dad had gifted them to him because he’d wanted his son to appreciate art the way he did: for its beauty, yes, but also its monetary value.He wanted to give Aiden an eye for it so that he’d come to know how to sell, what, why, to who, and for what purpose, too.
When she paused, he took over, guiding her into the living room and flicking on the lights with his elbow. He wondered if she saw this place as he did: a bland, cold space that looked barely lived in, nothing like her room. At least mess was proof that she had a personality, interests. His were stacked on his coffee table. A few tubes of acrylic paint, a stained palette, and a pan of watercolours because he’d wanted to try a different medium if only to get away from the rules he’d lived by his whole life.
There was a low set of cupboards where he’d piled his textbooks, and he shoved them to one side to set Cerberus down. ‘How’s this? He’ll get a bit of light from the window. Do hamsters need light?’
‘It’s better to keep him out of direct sunlight.’
‘Why? Is he flammable?’ It was only half a joke. Aiden knew nothing about caring for another creature. Dad had never let him have pets, probably for good reason: because Aiden was selfish and lazy and unreliable, at least to him. To Aiden, he was just trying to balance the weight of expectations he could barely meet.
Juniper’s look was deadly, which quickly sobered him. ‘He’s nocturnal. He needs consistency. Nothing too bright, but light enough to give him a routine. Here should be fine.’ She nudged the cage just slightly towards the books, where the corner was darker. Inside, Cerberus had disappeared into a little wooden hut.
‘Does he always smell like that?’ Aiden sniffed, then wrinkled his nose.
‘Yes.’
Great. Thank goodness he didn’t have many guests over. ‘How often do I need to clean him?’
‘Never. I don’t need you letting him out and losing him.’ She bent over to look for the hamster in his hut. ‘I’ll come by and take care of that.’
‘Okay. Sounds good.’ Aiden mimicked her, curiously wiggling his finger through the wire cage. Cerberus emerged, his tiny nose and long whiskers twitching as he came to see his new surroundings. He sniffed Aiden’s finger, and then— ‘Ow!’
‘Oh, yeah. Sometimes, he bites.’
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 49
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 71
- Page 72
- Page 73
- Page 74
- Page 75
- Page 76
- Page 77
- Page 78
- Page 79
- Page 80
- Page 81
- Page 82
- Page 83
- Page 84
- Page 85
- Page 86
- Page 87