Page 68

Story: Hold Me

“I don’t have my schedule with me,” I admit. “But I will tell Lynn to give you a call on Monday.”

My mom rolls her eyes, but then looks at me, amused. “To think I need to go through a second person to set a date with one of my sons is unbelievable.”

“You know how Aden is,” Kayden says.

My eyes snap towards him immediately. “What do you mean?”

For a moment, Kayden looks surprised, but then he smiles softly. “You and your phone, dude. You are not made for each other.”

I relax slightly. “Ah, right.”

“You never have it with you,” Mom sighs dramatically.

“Send a letter next time,” I tell her.

Mom pouts while Kayden bursts into laughter. “Or a carrier pigeon,” he grins.

“I’d also accept a message through Morse code,” I add.

“You two are impossible,” Mom exclaims. “Grab the dessert, Kayden, and bring it to the table. My God, you boys.”

Kayden grins while he follows her back to the dining room. It’s only when I follow him that I realize I just joked with him. I didn’t notice. Now that I do, I am not sure how to feel about it. Usually, I jump to conclusions and expect the worst immediately, like when Kayden commented on my phone, but for a split second, I forgot to overthink my interaction with him.

Is this how things could be?

Well, technically, I understand that things could be like that, I am just not sure if I truly want it. Suddenly, there is a stitch in my chest. Kayden laughed. He laughed with me, but it’s the same laugh he had when he laughed and mocked me for being gay.

Everything Kayden says or does always strains my nerves. Like when he called me in the middle of night, and Noel had stayed over for the first time. He was drunk and begging me to come over, and then complained that I never want to see them. Looking back at the talk now, it wasn’t even anything dramatic; I just can’t help but see the worst in him.

My gaze almost instinctively goes towards the table, hoping to see Noel there. My anchor. But he doesn’t seem to be around.

“Linda, do you know where Noel went off to?”

“Oh,” she smiles. “He went outside onto the veranda to catch some fresh air.”

“Thank you.” Overall, she is a very kind woman. I am not sure how Kayden won someone like her over, though, that might be unfair to think. Linda only knows the person Kayden is today, not the one he was when he was a teen.

Difficult. Everything about this place is exhausting.

“I am going to fetch him for dessert,” I tell Mom, before turning around and walking through the living room to the veranda. The door there is leaning open, and I spot Noel standing, his hands on the balustrade, while he looks at the starry sky.

“The night sky here is particularly beautiful.”

The voice startles both Noel and me. Noel turns his head, his stance stiffening slightly when he sees Oliver. The latter has two bottles of wine in his hand. He must have fetched them from Mom’s storage, a small shed with a heater where she keeps some of her groceries.

“It’s beautiful,” Noel finally answers.

It might not be noticeable to many people, but I can pick up the strain in his voice. It makes it even more important that he came here for me today, to help me. I’ll bet this is an exhausting evening for him.

Shaking my head, I reach out towards the door. I don’t want to eavesdrop like a little kid, that is, until Oliver’s voice stops my hand.

“You don’t like me much, do you?”

Noel shrugs. “I don’t know you. Just what Aden told me about you.”

“And that’s nothing good,” Oliver adds.

“Would you?” Noel asks. “Tell nice things about yourself? Would you tell me that you were a great brother who protected his younger sibling?”