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“Where’s Theo?”
“He’s coming. He had to finish up some issues at his resort. Something about the pool heater being broken.”
“It’s December. Who is swimming in the pool?”
“Apparently, everyone who is here for Christmas vacation.”
I hang out with my friends, not interested in starting conversations with new people right now. And I start to relax. Since they don’t know what’s going on with me, I can hang out with them without having to think about the real issues in my life.
I find myself feelingveryhungry, so I get a couple of snack plates, nibbling on them as I sit on the couch and talk.
But then the front door opens again, and I hear his voice.
Ethan.
My heart lurches in my chest, and I instinctively glance toward the entryway. He steps inside, and my breath catches. He looks good—too good, honestly—in his black sweater and dark jeans. I should have known Aurora would invite him. She’s his daughter, after all, and despite everything going on with them, she would want him here.
I just…
His eyes catch mine, and I quickly look away. It’s like my thoughts have stuttered to a stop. I can’t seem to pick up the thread and keep thinking.
Aurora bounds over to him with the same bright energy she greeted me with, and I watch as they exchange a quick hug.
It seems like they’ve moved past what was between them. I don’t know exactly what conversations they’ve had,but it’s clear she has no idea that Ethan and I areofficiallytogether or that I’m pregnant. She’s going to be furious, but tonight, at least, I can pretend none of that exists.
I turn back to my plate of snacks, but I’ve suddenly lost my appetite.
Theo has arrived now, and he has his arm around Mia. He’s telling us a story about an entitled customer who destroyed one of the armchairs in the lobby. I force my lips upward into the semblance of a smile as I nod along.
“Madison.” I hear Ethan just a few feet away. But then, to his credit, he nods to each of Aurora’s friends. “Mia. Zoe. Stella.”
But his eyes return to me and stay on me. I shake my head, just the subtlest little movement that I don’t think anyone else would catch. We talked about keeping things a secret, and if he starts to talk now, then there’s no way my friends won’t figure it out.
“Dad, have you tried the sausage dip?”
Ethan turns and heads toward his daughter, and that’s enough of a hint for me to take a bathroom break. I saw the way he looked at me for a beat longer than necessary. It’s like he’s trying to figure out what’s going on in my head. I feel like I’m unraveling under his gaze.
Once in the bathroom, I allow myself to relax again, but I can feel his presence in the house. I can’t just leave. Aurora still has her silly game that she wants everyone to play, and we’re supposed to be voting for the most festive Christmas sweater, all silly things, but things that Aurora has looked forward to.
I can’t let her down.
Even though I’ve already let her down on the biggest thing possible, it seems like this is something even bigger.
Finally, I get up the nerve to head out of the bathroomand back into the living room. I attach myself to Zoe’s side and float around to different conversations with her.
Every time I glance around, I catch him looking at me, and I can’t help but wonder if he’s thinking about us. Is he thinking about the baby I’m growing? It feels unreal and inescapably real at the same time.
I do my best to avoid him, keeping busy in the kitchen. Zoe and I hang out there with a few guests for a long while.
Then, Ethan walks in and grabs a drink from the fridge. Our eyes catch, and it’s like Zoe senses it.
“Madison, let’s go see if Aurora’s ready to start the game.” She pulls me back into the living room and away from Ethan.
And that’s when I catch it. Aurora is drilling a stare into me. She looks away when we approach her. She was watching. Did she send her dad into the kitchen for a drink to see if we would talk? Is this a test to trick us into giving away that we’re still seeing each other?
“Aurora, let’s play the game now,” Zoe suggests, almost but not completely oblivious to the tension.
“No, we have a couple more guests coming. I want to wait until they get here.”