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“I love you, Cin,” I whispered, wiping the tears from my cheeks. I didn’t have the words—nothing would ever adequately express the gratitude, the love, I held for her.

“I love you back,” she said, holding my gaze for a long moment before giving my hand one last squeeze. Her other foot hit the floor as she leaned her head back onto the chair and tilted it.

“Now,” she started, grinning over at me. “Can you please tell me how you’ve managed to make every man in this castle fall in love with you and your bad attitude?”

A laugh vibrated from my lungs, filling my rooms as I rolled my eyes in her direction. “I can promise you, the only thing they love is tormenting me.”

She raised a skeptical brow. “Elric has been moping around this place like a lovesick puppy, and Dukovich is never more than a foot away from you since Landers left you in that room alone with him.”

“Okay . . . I can admit, bedding Elric was probably a bad idea,” I said, plastering an innocent look on my face.

“Ata!” Cin shrieked, giggling as she chucked a pillow at me. “You’ve traumatized the poor man.”

“I think I may have,” I said sheepishly, wrapping my arms around the pillow as I caught it, and tucking my face into the fabric. I should probably apologize to him. He never deserved to be a casualty in the war I was fighting within myself.

Cin let out a soft chuckle, pushing herself further into the chair. “What about Andrues? It seems like you two have gotten close.”

“We have.” I nodded. “I don’t know why, but he seems to be the only person I haven’t been able to push away or hurt.” My voice quieted as I said the words and I looked down at my nails.

“It seems Andrues is to you what Ardan was to me,” Cin said, a sad smile crossing her lips at the memory of him. “Those friendships are rare, hold on to him.”

I nodded as the word echoed in my head.

Friend.

That is all he was, all I wanted him to be.

“Ata,” Cin said, her eyes looking at me nervously. “What happened to you . . . the assault . . . you have to talk about it. I-It doesn’t have to be with me, and I don’t mean right now, but eventually, when you are ready,pleasetalk to someone.” There was so much fear and worry in her eyes as she said the words, like I might slip back into the darkness at any second.

But I knew she was right, knew I couldn’t keep bottling everything up and expect a different outcome. I had tried it my way so many times, and it only ever led to more pain.

I smiled over at her. “I will.”

Silence fell over the room, a comforting one that had an aura of hope dancing at the edges. I wasn’t okay, and I didn’t think I would be for a long time. But admitting that to myself—accepting it—lifted a weight from my chest that had been crushing me for far too long.

“I am meeting with Yenne this morning,” I said, breaking the silence.

“As in . . . Nethkar’s coven mother?” Cin lifted a brow.

I nodded. “She is going to teach me to harness these visions, and hopefully anything else I can learn in three days.”

Cyloe padded into the room as I spoke, pushing her wolf’s head into my fingers hanging over the arm of my chair and I scratched at her ears before she wandered over to Cin.

“I still cannot believe you have a familiar,” Cin said, grinning down at Cyloe as she sat at her feet. “What’s her name?”

“Cyloe.” A soft smile fell onto my lips as I watched Cyloe place a paw on Cin’s lap.

Of course she immediately liked her.

“Aren’t you such a good girl,” Cin cooed, taking her paw and shaking it as she buried her other hand into her fur. She lowered her face to Cyloe and her giant tongue lapped against Cin’s cheek. She giggled softly, wiping the saliva from her skin as she looked back to me.

“I need you to know,” I started, my voice dropping quiet and full of shame. “I do not blame you for Ardan. I was angry and in pain when I said it, but that is no excuse. You didn’t deserve that.”

Cin looked up at me, her eyes beginning to glisten but she stayed silent as a sad smile lifted the corner of her lips.

“Are you all right, Cin?” I asked and her eyes flitted around the room.

Right.Cain and the mating bond.