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“Dukovich, could you give me and Ata a moment, please?” Cin asked, as she took another step into the room.

Dukovich hesitated, his eyes flicking between the two of us. I could see the reluctance etched in the lines of his face, the protective instinct warring with his respect for her. After a long moment, he gave a curt nod and rose from his seat. He paused as he passed her, leaning in to murmur something I couldn’t quite catch. Cin’s eyes never left mine, but she inclined her head slightly in acknowledgment.

Then Dukovich was gone, the door clicking shut behind him.

Silence stretched between us, heavy and thick with unspoken words. What could I say? How could I possibly begin to apologize for the months of coldness, for the wall I’d erected between us? The pain I had caused?

Cin stood motionless, her blood-soaked form a stark contrast to the sterile cleanliness of the room. I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly dry again despite the water I’d just consumed. I watched as she approached the bed, each step measured and cautious as if she were approaching a wounded animal.

In a way, I supposed I was.

She sank into the chair Dukovich had vacated, her crimson-stained hands clasped tightly in her lap. Up close, I could see the weariness in her eyes, the shadows that lurked beneath the surface.

She looked . . .haunted.

“Ata, I . . .” she began, her voice catching on my name.

“No, please, don’t.” My voice cracked, the words sticking in my throat.

I knew what was coming next and I would not let her be the one to apologize for doing nothing wrong. I shook my head, ignoring the wave of dizziness the motion brought.

“I thought I lost you.” A sob broke from her chest as her hand shot into mine and tears began flowing from my eyes.

I pulled her toward me, not caring about the searing pain bursting like fireworks throughout my body as I dragged her into the bed beside me.

Her hands pulled my head into her chest and it was at that moment that I broke, that I fully released every ounce of turmoil trapped inside my body like a caged beast. It roared to life, taking the form of a cry that shook me to my core, and she only pulled me closer.

I had forgotten what it felt like to be held by her.

Forgotten how much I needed her.

She was my rock and I had fucking hurt her.

My heart shattered and I was thankful for it. I needed it to break. I needed it to be decimated so maybe I could rebuild into someone that didn’t destroy the things they loved.

Fragments of memories flashed behind my eyes and I could feel my throat closing.

Their hands.

Their fucking hands pulling at my body.

Every inch of my skin crawled and I wanted to peel it from my flesh.

They had tainted me—had violated me.

I could swallow the torture, I could face that.

But this.How does one face this?

I would never be able to replace what they took from me and that made me fucking angry. Angry at myself for not fighting harder. Angry at the Gods for letting them steal from me.

They were dead now.

At least they should be, given the amount of blood that covered Cin’s body.

But it didn’t feel like enough.

It didn’t feel like anything would ever be enough to fix this pain.