Page 14 of Your Love (Merrimack Mavericks Hockey #3)
Chapter 14
“All For You”
Kerri - Age 18, 1988
H oly shit. One word—just one single word, “baby,” sent electric currents through my entire body. The huskiness of his voice wrapped around me and settled in, waking up something deep and dormant. It was such a simple word, yet so intimate, and nothing I’d ever heard from him.
He was embarrassed when he realized what he’d said, as if he thought he had made a mistake. But to me, it was perfect. The way his voice softened and his cheeks flushed only added to the intensity of the moment. I’ve always known deep down this man can make me feel things no one else ever could. He confirmed it today with one single word.
How could I have forgotten those amber-colored eyes, strong jawline covered with the perfect amount of stubble, and those brown curls? You’d think I would be accustomed to the way Landry looks by now, but when he swaggered out of the building, I nearly combusted.
The absence of him in my everyday life during the past few months has been a slow form of torture. I’ve tried to immerse myself in my new surroundings and make friends at school, but it’s all still unfamiliar. It’s not home, and the people there don’t feel like home either.
So, instead, I’ve spent most of my days buried in textbooks and lectures, trying to find solace in the mundane routine of general education classes that are in no way challenging or applicable to my future.
The brick walls of my dorm room have suffocated me as I yearned day after day for the comfort of anything familiar. The sounds are nothing I’m accustomed to—the constant humming of the fluorescent lights and the smell of stale coffee from the nearby study lounge have only added to my feelings of loneliness. And don’t get me started on my roommate.
Sonia and I are oil and water, never entirely mixing despite our forced cohabitation. The roommate compatibility questionnaire we filled out upon moving in was a ridiculous attempt at establishing some harmony—one that was ignored. Our lifestyles could not be more different.
I’m an early riser, jolting awake with the first rays of sunlight to attend my morning classes. Call it the curse of growing up on a farm, but I like to wake up with the chickens. Sonia sleeps until well past noon while her heavy snores fill the room, and the curtains are drawn tight to keep it as dark as possible.
Our other habits clash as well. I don’t smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol often, while she indulges in both. She goes through an entire pack of Marlboros every other day and carries a cloud of smoke with her everywhere she goes.
At least we’ve managed to reach a level of tolerance towards each other, though it can hardly be described as friendship. Once our time together is up, we’ll go our separate ways without looking back, but for now, we do our best to coexist begrudgingly. It only makes me realize how lucky I am to have found the friends I have here at home.
As I turn onto the dirt road leading to my grandparent’s home, I roll down my car window and am immediately greeted by a flood of memories and emotions. The earthy aroma of freshly turned soil mingles with the sweet scent of wildflowers, wrapping around me like a warm blanket. Tears prick at my eyes as I am reminded of simpler times, of cherished moments spent in this very place.
Despite only having a few days off, I couldn’t resist the chance to come back here—even for just a short visit. I’ll be in Merrimack a bit longer at Christmas, splitting my time between here and Texas. I can’t wait to see my parents and catch up on their latest adventures, but there’s also a small part of me that worries about running into Beau. I’ve grown a lot since our last interaction, and I don’t want anything to make me revert to the scared girl I was. My parents haven’t seen him in a long time, so maybe he’s moved on from our small town. That would be a fabulous Christmas surprise.
As I pull into the familiar driveway, the sounds of nostalgia wash over me. The gentle mooing of cows, the bleating of sheep, and the cheerful chirping of birds all blend in a symphony that instantly brings a smile to my face. But before I can visit the animals, I make a quick stop inside to greet Nana and Papa.
In the kitchen, Nana is busy crafting her famous Thanksgiving pies while Papa hovers nearby, pretending to be helpful but mostly getting in her way. The warm aroma of cinnamon and apples fills the air and takes me back to every holiday spent in the kitchen with my family. It’s like stepping back in time—a comforting reminder of the love and warmth that always radiates from being with the ones you love.
I eagerly make my way over to them, like I’m floating on a cloud, and wrap myself in Papa’s arms. His warmth and love envelop me. It’s as if all of life’s worries and stress melt away in that moment.
“You’re home early, Kerri Ann,” Papa exclaims. His embrace is infused with the familiar scent of wood, hay, and Old Spice, and it makes me smile. “I hope you weren’t driving too fast in that fancy red car of yours,” he teases playfully.
“Me?” I reply, feigning innocence. “Never.”
Papa gives me a knowing smile. “Don’t think I don’t know about your lead foot,” he chuckles. And he’s right. I do tend to speed, especially when I’m in a hurry to get somewhere important. And today was no exception. “I finished my final exam early,” I confess sheepishly. “I thought I’d swing by and say howdy to Landry first. I caught the end of his hockey practice.”
The image of Landry gliding effortlessly on the ice, his body twisting and turning with controlled grace, floods my mind like a bittersweet dream. I shake my head to clear my thoughts, trying to focus on the present moment.
Papa’s words snap me back to reality. “How is Landry?” he asks genuinely, his curiosity piqued. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen him.”
“I think he’s good,” I tell him. “We didn’t really have a chance to talk, but we’re going to hang out later.”
“Well, when he comes over, I’m going to have to thank him again for sending Trevor my way,” he says with a smile. “That young man has been an enormous asset around here.”
“I’m so glad. I’ve never met Landry’s cousin, but he speaks highly of him.”
“He’s a good kid, just like Landry. Hard worker,” Papa nods proudly.
“It makes me feel better that you have help around here.”
“So, tell me about that fancy college of yours,” he prompts enthusiastically. “How are you liking it?”
“It’s…” I pause, trying to find the right words to describe my experience so far. “It’s fine,” I reply honestly, my hands fidgeting with a loose thread on my sweater. “The campus is like something out of a movie. The architecture is breathtaking, and it’s surrounded by vast green lawns that stretch as far as the eye can see.”
“Sounds like quite the place,” he remarks.
“It is.” I release a sigh and look down at my feet. “But I miss this place,” I admit softly, gesturing to our surroundings. “I miss the comfort of home and my friends.” The memories flood back of the laughter and late nights. A pang of homesickness hits me even though I’m currently home. It’s an odd feeling that I force myself to push down.
“Well, I think that’s normal,” he says. “It will get easier. And before you know it, you’ll be back.”
My heart aches for that and for spending more summer days with Landry. Our relationship is a tangled mess of conflicting emotions, but it’s still the best thing in my life. Despite my dedication to preserving our friendship, my desire for him burns brighter than the sun, more so after seeing him today.
I’ve been avoiding broaching the topic with him, afraid of what it may mean for us. But ignoring these intense emotions only intensifies them. It’s time to face them head-on. As difficult as it may be, I know that’s the only way forward.
After dinner, I pace in the living room as my stomach churns with a mix of nervousness and excitement. Finally, the tell-tale sounds of his truck rumbling down the road reach my ears.
I want to rush to the door when he knocks, but I hold myself back since Nana is on her way, and I don’t want to run over my beloved grandmother. As soon as she opens the door, a gust of air rushes into the room, carrying with it the familiar scent of Landry. It’s a mixture of cologne and something that is uniquely him.
My eyes scan over him, taking in every detail of his appearance. His faded jeans cling perfectly to his muscular legs. His black shirt hugs tightly against his chest, and the thought of burying my face against it makes me blush. I notice his hair is still damp from another shower, and small curls are already beginning to form around his ears. The combination of his masculine features and slightly disheveled appearance leaves me breathless.
A shiver runs through me as the cold November air nips at my skin. I turn to Landry, trying to hide the goosebumps that have appeared on my arms. “Where’s your jacket?”
“You know I run hot,” he replies nonchalantly, but his words send a rush of heat through my body, and I laugh nervously, a slight blush creeping onto my cheeks. The warmth from his proximity is almost suffocating, making my heart beat faster as I try to steady my breath. My Nana and Landry both look at me with questioning expressions, probably wondering if I’ve lost my mind. And maybe I have.
Breaking the awkward silence, I suggest, “So, what do you want to do tonight?”
Landry shrugs, his eyes sparkling. “Wanna go bowling?”
“That sounds like fun,” Nana chimes in with a smile.
“Don’t wait up for me,” I say to her while grabbing my jacket and beanie from the coat rack.
“Have a good time, kids,” she says with a smile before disappearing back into the warm kitchen to continue her baking. As we walk out into the crisp night air, I’m grateful for a reprieve from the heat that came from the intensity of that moment.