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“Mhmm.” I nod. “I was that foster kid being tossed around from foster family to foster family for all of my elementary and middle school years. It wasn’t great, I’ll tell you that.

But once I met Nick and Rebecca…” I glance at Scarlett, noticing her glistening eyes.

“They changed my life. Nick is the one who introduced me to hockey. He gave me an outlet for my energy. My anger. He helped me focus on something bigger than myself. I owe them the world. They officially adopted me before I turned eighteen and for the first time in a very long time I felt like I was part of something. An actual family.”

“No way,” August mumbles, dumbfounded. “How did we never know this about you, Ledge?”

I shrug my shoulder. “Because it never needed to come up, I guess. Nick and Rebecca are my family. I sort of allowed myself to forget about my biological parents because there was nothing good there.”

“I’m sorry to hear that, man,” Oliver says. “But is that why you think you wouldn’t be a good dad? Because your real parents weren’t good people?”

I nod slowly. “My dad…wasn’t a good person. And if I have some of those same traits, it would kill me to pass them on to a kid, you know?”

Harrison frowns and shakes his head. “No way, man. That isn’t going to happen.

” I give him a questioning glance, but he continues.

“And I can say that with absolute certainty because I’ve seen you work with kids at Pucks & Blades.

You’re great with them. You never lose your temper.

You’re an encourager and a helper through and through.

I mean, will you hit bumps along the road when it comes to being a parent?

Sure. I imagine all parents do, but that’s normal.

As far you as thinking you’re going to become some raging monster of a man?

” He shakes his head again. “Not happening. You can breathe easy there, Ledge.”

A raging monster of a man…

My dad killed my mom.

So yeah…that’s exactly what I fear.

“I know I can speak for my parents when I say we are thrilled you found our family, Ledger,” Scarlett says to me. “You were the perfect fit for Uncle Nick and Aunt Becca.” She takes my hand in hers and gives it a squeeze. “We love you so much.”

“Thanks, Scarlett. You know I love you and Uncle Dale and Aunt Trish as well. You’re literally the best family I could’ve ever found.

” I swing my gaze around the room. “And same goes for all of you. I know we don’t always say it, but you guys are brothers to me and I always appreciate that you’re around when I need you. ”

There’s a comfortable silence that settles between us followed by the most awkward pause in conversation. Finally, Oliver comes to our aid.

“Not to pull us away from our mushy feelings but back to Marlee. Since this first cycle didn’t work out, that clearly means you did the thing once already.” He motions with his pointer finger, pushing it into the hole of his fist.

“Yes. Though it wasn’t what you would necessarily think.”

“Did you have to jizz in a cup?” Harrison asks.

“Yeah. But she had this at-home insemination kit, so it was more like put it in a cup and then pull it out with a syringe type thing and insert it.”

Harrison’s brows lift. “Oh, you had to do all that?”

Griffin sits back against the couch with his arms folded against his chest. “Tell them what you bought her, bro.”

Oh, for Christ’s sake.

“To answer your question, Harrison, I didn’t have to do all that, but Marlee got nervous so I offered. So yes, I did all that for her.”

“Holy shit, bro!” Oliver exclaims. “You saw her?—”

“Yep,” I answer with a nod before he has the chance to finish his sentence.

Oliver shakes his head. “Dude…”

Scarlett nudges her husband. “Don’t even ask him what it looked like Oli. It was a pussy. You’ve seen mine a thousand times and if you’ve seen one you’ve seen eMPH!—”

Oliver slaps his hand over his wife’s mouth. “Babe, I love you more than life itself but if you think one pussy is just like another, you would be dead fucking wrong.”

Ella’s brows pinch together and she lets out a snort. “Come on guys, really? I mean there’s no way they’re that different.”

Getting up from the couch to grab another beer, Griffin lays a hand on Ella’s shoulder and with a smirk on his face tells her, “Trust me babe. I’ve seen a lot of them and they absolutely do not all look the same.” He leans in and whispers, “I’m sure yours is beautiful though. Don’t worry.”

August gives him a warning glare. “Hey.”

Griffin laughs, raising his hands in a defensive pose. “I’m just saying!”

“Anyway,” I say, clearing my throat to bring the attention back to our conversation.

“Yes I’ve seen all the things and yes I helped Marlee that night and yes, I bought her a vibrator because I read that having an orgasm helps in getting her body to relax so the sperm have a fighting chance. And before you ask, yes…I…”

Fuck, I’m going to catch so much shit for this.

“I helped her with that too.”

At my confession, everyone’s brows shoot up and goofy smiles spread across their faces before they all start talking at once.

“What the fuck? You gave Marlee an orgasm?”

“Oh, my God, you’re serious?”

“Oh, you are one slyyy motherfucker, Ledger Dayne.”

“Well, that’s one way to go about it, I guess.”

“So, you’re not fucking but you’re fucking?”

“Is that in the contract? Give me your sperm and an orgasm?”

“But was it a good orgasm or just a piddly little thing?”

I flip off Bear for even asking that question. “Fuck you, bro. She seemed quite satisfied after I was done with her, thank you very much.”

“Sooo okay,” Ella says, calming everyone down. “This cycle didn’t work and you saw her at work crying and you offered to take her home?”

I nod. “Yeah. And I think this is where I might have fucked myself.”

“Because?” she asks, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Because I bought her all the chocolate I could find in the drugstore and then got us both Mario’s for a late lunch.”

Scarlett shrugs with an approving nod. “So far, so good.”

“I gave her some of my sweats to change into so she wasn’t in her work clothes plus she was feeling all crampy and then we uh…we snuggled on the couch and watched a couple romcoms for the rest of the evening.”

Ella smiles, lifting her arms to each side. “That sounds amazingly cute and romantic and I think you did an excellent job, so what are you worried about?”

“I’m worried because I think she wanted me to kiss her and I didn’t.

” I push my hand through my hair. “I mean, there was this moment between us that I felt was…raw and vulnerable and I wanted to make sure to say all the things to get to her understand how perfect I think she is and honestly, I think I succeeded there, but in doing so I raised the tension between us a bit and it really felt like we could’ve kissed.

We should have kissed. I have no doubt it would’ve been amazing, but I was too chicken shit to do it so I kissed her forehead instead. ”

My body deflates with my confession.

“Uh, yes.” August gives a sympathetic nod. “The old why didn’t I kiss her when I should have panic.” He gestures towards Ella and murmurs, “Been there, dude. Remember?”

Bear chuckles beside me. “So, you weren’t afraid to push a syringe inside her filled with your jizz. You weren’t afraid to pleasure her with a vibrator. But the thought of kissing her freaked you the fuck out?”

Ugh.

He’s right.

“Well, when you put it that way…Yeah. I sound like a pathetic loser.”

“You’re not a loser, Ledge,” Scarlett says, wrapping an arm around me. “You’re one of the nicest guys I know and you sincerely care about people. Especially Marlee. Any of us can see that. We’ve known it for a long time now.”

“Agreed,” Ella and Corrigan say in tandem.

“I mean, did you maybe miss an opportunity to really show her how you feel?” Ella asks. “Yeah, but there will be plenty of other opportunities because you will be trying this baby-making stuff all over again in a few weeks, right?”

“Yeah. Which is another thing.” I huff. “This would be so much easier if we could just try it the old-fashioned way.”

“Have you asked her about it?” Harrison inquires.

“And say what? ‘Hey Marlee, can we just fuck it out and eliminate the cup and syringe?’”

“Do you think she would be receptive to the idea of going about it the old-fashioned way?” Griffin asks.

I shrug, feeling a bit overwhelmed with all my thoughts and emotions on the matter. “I honestly have no idea. I think she’s trying to keep this as non-sexual as possible. And maybe she’s doing that more for me than herself because she thinks that’s how I’d prefer it? I don’t know.”

“I guess you won’t really know till you ask her,” Griffin says. Just then his phone beeps in his pocket. He pulls it out and smiles at the text message he likely just received from his wife.

“Is that Layken?” Ella asks him. “Maybe we should tell her to chat with Marlee and feel her out a bit.”

Griffin holds his phone up in the air and proudly states, “She’s one step ahead of you.”

He gestures to me with a nod of his chin and reads her text message.

“Hey babe, if you see Ledger, tell him he’s the subject of every conversation that has come out of Marlee’s mouth today!

” He wags his brows at me. “She even sent the heart-eyes emoji. She never sends me that one. She always sends me the eggplant, the tongue, and the water droplets. So, I think this heart-eye one is all for you.”