Page 19 of We Could Be Better

CASH

I was riding all around thinking about what just happened and found myself right back in Kyra circular driveway.

The moment that little girl walked in the house I knew she was for me.

I didn’t understand how Kyra could keep something like this from me though.

Paisley looked so much like my mother it was crazy; I wanted answers from Kyra and I needed them now.

I got out of the car and walked in the house I wanted to talk to Kyra and see what was going on.

How was it possible we had a child together and she never mentioned anything about it to me?

I had talked about having kids with Kyra all the time; I gave her more than enough chances to tell me we had a child together.

When I walked in she was sitting in the living room with all the lights all listening to Pandora while sipping on a cup of hot chocolate.

It was crazy to me how beautiful this woman was even in the dark she had a way of shinning.

I had to admit I was enjoying the scene, but I just couldn’t see myself with a liar.

I sat down and just stared at her she didn’t even look my way; she just told me everything from begging to the end even about how her bitch ass ex husband was the one stalking everyone.

I needed to get away from her and clear my mind.

Kyra knew me better than anyone else so she knew that I didn’t like liars.

I was big on trust and if we didn’t have trust in a relationship then we have nothing.

So for everything she had nothing to tell me I wasn’t mad at her I was hurt more than anything, because I had missed so much of my daughter life.

I left Kyra house in hopes that it would take my mind off her secret that she was hiding, but the more I rode around the more I thought about the situation.

I can’t believe that I missed 7 years of my daughter life, because he mom decided to be selfish and keep her from me.

I know I was a child but I could handle my own.

I mean look at me now; I have more than enough money to take care of her.

All Ky had to do was stick around and wait things out.

Kyra ass was just mad as hell because we couldn’t be together so she got scared and ran away.

I thought I would be able to get over it and not be mad at her but I’m mad as hell.

A little relived that she told me about her and not let me find it out from someone else but I couldn’t get over the lie.

I just don’t think I’ll be able to forgive her for this one.

Before I’m anything I’m a man and can hold my own.

I knew the very moment I saw Paisley that she was mine.

They didn’t have to say anything; she looked just like my mama.

Speaking of ma dukes I couldn’t wait to bring Pai to meet her.

I know she would love to finally have a girl.

I rode all around that night without a destination.

I ended up in the driveway of the last place I needed to be, but it was like every time my head was going in overdrive her head would make everything go away.

I started to back out but who am I fooling after the shit Ky pulled I real life wasn’t fucking with her anymore and I needed to relive some stress.

“Who is it?” Bella asked from the other side of the door

“Cash”

“What do you want?” she asked.

I had to admit Bella was a real pretty female; it’s just crazy how bad her attitude was and I don’t a real nigga that like mess and drama.

If she calm down maybe a nigga might wife her, but with the way she was going I truly doubt that would happen any time soon.

All of her friends were messy so I guess she couldn’t be any other way.

Any friend that let you make a fool of yourself in front a crowd of people wasn’t a real friend and that’s just how I felt about her friends.

She opened the door for me to come in and just like she use to, she wasted no time getting to business.

“You must miss this pussy daddy. That lil girl wasn’t doing what it took to satisfy you huh?”

This the shit that turned me off from a lot of bitches.

If I’m here fucking you then your main concern shouldn’t be another female, it should be getting this dick.

Kyra just didn’t know she had a lot of these hoes intimidated and I just didn’t understand why.

I didn’t even have my mom name tatted on me and here she was with her name big and bold going straight across my back.

She just didn’t get it though; she was so stuck the past she couldn’t even see that I was really trying to love her.

At this point in life I wasn’t too sure if I wanted to be with her anymore.

Keeping my child hidden from me for all these years were far worse than what any enemy has ever done to me.

I missed damn near 8 years of her life because her mom decided she wanted to be selfish.

I pushed Bella back and left her house. She had the potential to be somebody girl, but I couldn’t give her what she wanted if my heart was with another woman.

I rode around all night without anywhere to go here it was 6 in the morning and I was sitting in my brother driveway.

I knew I would be able to talk to him about anything, but I was a man not the little boy that would always run to big brother for help.

All that went out the window once I found out about Paisley; I tried to think about something different to get my mind off the betrayal I was feeling towards her mother.

“Fuck” I said to myself as I continued punching the steering wheel throwing a tantrum like a kid.

“You good baby boy?” Keem asked as he got in the car

“How did you know I was here?”

“I knew you would eventually come; I waited all night for you.”

I just broke down crying look I’m far from a bitch I can tell you that, but having a little girl is so different.

From the moment I laid eyes on her I knew she was mine and at that very moment I fell in love with her.

Those long jet black plaits and those eyes she reminded me so much of my mother.

The last time I cried this hard we were putting out dad in the ground; I hadn’t been sad since that day.

But being a father myself and missing so much of my child life took me to a dark place and had me feeling like a buster.

“Look at me Cash; I know how much you probably hate the fact that she hid Pai. But yall were young and you were deep it the streets at that time trying to make a name for yourself. Maybe it was best that she did keep her away and out of harm’s way.”

“She didn’t keep her out of harm’s way though, if she did that would be different. She just kept her away from me for her own selfish reasons.”

“Man you can’t think like that! Just go in there and get your daughter she’s an awesome child she remind me so much of you.” He was right I didn’t have time to dwell on Kyra ass. I needed to spend some time with my daughter.

“Man pack yall shit we going to Disney World be ready for 10. I need a nap before we get on that road.”

We dapped each other up and I sent Kyra a text letting her know I’ll be there for 9:30 and to pack her and Paisley enough clothes for the week.

I was about to enjoy this little vacation I just hope Kyra don’t make me curse her ass out.

I was still mad at her but Paisley needed to know both parents and I would have felt right just going without bringing her.