Page 8

Annalise

I dream about him a lot—the white-haired man. Though now it seems silly to think he’s a man. He must be a beast. And he must have been very important in my life. He is all that plagues my dreams at night. I realize now those dreams are memories trying to awaken the woman I was before whatever accident befell me.

I wish I knew his name. I feel like it would help me navigate a lot of my memories. Some with him are filled with pleasure, while others are spent in pain. Some are late-night conversations, and others are him screaming at me while I kneel in terror. And although these dreams become more and more vivid each day, they do not feel like a part of me. Not yet. And I don’t know if it’s because I don’t want to remember or if some outside source is preventing me.

“Annalise. Where’s your head today?” I look up from the cup of tea to see Elias sitting across from me with an irritated expression. Elias isn’t in any of my memories, making me wonder just how he came into my life. The white-haired man outweighs his presence, even though I have no idea what he looks like.

“I don’t know,” I say softly.

I look back to Elias, deciding to take a gamble.

“You said humans created whatever I am…what did you mean by that?” I ask.

I know that I risk angering him by asking him something like this. But I have to take risks if I want to escape. That includes learning more about myself and controlling the power Elias wants inside of me. His eyes narrow, and he sits up, his body language indicating he is on alert with my line of questioning.

“Why?” he asks.

I take a deep breath to remain steady as I speak so that I don’t give away my desire for information. I must remain innocent in all ways.

“You said you are a beast. And that I am the product of humans knowing what you are,” I say. “You said your forefathers created me by accident. What does that mean?” I ask.

Elias studies me intensely, debating whether or not to tell me information that he is unsure of.

Finally, he shakes his head.

“I don’t know what you are, exactly. You blur the line between beast and human and something called a hunter. My forefathers gave humans the means to fight creatures who are more animalistic than us. But instead of sticking to fighting, they used those means to breed. You are… floating around in a space that no one has acknowledged yet but me. You don’t have a name yet, as no one has acknowledged your existence,” he says.

I suck in a trembling breath. “I see.”

“And there are others like me?” I ask.

Elias chuckles.

“Why? You are never leaving my sight, nor would I allow them to live if I came into contact with them. They are a liability to my kind,” he says.

I flinch from the harshness of his words but continue anyway.

“Why not? If what you desire is to be the first to conquer me, why not them as well? Why spare me if I am a liability to your kind?” I ask.

Elias looks toward the sky before looking back at me.

“If you don’t know the answer to that, then you must have truly lost your memory,” he laughs.

I look away, battling the frustration that I feel. While I have been planning for my escape, I have barely made any ground when it comes to Elias himself. I have learned his kingdom, his battle plan, and even his training sessions with his men. I have studied their way of battle, which I attribute to them being more animal than human, seeing how they use their bodies to fight. But none of this has given me the proper ammunition I need against Elias. I need to get him to leave the palace soon to begin his conquest.

And I need him to bring me along.

But because I lost control, I know he won’t trust me outside of his palace without chains to keep me by his side. And with no information about my past, I have no idea how to make what happened in my chambers when I killed a servant happen again. My only hope at this point is to earn Elias’s trust and leave when his guard is down. But that doesn’t look to be possible at the moment.

“You knew who I was before my accident,” I say slowly. I know this is very dangerous ground for Elias. Dangerous enough that he might break something to prevent me from ever speaking of it again.

“Yes,” Elias says after a moment. I shift my attention to the cup of tea, my mind racing as I take it in. I always have this issue: drinking tea. My body reacts in terror, but I always end up forcing myself so as not to alert Elias. Now is no different.

“Was I a part of a village with people like me?” I ask.

Elias is out of his seat instantly. My eyes can’t register his movement as he rips me up from my seat, kicking my legs out from under me. I collapse with a loud cry before he grips my arm roughly, bending it at an unnatural angle.

I scream, trying to right my body, but he continues to push until I feel my bones straining.

“‘I have no interest in my past life’ those were your words, Annalise. Why are you asking about something you never wanted to recover?” he growls.

He doesn’t give me an opportunity to plead as he pulls harder, the strain forcing tears into my eyes.

“Please! Stop!” I gasp.

“Why should I?” he says above me, pushing deeper. His taunts force my mind into a panic as memories flash across my mind, once again overwhelming me. I cry out as the symbol on my side burns hot, threatening to consume me. It scalds at my flesh, making my blood feel as though it’s on fire from the strain, my bones threatening to snap. I’ve never felt like this before. It’s unbearable. And Elias knows it.

He rips me up from the ground, shoving me into the nearest column. I cry out from the force, but he’s already ripping my dress up, a challenge in his eyes as he looks at me, helplessly writhing between him and the column.

I cry out as he enters me roughly, his hand gripping my jaw to hold my gaze.

“Do you understand now just how weak you are? Do you think calling on him whenever you are in trouble will help you? I told you, I will control every part of you. Every. Fucking. Part,“ he growls.

“Ngh!” The force of Elias’s thrusts causes a pained groan to leave my lips, and I find myself pathetically fighting him. My own nails claw at his face, but I am too weak to do any damage. And he’s enjoying it.

“That’s it, Annalise. Fight me with everything you have. So that you’ll understand just how little it will help you here,” he growls out.

He continues to thrust, pushing himself flush against me as he has his way with me. My eyes drift around the small room in a panic before landing on the cup of tea that sits untouched on the table. It’s a weird thing to focus on at a time like this. But I know the heavy ache in my chest isn’t from Elias. It’s that cup.

And I am confident Elias knows the connection.

“That should do.” I keep my eyes down as the healer steps away from me, my arm no longer throbbing in pain from Elias’s attack. I make sure to keep my eyes down to avoid his gaze.

I have to keep the facade that I am afraid.

In reality, I am angry. I made a miscalculation that may cost more than I thought. I knew Elias didn’t trust me, and I knew he did not like talking about my past. But I let my impatience get the better of me, hoping that the small bit of me bending over to reveal more cleavage or batting my lashes could let his guard down.

He’s still a king.

He won’t let his guard down so easily, and now I know why. He let it slip.

“Do you think calling on him every time you are in trouble will help you?”

It’s the first time he’s let on that there might be someone out there looking for me. Or someone who is responsible for this marking. But now it’s just a matter of figuring out who this person is and how I could possibly find them. That is if Elias hasn’t killed them already.

“What is it you hope to accomplish by asking me questions?” Elias asks, breaking the silence. I pull in a trembling breath so that he thinks I am frightened to speak before shaking my head.

“I’m sorry, Your Majesty. I overstepped,” I say softly.

Elias studies me intensely, but I keep my eyes down. I can’t ask him for any more information after earlier. He needs to think he’s breaking me down every time he uses force.

Suddenly, a better idea pops into my head. As I speak, I slowly lift my gaze, peeking at him through tear-brimmed eyes.

“I was just curious as to what set me apart from my people,” I say.

Elias scoffs.

“You have no people. I merely wanted you. There is nothing else to it,” he says.

I nod, shifting my attention away from him as I feign sadness.

“It’s just overwhelming, not knowing who I am or where I came from…I feel like I have no purpose,” I say with a shuddering breath.

Silence washes over us, but I feel Elias’s gaze on me. After a moment, he gently places his hand on my back.

“Anna—”

A light knock sounds at the door before Elias can finish his sentence. I bite back my rage as my small victory is interrupted by Elias’s second-in-command entering the room. He briefly glances in my direction before murmuring something to Elias. He doesn’t react but turns his attention to the healer present.

“Finish up here, escort Annalise to my chambers once you are done,” he says. He glances in my direction, approaching me and placing his finger under my chin.

“Do not think about pulling any of your shit, Annalise. I won’t show mercy if this keeps happening,” he says.

He roughly grips my jaw, forcing my gaze to his when I don’t respond.

“Do you understand?” he growls.

“Of course, Your Majesty,” I say quickly.

Elias releases me, exiting the room without a backward glance just as the healer pulls my arm out to look at the scar that remains on my arm.

“What is so damaged about me that you cannot fix?” I ask, referring to the last time I had a session with her. She told Elias that she couldn’t bring me to full strength without multiple healing sessions.

She looks up at me, her irritation shining through.

“What are you talking about?” she asks.

“When I came to you before, you told the king that there was too much damage. And that if he wanted me to return to full strength, I would have to visit you often,” I say, observing her reaction.

She chuckles, shaking her head.

“You are broken. Your mind cannot process the trauma that has befallen your body. You are disconnected and fragmented.” She approaches me, roughly gripping my arm as she speaks. “You have a weak form. Too much damage has been done. Your body is distraught but does not know why. I can heal you, but it doesn’t erase what happened. It’s like adding water to a shattered vase. No matter how many times we fix it, the cracks put too much strain on the structure, resulting in leaks,” she says, studying me.

Her eyes are the same distasteful shade as Elias’s as she studies me. I gently pull my arm from her grip, rubbing my wrist lightly.

“You should stop asking questions, girl. The king has decided everything for you. There is no use in recovering what was done. Your present mind won’t survive it.”