Page 26 of Up In Flames

Oren

W ill wasn’t completely comfortable with my presence among his friends. I tried not to take it personally. After all, I’d been the one to insist over and over again that it wouldn’t bother me. Who knew I’d be such a liar?

His friends seemed like good people. Solid and steady people. They clearly cared enough about him to put their lives on the line with him and for him. But would coming out change that for him? I had my doubts.

Once the first pitcher of beer was gone, I took that as my cue to leave. I’d encroached on Will’s fun enough for one evening.

“I should head out,” I told them.

The conflict in Will’s gaze was easy to see, for me at least. He wanted me there, but there was a certain relief to me leaving. Hal had drank one beer, then ordered fries and wings, which he demolished.

“I’ll give you a lift,” Hal said. He peeled away a couple bills and tucked them under his plate for the waitress. The pub was starting to get busier, and he didn’t have the greatest seat in the house. He stood and gave his chair back to the table he’d stolen it from.

“It was nice meeting you,” I said to Briggs and Jonas. They both had that glassy-eyed, beer goggle look on their faces. Will wasn’t too far behind. “Make sure you guys take a cab or something, okay?” I rubbed at a sudden ache in my sternum.

Understanding flashed in Will’s gaze and he nodded. I’d have kissed him goodbye… except he wasn’t out.

One day he would be. I had faith in that much at least.

The evening air was fresh and clean compared to the stifling atmosphere in the bar. Hal slid into step next to me as we made our way back to where he’d parked.

After a few minutes of silence, he spoke. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. It was just weirder than I expected it to be. Harder.” I swiped my sweaty hands on the sides of my pants.

“I think that’s normal.”

“You do?” Hal was a few years older than I was, and I appreciated the way he gave me his perspective on things without ever treating me like an idiot kid the way some of the professors at law school had. Hell, like some of the other students had done too.

“Up until now, you’ve hung out with Will on a one-on-one basis. Adding other people into the mix changes the dynamic. Especially when the two of you can’t carry on as you normally do. It’ll level out and be less weird. You just need to give it more time.”

More time. Right. I could do that. I had time. Will and I had just barely started dating. I’d come out because I had no one and nothing to lose by doing so. Things weren’t the same for Will. I almost envied him. Friends. Family. Parents who gave a shit.

Will might be worried about losing people, but at least he had people to lose.

I had him. And Hal. Liam. Simon. Simon was my boss and not my friend, but I truly felt like he had my back.

I couldn’t be upset at Will for not wanting to lose the people close to him.

From experience, I knew how much that sucked.

“It’ll get better,” Hal assured me as we climbed into his car.

“You know, Hal, for some reason, I think I believe you.”

He shot me a wide smile, flashing his gold tooth at me. The one that only appeared when he smiled a certain way. “That’s because I’m right, and you know it. I’ve been right about a lot of things. It’s why Simon keeps me around.”

“I thought he kept you around because the two of you are secretly hot for each other.”

Hal’s cheeks turned a ferocious shade of pink. “Between you and me, that ship sailed a long time ago.”

I scoffed and buckled my seat belt. “Looks like SS Simon has circled back.”

“We’re not talking about that.”

His tone was carefully nonchalant, so I did as asked and dropped the subject. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him by poking at old wounds.

“Thanks for coming with me.” I’d practically dragged Hal to the pub. I’d wanted to see Will, but I was terrified to go alone. I wanted some kind of a buffer between his friends and me.

“Simon will be pleased to know that his employees are bonding outside of office hours.”

“Too bad it won’t get us out of the next team building exercise,” I lamented.

“What, you don’t like escape rooms?” Hal laughed and eased the car out of the parking space and onto the street.

“I don’t like being trapped.”

His head whipped to the side and understanding made his eyes widen. “The accident?”

I nodded. After a block or two, I found my voice. “I don’t remember everything, but I remember being stuck. Trapped in that car.”

Copper. Gas. Smoke. Copper. Blood. Smoke. Blood.

My gut tightened at the memory. I cracked the window for some fresh air. “Will pulled me out. Then… flames.”

“I’ll talk to Simon.”

“I can do it. I just… I didn’t want to seem like a big baby. Like oh, no, don’t lock me in a room that’s perfectly safe and I’m not actually trapped in. But the idea makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up.”

“Then you won’t go. It’s that simple. You can be involved in the exercise some other way. Or you can sit this one out.”

“Are you sure Simon will be okay with that? And what about everyone else? I don’t want them to think I’m getting special treatment.”

“Everyone else hasn’t gone through what you went through. It hasn’t even been a year, has it?”

I shook my head. Ten months. Three weeks. Four days. But who was counting?

“Not yet.”

“Simon will understand. I can talk to him if you’d prefer.”

It was something I should be able to handle on my own, but I didn’t know if I would. Chances were, if left up to me, I wouldn’t say anything. Swallowing past a knot of emotion, I nodded. Hal gave me a gentle smile, a head nod, and changed the subject.

What I liked about Hal the most was his ability to read people. He was good at knowing what to say and when, and when to say nothing at all. The rest of the drive passed in silence. He dropped me off outside my building and promised to talk to Simon first thing.

My apartment felt emptier than it usually did, and I turned on the television just so I’d have some background noise.

Stripping out of my work clothes, I dressed in a pair of lounge pants and a shirt that Will had left at my place the week before.

Or had I taken it from his place? I couldn’t remember now, but it didn’t matter.

I liked wearing his stuff. I’d never been able to steal clothes from a significant other before.

I suddenly understood why women liked to “borrow” their boyfriend’s hoodies.

Wearing his shirt made me feel closer to him.

I was such a fucking goner for him. Maybe we shouldn’t hang out in public together. I’d been terrified that his friends would take one look at me and see the hearts in my eyes.

Dinner was a frozen pizza that tasted like disappointment after knowing what Will’s homemade pizza tasted like.

The man could make anything. He’d made the pizza dough from scratch and insisted that we do our own toppings.

I did note a distinct lack of pineapple among the options available and had called him on it.

He didn’t care. According to him, only heathens put pineapple on pizza.

My pizza was half gone, and I’d slumped further down into my couch.

Some kind of crime show played on the television, but I wasn’t paying much attention to it.

It wasn’t particularly late yet, but I wanted to go to bed anyway.

If I were sleeping, I wouldn’t be stupidly missing Will even though I’d seen him earlier on.

I turned the TV off and got up from the couch. I carried the pizza to the kitchen intending to put it away, but a knock at my door distracted me. Frowning, I padded to the door and looked through the peephole.

Warmth spread through my chest at the sight of Will in my hallway, standing there casually with his hands tucked in his pockets.

I undid the security chain, unlocked the deadbolt, and yanked the door open.

“Hey,” I breathed out, suddenly feeling lighter than I’d felt all evening.

“Hey.” A smile tugged at his lips, and he stepped inside.

“Couldn’t stay away?” I asked as I shut the door.

Will came up behind me, and hands bracketed my hips. Lips brushed against the back of my neck.

“Something like that.” Will’s nose bumped against the shell of my ear, then he buried it in my hair.

“Did you just sniff me?”

He had me trapped between him and the door. I pressed into him, relishing the warmth of his body against mine. His grip on my hips tightened, and he ground his bulge against my ass.

“Tonight was torture,” Will admitted. He mouthed the shell of my ear and slid his hands under my shirt, giving me goosebumps.

“I wanted to kiss you so bad,” I confessed.

One of Will’s hands wandered around the front and slid down my lounge pants. He let out a laugh, more a puff of air than an actual laugh, at the fact that I’d gone commando.

“Well, this is interesting.” He took me in hand, his other arm snaking under the shirt and up until he was cradling me against him.

My back pressed to his chest, his hand on my chest keeping me there, as if I wanted to be anywhere else.

The dry slide of his hand on my dick shouldn’t have felt as good as it did, but already I was close to coming undone.

“Will, please.” I tilted my head, letting his mouth have more access to my neck.

I didn’t have to ask him to kiss me there; he just did.

He knew the signs of my body, of what it was asking for.

His stubble scraped against my skin, reminding me how easy it would be for him to ruin me.

He could mark me everywhere with only his mouth.

He could leave me a wreck with only his lips, his teeth, and that infuriatingly hot five o’clock shadow.

“Please, what, Oren?” A thumb brushed against my nipple, making me gasp. “What do you need?”

As if he didn’t know.

As if he was unaware that I needed him.

As if there was any doubt that I needed his body on my body. His cock in my ass. His mouth on mine. His fucking heart.

Oh, God. I loved him.

The realization slammed into me, leaving me breathless in a whole different way. I fucking loved Will Dorsey, and there was no way I could possibly share that revelation just yet.

“Will, please. I need you in me.”

His answering laugh told me he was only too happy to oblige.