Page 6

Chapter 6

Apollo

I double check Jasper’s message, making sure he really said he would be back by 7 AM. He did. It’s 7:30. Sighing, I put the phone down again and look into the mirror above the bed. The breakfast I made for him is going to get cold. Wouldn’t be the first time, but today, I feel especially needy and sensitive for some reason.

I narrow my eyes and study the bruise on the side of my neck. I stare at it in the mirror, brushing my finger against the reddish-purple shades of my skin. After yesterday, all I needed was to fall asleep in someone’s warm embrace. Instead, I had to spend the night in bed alone.

Work is work , I remind myself. Sometimes we all have to do things that aren’t convenient. Selfishly wanting Jasper here with me means nothing in the grand scheme.

My eyes move up, and so does my finger, touching the ugly, cracked corner of my mouth. That arrogant prick nearly dislocated my jaw. I remember his grating voice and feel his breath on my ear, exactly like when he whispered into it yesterday. There are more marks across my body. No amount of showers or nice smelling scrubs can remove them. They are there for all to see.

I stare blankly into my reflection in the mirror, letting the dull pain spread through me.

Just one delicious hit could make it all go away right now. Make me feel nothing and more than I can comprehend at the same time. A high worth ten orgasms amid my heat. Sweeter and truer.

Frowning, I shut my eyes tightly and press my lips together.

Stop. Not this. You don’t need this.

Not anymore. Not ever.

I have to do something to prevent myself from slipping down that dangerous slide, so I get up. Seconds later, I hear the entrance lock click. My heart swells and gallops. Smiling, I hurry to the door, where Jasper’s just getting in.

“Morning, babe,” I rejoice, attacking him with a kiss and hug. Jasper kisses me back, sliding his hand into my hair. I feel him smile against my skin. “You’re late,” I whisper. As I press my nose into his cheek, I smell it. A scent that isn’t his. This one is unfamiliar, reeking of peonies.

He notices the way I falter before I pull away. “Come on,” he whispers, holding my head so I can’t move further. Jasper’s bright blue eyes hypnotize me, together with the pheromones that he releases. “I had to deal with someone, and this was the most effective method. You know that.”

I look down at his neck, wondering if some woman’s lips lapped at it…how long ago? An hour? Two hours? All night?

Swallowing, I force myself to take a deep breath and push it aside. I’m fine with it. I have to be fine with it. It’s work. Just like my work is work. Jasper isn’t mine to control or hold back, as much as I am not his.

We pull away from each other. “How about we watch that movie I told you about, huh? I see you made breakfast. Smells good,” he says, still holding my hand softly. The way he smiles at me, tender and thankful, makes me feel loved.

I don’t give a crap about his movie, but I want to relax on the couch together and be close, so I give him a quick peck before backing into the kitchen.

“I’ll bring it. Go sit.”

Jasper drops his stuff on the side table and strolls into the living room. “You take care of me so well, don’t you?” I hear him sit down with a sigh while I heat the bacon and eggs. “By the way, Christian Price was very satisfied with your efforts. It looks like your stellar performance was the final push he needed to agree on that deal with us. Well done as always, doll.”

I pause, feeling my mouth go dry.

I don’t want to think about him. Not now. “Oh? Good,” I mutter, quickly turning my attention back to the food. Food, bring food to Jasper. Relax together. Jasper and I, no one else. “Let’s not talk about work,” I say, trying to hold my voice steady when bringing him his plate.

Jasper sits on the couch with his arms spread out across the back of it and legs set wide, smirking at me. He seems happy and content, so I put the plate down and sit next to him.

“Go on. I already ate.”

He wraps his hand around my waist and pulls me in, pressing our lips together. “Thank you,” he whispers before kissing me properly, deeply. He does that thing with his tongue that I like, so I let my body fall limper, melting into him. No matter the remainders of someone else’s smell, Jasper’s muscular form is warm against me, and the scent of fresh ocean air overtakes my senses.

I expect him to start eating, but instead, his hand drifts further down, sliding under the fabric of my boxers.

A wave of aversion slithers across me.

“This isn’t what I had in mind,” I whisper hesitantly.

His pheromones grow stronger, filling my chest as I breathe in. Gently, he rubs his palms against my upper thigh and leans in again, kissing my cheek. “I’ll eat after. But first…didn’t you miss me? I’ve missed you very much.” Jasper’s lips move down to my neck, then my collarbone. Unlike the men who left those marks on me, who pushed and pulled me all night yesterday, he’s gentle. So gentle I want to cry.

I know I should give him this. I did miss him, too.

Nodding, I let him push me back against the couch and watch his lustful expression while he pulls my robe off my shoulders. With hands that held someone else and lips that kissed another, he caresses and tastes and claims my body again, at least erasing the shadows of those who weren’t him.

This is a blessing. This is the best I can hope for in this life, even if it isn’t perfect.

As Jasper looms above me, I empty my mind.

Somehow, I blink and find myself back in the Dollhouse. Feeling strangely hazy and out of it, I glance around. The going is slow this evening. I’m blanking on what I did the past few hours, but it wouldn’t be the first time that had happened.

I run my eyes across the room. Sadie is on the stage, getting humiliated by some poor fool who thinks he will break her. To his dismay, or perhaps arousal, she’s clearly enjoying everything he’s doing. I’m glad at least someone can get the best out of all of this.

Looking further, I notice Daya chatting up two of Jasper’s men. Kobe is one of them. Finally, my mind sharpens with interest. They all seem to be just wasting time—she giggles at something, throwing her ponytail around as she twists and turns playfully. Daya is nowhere near ditsy, but she plays the role of a flirty, ditsy baby girl pretty well.

When she steps toward Kobe after he says something and touches his chest, laughing, it looks completely natural and smooth. Kobe meets her eyes, smiling in a way I haven’t seen him do before.

A ping of discomfort slashes through my chest.

Am I… Why am I feeling jealous right now?

With a frown, I lick my lips and face away. What the hell is wrong with me? The boredom must be melting my brain.

I decide that getting a drink would only benefit me, so I turn to the bar. Unfortunately, a certain somebody is already heading in the same direction. The sound of heels clacking against the floor pulls my attention toward the female patron walking through the room, and she’s looking right at me.

I can tell someone is an alpha by their gait alone, and she definitely is. Tall, with wide shoulders, but still very feminine in her short dress and a formal jacket, the woman of about twice my age has her eyes set on me with a scary intensity. I’ve seen her around before, but never had her as a client.

Guess that’s going to change. Forcing a smile, I seductively lean against the bar and wait for her.

“Hello there, darling,” she speaks in a dignifying, polite sort of voice. The deepness of it is what gives it the edge some might find quite attractive.

“Evening,” I say in a honeyed tone, glancing up and down her body. Alphas love it when omegas glare at them as if they are the best thing on god’s green earth. She’s emitting pheromones already, making it very clear that’s exactly what she wants. They’re unusually strong and crisp. She smells like caramel and oak wood, an uncommon but not entirely unpleasant combination. “What can I help you with?”

The woman strolls up to me, pursing her plump lips before smiling. “I spoke to your lovely handler back there…” She pauses and points. When I glance toward the front door, Rya’s waiting there and nods firmly to confirm. My toes curl in frustration, but I give none of it away on my face. “She said you’re exactly what a girl in need such as myself might want.”

Ugh. She knows damn well I don’t like women. Why did it have to be me?

“Oh?” I raise a brow, meeting her eyes boldly. This is a game. I can pretend with her just as I do with everybody else. Slowly, I move my hand on the bar toward her and touch her arm. The way her pheromones pour out is a response clear enough—what I’m doing is working.

“And this girl here is very much in need,” she whispers, moving closer until she stands right against me, looking down from the few inches of heels and extra height she has on me.

“Then follow me,” I say, taking her hand. If only I had that drink.

Once we get into one of the private booths, it becomes apparent that the reason her pheromones are so strong is because she’s in rut. I don’t know if it’s that or the difficulty of the past few days that makes it harder than usual for me to pretend, but I do anyway, because she paid to enjoy herself, and my job is to please her.

We make out and undress, with her taking charge right away. Her kisses are hungry and rough, and her pheromones fill the room to the brim.

I try to let myself be subdued by them, to surrender to the pleasure.

She whispers sweet nothings into my ears, and I moan in response as my mind slips again. I wonder about who she is and what made her come here. Her light brown skin blends into the color of the beige sheets as I stare at her hands wrapping over mine. My vision blurs and my breath hitches once she enters me.

I don’t even know her name. In a way, she’s no different from the men yesterday. Only with a little more talking. As if that’s supposed to matter.

“Moan for me more,” she begs. Jasper’s exact words from the morning echo through my mind, sending those uncomfortable tingles through my limbs. It is like my soul is trying to exit my body, pushing out against my pores, but it can’t.

I bite my lip, attempting to focus, but her pheromones keep getting stronger. Alpha in a rut…is not something an omega wants to encounter when it’s not someone they trust.

Push through. You need to make her happy.

In an attempt to speed this up, I release some of my scent and tilt my pelvis, allowing her even deeper access. She tugs at my pierced nipples while her breasts brush against my back. Her kisses turn into light bites across my shoulder blades.

I want it to be over.

“That’s it,” I hear the echoes of her voice, muffled by my pounding heart. “You’re mine, aren’t you?”

With a gasp, I widen my eyes at the sudden pressure shooting through my insides. Oh no. Not this. Uncontrollable panic pours into me, getting into every nook and crevice. No matter how much I want to control it or fight it, it’s too strong. As she knots me, I unintentionally tighten around her, creating more pain. It’s like all I can perceive is her pheromones. Nothing else exists, only her and the grip she has on me. I desperately try to draw a breath, to claw against that suffocating cloud surrounding me, but it’s useless.

Not like this. I don’t like this. I don’t want this!

I press my lips together and shake my head, suppressing the tears welling up in my eyes. She didn’t even say anything.

You should have known.

She should’ve warned me.

You have to handle this.

It keeps going. The pressure. The waves of her scent consuming my mind and my body. I can’t breathe.

It will be over soon.

I end up on my face, trembling and taking sharp, heavy breaths against the pillow. My entire being’s on fire—tender and sore and so damn sensitive to the touch. So when she brushes her hand against the bottom of my back, I tense up and twitch.

The point of no return is slowly building up inside me. There’s nothing I can do to stop it. The chills, the tingling in the tips of my fingers, my heart palpitating… I can’t be like this in front of a client.

I manage to push myself up on all fours and roll out of the bed. With my head dizzy, I barely grab my clothes and throw them over myself before rushing out of the room. I hear something behind me; her baffled words of confusion, probably.

At this point, she no longer exists to me.

Working with only a narrow tunnel vision, I somehow make it into the backroom and the toilet. I nearly slip as I shove open the door, landing on my knees. Hyperventilating, I wrap my trembling fingers against the toilet bowl, hovering above it.

What the fuck is wrong with you?!

I shake my head in frustration, suppressing the urge to scream. Instead, tears roll down my eyes, making me feel even more weak and disgusting. My throat plays games on me—closing up to the point I can barely draw breath and then constricting so violently I expect to throw up, but nothing comes out. As I spiral into the vortex of panic and anger and soul-crushing dread, Jasper’s face appears in my mind.

I need him. I need him to hold me and help me.

My phone is in my drawer. I turn my head to the door and consider getting it before remembering our talk in the morning. He’s negotiating with those people. I can’t do that, can I? Interrupting him at a meeting. His pathetic, blubbering omega begging him to come to soothe him like a stupid child because he can’t handle his job. The oldest, most basic job in the history of humankind.

My bottom lip quivers as I lean over the toilet again, shaking. I doubt I could even stand up, anyway. My legs are numb, and all I can feel besides the incessant pounding of my heart is something dripping out of me, running down my thigh.

Her seed. The results of what she did, what I…

I freeze when I hear a door open. Someone is calling out. Then it closes and heavy, hurried steps approach me. “Apollo.”

I turn around, sliding down the side of the toilet.

Kobe stands at the threshold, the bright light shining behind his head, obstructing his face until he quickly gets on his knees in front of me. His expression is full of concern. His brown eyes dart across the pathetic sight I must be, and bushy brows twist in pity.

“Wh-what ar-are you doing here?” I mutter, trying to keep some semblance of dignity.

This is the backroom. He shouldn’t be here.

“No one else was here and— I heard the alpha outside complain about you stumbling off right after she…” He pauses and jerks his head to the side. Is what flashes over his face disgust? When he faces me again, his expression is even gentler. “She just knotted you without a warning, didn’t she? I’m so sorry, Apollo.”

His hand touches mine and suddenly, warmth radiates against my freezing skin. It’s like he breaks some sort of spell I’ve been under. I feel my heart ease and the tingling in my fingers subside. The way he looks at me, the way he speaks…it says he understands.

Kobe understands.

He’s an omega. He knows how panic-inducing it can be to be knotted. Especially like this. Unprepared. Unwilling. I might get shouted at by the handler later for creating a disgruntled customer or not providing the service I’m supposed to, but right now, in front of Kobe, there’s no judgment. Because he knows.

I relax my entire body with a deep sigh that releases so much inner strain I want to cry. Glancing at my hand, he quickly pulls his away and blinks. “What she did was fucked. Do you…do you need anything?”

I’m still dazed and sluggish, weak, but the fear is gone. As I look up at him, waiting for my response intently with those big brown eyes, suddenly I crave a cigarette.

“I could use a smoke break,” I whisper, tightening my grip on the toilet to try to get up. Kobe smiles and extends his open hand out.