Page 35 of The Alien Who Saved Christmas

Deck the halls for human women,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!

Make one happy, then you’re winnin’,

Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!

From “Deck the Halls for Human Women”

A Christmas Carol for Non-Earthlings by Sadie1

Six Months Later

“I have examined my heart.” Xane told his wife. “I completed the analysis long ago, but I waited to tell you my findings, so you would know I undertook the endeavor in earnest.”

It was a warm night, but a breeze blew through the window, cooling off the interior of the bedroom. The distant sounds of music and celebration drifted from the castle, but Xane preferred the quiet of his own land.

With the credits Sadie had won at that casino (and the shocking amount of money that recordings of her strange Christmas carols generated), they were the wealthiest people on the planet.

Her music was spreading around the universe so quickly he’d even heard a Tibollu humming about “Holly Jolly Quasars.” And Tibollus didn’t have tongues, vocal chords, or ears.

With all the extra income, Sadie and Xane had hired plenty of help for the ranch. The animals were thriving, and they’d added some crops, which reminded Sadie of her grandsire’s farm.

As he feared, they had not been able to plant “birds,” though.

No species he consulted with could get him the proper seeds.

But Sadie assured him the fields of blue wheat were just as satisfying as her grandsire’s turkey crops.

Xane had to agree that the ranch was all he’d dreamed it would be.

He found working on their land quite fulfilling and peaceful.

His sleepy wife was sprawled over his chest. He found that even more fulfilling and peaceful. He wanted to tell her everything that was in his heart.

Sadie didn’t seem interested in an analysis of his feelings, though. “Hmmm?” She got out, in drowsy unconcern. She was tousled and flushed from their lovemaking. No one had ever been more beautiful.

They lay together on the bed, two of his arms wrapped around her naked body, while his other two hands played with her remarkable brown hair.

They had had a busy day, as Sadie led the Rtaharions through their very first 4 th of July celebration.

The festivities related to Sadie’s “fourth favorite holiday” made little sense to Xane, but he’d enjoyed the meat cooked over an open fire and the fireworks displays that the armory had put on.

And he really enjoyed making his wife happy.

She adored holidays and was always coming up with some new one the Rtaharions had to add to the calendar.

All day, she’d run around merrily coercing the kingdom to celebrate.

“I said I’ve examined my heart.” Xane repeated patiently. “You said that must happen, before someone is sure their caring feelings have grown and deepened to love. I have been committed to doing things properly, so you would be confident in my findings.”

Sadie lifted her face to meet his eyes, more awake. The 1 Medallion gleamed around her neck. She never took it off. “And what’s your conclusion?” Her smile said she already knew the answer.

Xane’s own mouth curved in response. “That I am very in love with you.” He confirmed. “Forever, Sadie.”

“Good.” Her gray eyes sparkled with delight, fully confident in his emotions. “I love you, too. You’re the only man who makes my heart go boom. ”

Xane believed that. It had taken him a while, but he no longer feared Sadie would trade him for another husband. She showed him her love every day. No one could miss it.

Her obvious preference for Xane over all other males had frustrated the rest of the Rtaharions, at first. But even they had slowly accepted that she would stay his wife forever. Now, no one even tried to steal her away.

Not that they had much opportunity to make an attempt.

Xane never let Sadie out of his sight, if he could possibly help it.

And when he was forced to momentarily leave her side, Hathgarr was there.

The Ravaging Death King was viciously protective of his sister-in-law.

It was amazing to behold his formidable brother rearrange the proud traditions of a warrior planet to accommodate the feelings of a tiny female.

Sadie idly mused that Earth princesses got tiaras? The royal treasury was raided for the brightest gems to make her a crown.

Sadie wished for “chocolate brownies”? The royal cooks were ordered to somehow turn leegos into a cake-like dessert. Now .

Sadie missed human “movies?” The royal bards were ordered to memorize all the stories she related and perform them as plays.

To be fair, the plays were very popular with the Rtaharions.

They weren’t a creative people, so Sadie’s stories were a revelation to them.

Aliens had been an especially big hit. Even Hathgarr had laughed at the comedic hijinks of the pitiful human males being devoured.

But at the end, when the beloved alien mother heroically died defending her young, the hardened men in the audience wept.

It was a dramatic masterpiece. Everyone agreed.

And if they didn’t, they were wise enough to keep their mouths shut.

The new princess cheerily ruled the Rtaharion court.

Nobody needed to look at the 1 Medallion to know she was the most important part of the royal family.

Xane and Hathgarr made it obvious to all.

If Sadie ever complained that the two suns were too bright, Hathgarr would probably order them pulled from the sky, and no one else would dare to protest the dark.

Just as no one ridiculed Xane, for choosing ranching with his bride over military campaigns.

Sadie had changed everything for the Rtaharions.

Perhaps for the rest of the universe, too. News of Xane’s beautiful, loyal wife had spread through all known galaxies like a nova blast. Males of every species were now interested in acquiring humans of their own.

Fanatically interested.

There was official, interplanetary concern that more Earth women would be stolen by desperate males. Some might already be held against their will. That possibility was highly bothersome to Sadie and to diplomats. It was less worrying to the rank-and-file males who wanted devoted, smiling wives.

Xane was a pragmatic man. More human women would be snatched up, sooner or later.

A treasure did not sit untouched, once there was a map leading to it.

When more humans were inevitably found, and then inevitably rescued from their kidnappers by Hathgarr’s army, the Rtaharions had already offered them safe harbor.

Every male on the planet was eager to open their homes to new females.

Fanatically eager.

Hathgarr told the kings of the other planets that the arrangements made perfect sense.

The Rtaharions were the only race who possessed a human, after all.

And anyone could tell that Sadie thrived with them.

Surely other humans would, too. They might be a warlike planet, despised by most of the civilized worlds, but Rtaharions had a gift for making small humans content.

They were certain of it. They all wanted to follow Xane’s example as doting husbands.

Fanatically doting.

Of course, the other Rtaharion males were in for a disappointment, if they hoped their women would be as wonderful as Sadie. Xane gently trailed his claws up and down her smooth back. The Fating Gods had blessed him with a one-in-a-million wife. No one else could ever be so lucky.

Sadie stacked her hands on his chest, so she could smile into his eyes. “Do you still worry that caring is Weakness?” She asked in a teasing tone.

“Of course not. Caring is Strength . I have always said this.”

She arched a skeptical brow. “That’s the story you’re going with, huh?”

Xane grunted. “Well… I did not always say the words that said it.” He grudgingly admitted. “But for a Rtaharion, actions are always paramount. And my actions proved the Strength of my emotions, from the moment we met.”

“I suppose that’s maybe-true.”

“ Definitely -true.” He kissed her. “From the minute we met, I have been doing very stupid things to keep you with me. Because you are my first, last, and only love, wife.”

Sadie smiled against his lips. “Yeah, I totally bought the right alien.”