Page 40

Jamie

I slam on the brakes and lurch from the car. Gulls cry, and the frigid river breeze numbs my throat as I run. Please let me be in time. Please! My lungs ache by the time I’m at the marina. He has to be here. There’s no way anyone would let a little boy just get a boat and sail away.

“But I have money!” a familiar voice protests.

My heart skips as I whirl around. Jace stands in front of a ticket booth, holding up a handful of cash.

“Sorry. No unaccompanied children are allowed on board any of our tours,” the ticket-taker says kindly but firmly.

“Jace!” I snap, both angry and relieved as I rush up to him.

At the crack of my voice, Jace winces, his shoulders hunching up to his ears. “Uh-oh…”

“Yeah. ‘Uh-oh.’” Grabbing his wrist on his uninjured side, I tug him away from the booth and toward the car. “What were you thinking?” I snap once we’re out of earshot of the lady in the booth.

Jace’s cheeks flush. “I was trying to find Anders.” His bottom lip wobbles. “You guys need to make up. You have to.”

My heart clenches. “I will.”

“Why did you two fight? Was it because of me?”

I can’t tear my gaze away from his cast, can’t let go of my guilt because if I’d just been there, Jace might not have gotten hurt.

I was so focused on myself, lost in the love I’d found with Anders, that I’d forgotten about the promise I’d made to my parents.

“No. I was the one at fault.” I swallow hard and kneel, gripping his shoulders.

“I promised Mom and Dad I’d look after you, and I failed.

I felt like if I’d been there instead of out with Anders, I could have helped you.

I used my guilt as an excuse to push Anders away.

I’m sorry if you felt like you were responsible. ”

“We were finally a family again. You, me, and Anders. Do you… do you think Mom and Dad would be mad about that? Or sad? Like they think we’ve forgotten about them?”

I shake my head frantically. “No. No, of course not.”

Jace nods his agreement, making a determined fist at his side. “They always said they wanted us to be happy. Remember?”

That’s true. When I’d come out as gay to them, they’d both embraced me and told me that all that mattered was that I found someone who made me happy. And Anders didn’t just make me happy. Anders was my happiness.

“I do, but…” When my throat closes, speaking becomes difficult. “I was driving when they were killed. It’s m-my fault they’re gone.” Tears spill down my cheeks, and I hang my head so he can’t see. “I don’t deserve to be happy. Not when I took them from us.”

Jace puts his arm around my shoulders “It wasn’t your fault,” Jace says, voice shaking but full of sincerity that only makes me cry harder. “It was an accident. The doctors said so. Grandma said so. Mom and Dad would too, right?”

Hiccupping, I nod into his shoulder.

“Mom and Dad wouldn’t blame you. I know they wouldn’t.”

“Do you?” I choke out the words, suddenly feeling sick with fear. “Do you hate me, Jace? Do you blame me?”

Jace’s hesitation makes more tears fall. Of course he does. How could he not? I’d feel the same if I were in his shoes.

“Why would you think that?” Jace sounds just as upset as I feel.

“I… I took our parents away from you. I got to spend more time with them than you did. How could you not hate me?”

Sniffling, Jace hugs me tighter. “I don’t!” His little body shakes, and I hold him to me. “I never could. I’m—I’m so, so happy you survived. That we h-have each other.”

Jace doesn’t blame me. He doesn’t hate me.

My little brother’s happy I survived, and I am too, because that means I can be there for him.

For the first time in so long, I feel like I can breathe.

I hold my little brother tighter as we both cry like the lost, broken boys we are.

“We do have each other. Always will. I promise.”

“So let’s be happy. With Anders. Please?”

Chuckling, I ruffle his hair. “When did you get smarter than your big bro, huh?”

“I’ve always been smarter, duh!” He laughs and shoves me away. “Oh, wait! Here.” He hands me Gran’s necklace. “Sorry I took it. I thought maybe he went back to the past, so I wanted to go and see if I could find him.”

I give him a look. “You shouldn’t have taken it, and you definitely shouldn’t have run off without telling me. You scared me.”

“I know. Sorry.” He huffs and hangs his head.

“But that’s a great idea you had, Jace. I’ll search there.” Hopefully, I won’t get eaten by territorial ulfhednar…

“Take some pictures of all the Vikings, okay?”

Grinning, I take the necklace. “You got it.” Gripping his shoulders, I turn him toward the car. I’ve got to get him home, but as soon as I can, I’m getting Anders back and reminding him of where he belongs.

With me for the rest of our lives.

I don’t know why I expected going through a portal to be, like…

I don’t know, as simple as walking through a doorway.

It’s not. My stomach lurches like I fell down a staircase as the boat soars through the portal and lands with a splash in a vast ocean.

It’s way colder than in the present, and frigid waterdrops spatter my clothes.

The boat rocks violently as the waves swell beneath me.

Gulls cry overhead, and a light snow is falling from the gray clouds.

Ahead of me, a vast island awaits. I sure hope it’s Anders’s home and not an island full of cannibals or something.

Not sure an island full of werewolves is much better, though.

Clutching the oars, I paddle until my shoulders begin to burn.

Finally, rocks scrape the bottom of the boat.

I jump out and drag it the rest of the way up the rocky shore.

A pine forest unfurls around me. For a moment, I’m unsure where to go until I notice multiple sets of footprints leading away from the shore in the light snow on the ground.

I take in a fortifying breath and lift my head high. Here goes. Time to win back my mate.

Gathering my courage, I set off into the woods.

The double set of footprints twists and turns for a bit before a road marred by wagon wheels, hoofprints, and boot prints materializes.

It isn’t long before the trees thin and the ground slopes, revealing a village below the hill.

Wow. If I hadn’t already known I’d gone back in time, I would have believed it now.

The houses are so rudimentary they couldn’t have come from anywhere but the past.

My eyes snag on two figures standing outside the village.

One has got to be ulfhednar; he’s enormous, tall as hell with bulging muscles and black hair shaved at the sides with a long, braided beard.

There are gray furs slung over his wide shoulders.

He looks so similar to Anders that my heart skips, but there’s something off about him.

Maybe it’s the curl of his fangs or the tapping of his claws at his sides. He seems more wolf than man.

And the guy beside him can only be Arlo, that guy who approached me in the bookshop and asked about Anders. Although his outfit is totally weird. He’s wearing a black cloak adorned with raven feathers. It’s pretty striking.

When I’m close enough, both men turn their heads. “Arlo!” My voice echoes for what seems like miles.

Arlo’s eyes widen in recognition. “Goodness! Looks like Ulfheim is open for tourists, huh?”

The man I assume is Anders’s brother glares at me. “You’re ulfhednar. I can smell it. But I don’t recognize you.”

Raising both hands placatingly, I say, “I’m Anders’s mate. Is he here? I need to speak with him.”

Arlo goes to speak, but Anders’s brother snaps, “You do not bear his mark! You will not have entry.”

“Hold on, Guthark.”

“Gunnar,” the bear of a man says.

Arlo gives him a pinched smile. “Sorry. I’m a bit distracted by your rugged good looks. This is Anders’s mate.”

Gunnar shoots him a narrowed look. “I don’t like this, but my brother needs help now . Otherwise, you’d both be thrown out on your asses for daring to trespass.”

Fear leaves a sour taste in my throat. “Is he okay?”

Gunnar shakes his head. “Follow me.” He jerks a shoulder, motioning for us to follow, then breaks into a jog.

“I’ll be right behind you, enjoying the view!” Arlo singsongs, and a growl rumbles from Gunnar. A roar echoes over the trees, and my wolf howls within my soul. I need to hurry, now! Anders is in trouble. I’ve got to get to him.

The cold has numbed my throat by the time we arrive outside a big longhouse.

Gunnar motions us onward, leading us past the house and into the woodlands beyond.

Another roar shakes the forest down to the roots.

It’s the most furious sound, and a whimper crawls up my throat.

Something is wrong with Anders. Voices get louder and louder, and through the trees, three figures come into view.

Two are men, both huge and blond and clad in wolf furs.

The other is an older woman, also wearing furs.

They’re restraining a beast so hideous, so terrifying, it freezes me in my tracks.

My heart sinks like a cold stone into my stomach as primal fear paralyzes me.

The beast is a hideous conjoining of man and wolf as it towers on two muscular back legs, tail lashing at the air.

With a swipe of an enormous, clawed hand, it bowls the older woman off her feet.

“Helga!” one of the men shouts, fear in his voice.

“Lyall, focus!” booms the other one. “Keep him restrained!”

Gunnar. Lyall. Then the big blond man must be…

Wulfric goes flying, back smashing against a tree. I’m not sure what cracks, the trunk or his spine.

“Anders, please, stop!” Lyall screams, clutching at Anders’s huge black-furred arm.

That thing is… Anders? Oh god. What’s happened to him? As the beast throws back its head and roars, making my ears ring, blazing green eyes set their sights on me. Eyes so familiar, I can’t deny the truth.

I’m too late.

Anders has become a monster, and I don’t know how I can get him back.