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O n that first day of school my sophomore year, I almost didn’t recognize my friend Zack at first. In fact, the only reason why I knew it was him was because Braden looked almost exactly the same way as he had when we’d parted ways last May.

Zack, though…he was taller, by several inches.

More than that, though, was how his face had changed.

We hadn’t chatted face-to-face after we’d started exchanging music links back in June, and now what I saw floored me.

Gone were the glasses, making it easier to appreciate the sharp definition of his face, and his emerald green eyes seemed sharper.

His full lips were more pronounced without the eyewear.

But it was hard to see his face at all, because he’d been growing his hair out all summer, from what I could tell.

Inspired by the long hair of many a metal musician, perhaps?

“Hey, guys,” I said, walking into the sophomore hallway section of our school.

It was crowded and noisy there, but I’d spotted Braden quickly.

Still no sign of Ava, and I was okay with that.

As I admired Zack’s new look, I couldn’t hide the surprise in my eyes, but I couldn’t find the nerve to comment, afraid it might give away my deepening feelings for my friend.

Instead, I stuck to neutral territory. “All ready for another year in school?”

“Hell, no,” Zack said, tucking a piece of hair behind his ear, “but at least we only have three more years in our sentence.” Whoa. His voice was a little deeper, too. I liked it. “Good to see you.”

“You, too.” That was as close as we’d get to saying we’d missed each other.

What I wasn’t going to say to him was how good he looked.

I’d always seen Zack’s latent cuteness underneath the glasses but it was unavoidable now.

To think I’d eyed guys off and on as a freshman and dreamed about this one or that, wondering so many silly things, like when I’d get my first kiss, who would be the first boy to put an arm around me, or when someone would invite me to a school dance—and here he was, my best male friend, actually looking better than I’d remembered.

Now I wanted him to be all my firsts.

“Something’s different about you,” Braden said to me , throwing me completely off guard.

At first, I thought, Oh, my God , thinking he could tell I’d finally started my period.

But, of course, that wasn’t it. I’d had to switch to a larger cup size, a C, over the summer—and my hair had grown, too.

Plus I’d been outside a lot, so I had a nice tan.

I hoped it was the tan and not my breasts he’d noticed.

The warning bell rang, another reminder of why riding the bus was a pain, because I hardly had any time to talk to my friends before school started.

When the weather grew bad, we’d sometimes even be late for classes.

Those tardies would be excused, but it didn’t change the fact that we’d missed important information that teachers couldn’t wait to deliver. “You have lunch plans?” Zack asked.

As a matter of fact…my usual lunch date was nowhere to be fo und—and I’d love nothing more than to hang with these guys. “I was just gonna go to the cafeteria.”

“Meet us back here when you get out of class.”

Nodding, I tried not to look overly excited about it, but I was. Everything I’d dreamed of my freshman year seemed to be coming true during the second.

I rushed to my locker, managing to get it open on the first try, and threw everything but a notebook and pencil into it. I wasn’t as worried about getting to class on time as I had been a year ago, because I had the advantage this year of familiarity with the campus.

As I sat in Spanish class reviewing verb conjugation and common nouns, I thought of Zack in band and Braden in weightlifting.

Unless they’d changed their schedules over the summer, they were in those classes right this second.

My Spanish teacher was the same guy I’d had the year before and in the same classroom, so at least there was familiarity.

But something I’d forgotten to do a week ago was compare completed schedules with Zack and Braden.

We’d painstakingly plotted out what classes we wanted to take last spring but hadn’t discussed it now.

So when I found a seat in my second block class, Health and Wellness, I was surprised and thrilled to see Zack come through the door.

I waved at him and loved his easy grin as he made his way over to me.

Instead of sitting down, though, he gave a nod of his head and said, “Let’s sit back there. ”

Gathering up my things, I followed him to the last desks near the rear wall.

I should have known Zack would be a back-of-the-room kind of guy.

While he didn’t seem disengaged from learning or even the environment, he seemed done with school—and that was a shame, considering we had three years left.

But being in the back of the room was better than not being there at all—and someone had to sit there, right?

Despite not sitting at the front or even the middle of the classroom, we paid attention and even learned something in our first class. The teacher was funny and engaging, helpful early in the morning. But inside I was thrilled to be doing it with my new best friend.

The day got better, though, because the non-honors English class I’d been assigned to also had Zack—and Braden. We all sat together, but this time, Zack was okay sitting in the middle of the room, so long as we were near the outer wall by the windows.

When we went to lunch, I marveled that I still hadn’t seen Ava once.

A small part of me mourned that friendship, because she and I had been together since elementary school, surviving the nastiness of middle school thanks to a solid sisterhood, and even though I’d wanted some independence and freedom to choose the things I desired, I hadn’t necessarily needed our relationship to simply end.

And so unceremoniously…like none of it had ever mattered.

Maybe it hadn’t. The friendship I felt with Zack (and Braden) was easy and natural. Nothing about it ever felt forced, and Zack didn’t try to control or manipulate me like my old best friend had on a regular basis. I just had to adjust to not being in that cage.

Standing in line at lunch, Zack said, “I don’t know why we’re doing this. The cafeteria’s not going to taste better this year.”

Braden frowned, looking around the cavernous room as kids carried trays to tables, filling chairs one at a time. “I don’t know what you expect us to do.”

“I heard the schools in Pueblo have open campus. We should demand Dalton do that, too.”

I asked, “What’s open campus?”

Braden’s eyes focused on me. “It’s where you can leave the school grounds for lunch if you want.” Looking at Zack, he said, “I don’t know if that’s true about Pueblo. ”

“Still. Wouldn’t it be fucking cool if we could go to Benny’s for lunch?

” I felt my lips spread in a grin. I’d been to Benny’s Diner once or twice with my mom.

While I couldn’t remember anything spectacular about the cheeseburger and fries, I could recall the chocolate cream pie being the best I’d ever had.

And the food was better than a TV dinner.

I didn’t mind the cafeteria food so much. It gave me the opportunity to eat foods my mom never made. “Sure, but it’s not so bad.”

“Yeah, if it won’t kill ya.” Although he’d framed his statement as a joke, I could tell he meant it.

“Seriously, Zack. Is it that bad?”

His eyes shifted from the front of the line to me. “Maybe I’m a little spoiled. My mom usually works an early shift, so she makes a great homecooked meal every night.”

Braden voiced what I was thinking. “Lucky bastard.”

“Maybe you guys should take Culinary Arts next year. Then you’ll know what I mean about this shit.”

Once we’d finally made it to the part of the line where we could grab our trays, I noticed something had changed from last year. “Hey, this should make you happy. Now we get a choice.”

“Big deal. That’s like choosing between dog shit and cat shit.” Braden rolled his eyes as if he’d heard this argument many a time. Then Zack raised his voice, acting hoity-toity. “How do I ever choose between ravioli and a cheese quesadilla?”

“Well, at least you know the quesadilla didn’t come from a can?” In all fairness, though, at that tender age, I didn’t mind canned ravioli. It wasn’t until much later that I understood why Zack’s palate wasn’t a fan.

“You think a mere quesadilla will fill me up? How’m I supposed to become a man?”

I laughed. “Maybe from the garden salad and milk? ”

He shook his head. “You’re gonna keep arguing with me, aren’t you?”

“Yep,” I said, setting my tray on the metal surface in front of me so I could slide it toward the serving line.

“You could’ve brought a brown bag lunch today.

You’ve done it before, so it’s not like you don’t have what you need or don’t know how.

But you didn’t. You put money on your lunch account and here you are.

If you hated it so much, you should have planned and brought different food. ”

Zack, still feigning a concerned student, looked at Braden and said, “Ooh. She’s good. And I don’t have a good answer for that.”

Soon we were sitting at a table, eating food without complaint despite our earlier exchange.

It was then that I finally spied Ava in the line wearing a cheer uniform.

While she might have been right that I would have needed to lose weight to look good in that outfit, I couldn’t help but notice that her thighs looked chunky.

But nobody asked me what I thought.

And why was I being so judgmental? Had Ava rubbed off on me…or was I feeling a little jealous on some level?