Page 4 of Racing Dirty Trilogy Box Set

Izabella

Present

I’m jolted awake, my heart pounding, sweat trickling down my brow. I groan and roll over, staring up at the white ceiling, the remnants of the dream still clinging to my mind. Why do these dreams keep coming back?

I blink the sleep from my eyes and glance at the alarm clock on the nightstand.

Six o’clock. The sun will set soon. I sit up, the room still dimly lit, and notice Ashley on her bed.

Her headphones are in, her blonde hair bobbing as she nods along to whatever music she’s listening to while studying a creative arts book. She glances up when she sees me moving.

“Hey, are you okay?” Ashley asks, pulling an earbud out and looking at me with concern.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I force a smile, though it feels hollow. “I just need to go for a walk. It’s Friday night, I need the beach.”

Ashley nods, her blonde hair slipping free from her messy bun. “Alright, take care of yourself.”

Every Friday night, without fail, I go to the beach.

It’s been my ritual since I moved here standing on the edge of the ocean, letting the waves crash against the shore.

It helps drown out the chaos in my mind, the constant noise from the track and everything else.

And the sunset, watching the sun dip below the horizon, always leaves me feeling a little lighter, like I can breathe again.

As I step out into the evening air, the salty breeze brushes against my bare legs, sending a shiver down my spine.

My mind, though, betrays me and flashes to Xavier, his hands drifting over my legs, his touch gentle, his lips hot against my skin as if he were worshipping me.

My body still remembers the heat, the urgency of it.

I shake my head, trying to push those thoughts away, and breathe in the salty air, grounding myself in the present.

The waves crash at my feet, the cold water rushing against my legs as I walk deeper, the ocean’s rhythm soothing my frazzled nerves.

The sun, hanging low in the sky, paints the horizon with colors that seem to sing their last song of the day.

The city hums in the distance, but here, by the ocean, I can hear the heartbeat of the world slow down.

It’s so different being here in L.A. than in Michigan.

The flatlands, the dirt roads, those always called to me on Friday nights, the smell of the earth in the air, the hum of excitement before a race, the way the lights would glimmer against the asphalt as I stood under them.

I should be there, defending my title, proving myself on the track, carving my name into the sport.

But instead, I ran away. I ran from everything that had ever mattered, heartbreak, love, and a friendship that’s now a ghost of what it once was.

I don’t realize how late it is until I notice the sky. The sunlight is bleeding into the night, the horizon a soft gradient of reds and purples.

I get lost in the colors, thinking about Xavier, his touch, his blue eyes, the way he looked at me, like I was something worth holding onto. But then the weight of what I left behind crashes into me, and I lose track of where I’m walking.

Suddenly, I slam into someone.

“Oh my God. I’m so sorry,” I blurt out, stepping back quickly to avoid falling.

“It’s OK.” A deep voice rumbles, steady and soothing, as strong arms catch me from falling. “I saw you out here alone and thought maybe you’d like some company.”

I tilt my head back, meeting sapphire eyes that shimmer like the ocean on a bright day.

But as I look into them, my mind flashes to another pair of blue eyes, Xavier’s, watching me with an intensity that both terrified and captivated me, like he was seeing through to my very soul.

I shake my head, trying to clear the memory.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t,” I manage to say, my breath unsteady. I pull myself from his hold, the lingering heat from his hands still on my skin.

I don’t give him a second glance as I turn and make my way back to my dorm room, each step feeling heavier than the last.

I open the door, expecting a quiet room, but instead, I find Ashley pacing back and forth, her fingers tugging anxiously at her bottom lip.

It's a telltale sign that she's troubled about something.

Her messy bun barely contains her blonde hair, and her sun-kissed skin is flushed, the color unnatural against her usual calm.

“Ash?” I approach slowly, wary of whatever has her so worked up. “Is everything OK?”

She halts her pacing and shifts to face me, her expression crumbling as tears pool in her soft brown eyes. My heart tightens in my chest as I rush over to her. “Ash, what’s wrong? You’re freaking me out.”

Without a word, she hands me my phone, her fingers trembling as they brush against mine.

“Call Mia. It’s about your dad.” Her voice is barely a whisper, but it slices through the room like a sharp blade.

I glance at the clock and the blood drains from my face. My feet seem to betray me, and before I know it, I’m sinking to the floor with a sickening thud.

“What about my dad?” I manage to ask, my mind spinning wildly. The time difference suddenly hits me like a ton of bricks, it’s 8 o’clock here, meaning it’s 11 back home. My dad should be racing right now. He’s in the middle of the feature.

My phone lights up, and Mia’s name flashes across the screen. My hands shake as I swipe the button and press the phone to my ear.

“Mia?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Oh! Thank God!” Her voice breaks through my racing thoughts. “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for twenty minutes. Izzy, it’s Austin. He’s being transported to the hospital. You need to come home now.”

The world seems to drop out from beneath me, and I hear the phone slip from my hand, clattering onto the floor. My body is numb, my mind frozen in shock. I can barely make out Ashley’s voice as she talks to Mia, but I can feel her arms wrapping around me, pulling me into a tight hug.

“Hey, it will be OK,” she tries to reassure me, but I can’t respond. I can’t feel anything.

After what feels like an eternity, I force myself to pull together. I stand up shakily, my hands trembling as I grab my suitcase from beneath my bed, tossing clothes into it with mechanical precision. Ashley is already on her phone, booking my flight, her voice a distant hum in the background.

“The first flight available leaves in three hours. Do you want me to go with you?” Ashley asks, her voice soft, but the question cuts through my fog.

I stop packing and turn to face her. “No, I’ll be OK. Thanks, Ash, but you have a lot going on with your crew. I can’t ask you to come with me. I need to get to my dad. Can you just drive me to the airport?”

Ashley gets up off the floor where we were sitting after confirming my flight and grabs her keys. “You wouldn’t be putting me out, Izzy. You’re one of my best friends and I’m here if you need me. I know going home will be hard on you. Just one phone call and I’ll be out there.”

“Thanks, Ash. I’m so grateful for you coming into my life.” I wipe a tear that escaped and sniff my nose. I pull her into a hug and then finish packing my bag. Minutes later we’re out the door, heading to the airport.

Ashley pulls into LAX Airport drop off an hour later and parks her car.

Even at midnight, traffic on the four-oh-one is excruciating.

I don’t know how Ashley can drive in this traffic.

I do, but that's her story to tell not mine. I’ll take my quiet little town driving over bumper to bumper any day.

Ashley drives like she’s in a street race, cutting people off and getting up over ninety miles an hour in her shiny Mercedes in the blink of an eye.

I’ve been texting Mia nonstop since we left our dorm room. But she hasn’t answered yet. I gave her my flight information and told her I would be landing in Freeland at three a.m. I hope she’ll be there.

“Here we go,” Ashley says, parking her Mercedes and getting out. I do the same. She offers me a bright smile trying to lift my sullen mood.

“Your flight leaves in two hours, so you better get going. The ticket counter has your reservation. Call me when you land. I don’t care what time it is."

She gives me a tender hug and hands me my bag. I hug her back and wipe a tear from my face.

“Thanks,” I respond, my throat choked with grief. “I would have been freaking out and still sitting on the floor if it weren’t for you. You’re a great friend, one of my best friends and I’m going to miss you.”

“If you need me at any time, I’ll be there. I always wanted to visit your hometown anyway,” she says wiping a tear from her eye.

“I might take you up on that, once I find out what is going on.” I hug her one last time and walk into the busy airport. I force my way through the crowd, get checked in at the ticket counter, and go through security.

I’m sitting in a hard plastic chair, my boarding ticket in hand, bag between my feet, and pull out my phone, waiting for the attendant to announce my flight. Still no answer from Mia.

I open my contacts and scroll down, my finger hovering over a name I haven’t used in five years, “X” is all it says.

I never even changed his picture of the two of us.

His arms wrapped around my waist, love showing in our eyes as his best friend, Nolan took this picture during the two blissful weeks we had together.

He stole my heart completely and a tear drops onto my phone, blurring my vision.

The attendant calls my flight as I type in a quick message to Xavier before I chicken out.

Me: X, I heard about my dad. I’m on my way home. I won’t bother you, but I didn’t want it to be a shock to see me around. My flight lands at three a.m. Mia should be there to pick me up. Xoxo-B.

I hit send and immediately power down my phone.

I have no clue why I felt Xavier needed to know, but somewhere deep inside I wanted to warn him so he’s not caught by surprise.

Deep down I know I want to see him. I still love him even after all these years and he is the only one who captured my heart and I never took it back.

I tell myself I won’t give in to him when I see him again, but I thought he should know I’m coming home.

Yeah, after five years I’m finally coming home.