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Maya

W hile I only got about six hours of sleep last night, once we got home and unpacked, Finley got plenty of sleep during the ride.

He was up bright and early, and I had to do the same since my orientation meeting is this morning. Bree, one of the high school girls from down the street, should be here any minute to stay with Finley.

I’m sitting on the steps of the porch on a blanket, wearing my navy pantsuit and freshly pressed, bright yellow top, watching Finley hit around the plastic ball with his hockey stick unenthusiastically.

He looks like I feel.

“Are you okay, buddy?”

He shrugs, giving me a sad little smile. “I miss…everybody.”

I nod in understanding. “I miss everybody, too.”

The house, the yard, the whole city feels like it’s emptier than it’s ever been before.

Standing up, I go grab one of the sticks propped up against the side of the house.

“I’ll play goalie until Bree gets here,” I offer.

“You’re not going to be any good at it.”

Scoffing, I get in position in front of the goal and tell him, “Try me. We’re going to take turns, see who can make the most shots out of five,” I tell him, causing his face to light up.

Getting a running start, Finley takes his first shot, sending the ball flying right between my legs.

He jumps up and down in celebration.

And while I love these moments alone with my son, we both know someone, two someones, are missing.

I’m so sick of missing them, especially Christian.

“Mommy, you’re wearing the Bobcats colors!”

I glance down, noticing the navy blue and yellow are the Greensboro team’s colors for the first time.

And the dress I chose to wear to Georgia was the same dark blue with yellow wedge sandals…It’s like I’ve been subconsciously dressing for Bobcat home games.

I really want to be in North Carolina for every single game.

Is this job, my independence, worth being apart from the man I love?

Is anything worth being apart?

It’s possible I could find a similar activities director's job in Greensboro. I think I’ve always known that and was just being stubborn, too afraid to take the chance. Being so close to Christian without being with him would be so damn hard. But living without him is even harder.

I wanted this move to be my decision alone. God knows getting kicked out of my parent’s house wasn’t my choice, nor was it my choice where Preston had to move to play hockey.

The only big decision I’ve made in six years was to have my son. The rest I conceded for him, for us.

But now, well, I’m ready to pack up and move. I’m ready to take that chance with Christian, to try to be a family.

Life is short. I don’t want to get a call anytime soon, losing someone I love and have any regrets.

Grabbing the ball, I toss it back to Finley who chases after it. While he’s bringing it back toward the goal using his stick, I ask him, “Do you think it would be worth it to leave this house, this yard, and your friends to go live in the same city as Christian and Uncle Preston?”

Finley’s head lifts, the ball forgotten. “I wish we could take this house and everything else with us.”

“Everything inside would come along,” I explain. “Just not the house.”

“We could find another house near them, right? So that we could see them every day?”

“We would definitely find a place to live near them, and you would probably see them most days.”

“Could we go to all the Bobcats’ home games like we did the Warhawks?”

“Absolutely.”

“Then I want to go!” He finally takes a shot at the ball, but I stop this one with my stick and shoot it back to him.

“You would have to go to a new school and make new friends,” I tell him.

Flashing a confident smile that looks identical to Christian’s, he says, “I like making new friends. It’s not like it’s hard.”

“Okay. Well, we would have to move soon too, before school starts.” He takes another shot that slips by me on the left.

“Yay!”

“Nice one!” I remark in honest admiration. “Do you think you could help me start packing up all your toys and games?”

“And hockey sticks and pads?”

“Of course, those too,” I assure him. “I’m sure they have hockey leagues for your age in North Carolina, too.”

“When do we leave?” he asks.

“Ah, I don’t know yet. As soon as everything is packed up?”

Tossing his stick down, Finley runs to the porch. “Then let’s go, Mommy!”

Laughing, I pick up his stick and carry it with mine to the collection. “First, we’re going to need lots of boxes. I bet we could find some today. I just need to make a few phone calls…”

One to the retirement home and one to Bree first and foremost.

I hate turning down the job offer, but I’m doing what’s best for me now. Me and Finley.

We’re moving to North Carolina.

Oh, the list of things we need to do is going to be so long, starting with finding movers for the furniture, then choosing a school in Greensboro that is still accepting admission, finding a house or an apartment…

But there’s no longer any tightness in my chest. No fear or hesitation at the thought of doing those things. My only concern was how Finley would handle giving up our life here. Since he only seems excited about the change, I’m feeling confident about this decision.

In fact, I’m certain that everything is going to work out just fine for us.

Christian

Tonight is an exhibition game at home, the first of the season. The veterans play against the rookies, including the local minor league team. While it’s mostly for fans, and a way for the coach to fill any last roster spots, it’s also a way to raise money for the local children’s hospital. It feels good to help a worthy cause. The entire team has been buzzing with excitement all week, ready to get back on the ice.

While I love playing in front of the home crowd, I’m missing my two favorite fans. Not seeing them every day after getting back from Georgia has been agonizing. At least I’ll see them in the morning. Since tomorrow is Finley’s first day of school in Bethesda, I’m driving up after the game to be there so I can walk him in with Maya.

Still, I wish they were both here tonight. And that I hadn’t missed school shopping.

“You look like shit,” Preston remarks as he skates up to me when we take the ice for warmups.

“Thanks, asshole.”

Laughing, he says, “I guess that means you haven’t seen their sign yet.”

“What sign?”

Oh god. The last time there was a notable sign in the stadium, it was Elle’s, comparing the size of “my stick” to Preston’s and underperforming. Now what embarrassing shit has she written in glitter?

Preston points a finger over to the seats at the glass where Elle is standing. A giant blue and yellow posterboard sign takes up at least three seats and says, My Dad is our MVP !

Dad.

“Is that…”

“Maya and Finley,” Preston answers. “Who else would it be?” Scowling, he adds, “You better not have any other baby mamas.”

“I don’t, I swear!” I tell him as I skate over to the glass. The sign lowers to the ground, revealing my two favorite people in the world. Both of them are wearing my jersey, making my heart swell. I press my gloved palm to the glass. “You’re here!”

Reading my lips over the crowd noise, Maya replies, “We’re here!”

“Hey, Dad!” Finley says as he jumps up to high five me through the glass. “Did you see our sign?”

“I did! I love it!” I shout loud enough for him and the rest of the arena to hear. To Maya, I say, “I’m so glad you’re here, but doesn’t school start tomorrow morning?”

Maya shakes her head. “Here. Next week.” She points a finger to the ground, meaning…here, in town?

“You’re moving?”

She nods. “The movers brought everything down to a little house in the suburbs we’re renting earlier today,” she says. “Surprise!”

“Holy shit,” I mutter, wondering if I’m misunderstanding or dreaming. When Maya frowns at me with her brows raised in chastisement, I know it’s real. “I meant, holy crap!”

“Riley, we’ve got to get warmed up!” Preston calls out to me.

“Coming!” I shout over my shoulder. Then to my family, I say to them, “I love you both so freaking much. Thank you, baby!”

“We love you too,” Maya calls back. She blows me a kiss, which Finley copies, and I blow them one back.