Page 16 of Playing for Keeps (Seattle Hawks Ice Hockey #4)

“You should go back to bed, Little JJ.”

I nod, swallowing hard, my mouth suddenly feeling as dry as a sandy desert with no moisture in sight. “Are you gonna be okay?” I whisper.

Just like that, the grin returns, like he’s just unwrapped an exciting birthday present. It could win some kind of award because it’s that beautiful and convincing. His eyes even have a little of their sparkle back, just like that. “Of course I’m going to be okay, I always am.”

I smile, but it feels small. I have so much going on in my head from what I heard my parents saying, mixed with Jay’s rendition of what happened.

A few things don’t add up, but I don’t say anything.

Once again, I don’t want to upset him. “I’m glad,” I say, “Goodnight, Jay.” I push off the wall and take a step back down the hall towards my bedroom, not before he pushes off too, but as I turn away from him, I feel his warm hand grab me by the wrist again, halting me in my tracks.

I whirl around, my heart in my throat as he looks down at me.

I feel the heat rise over my body as I look up and meet his gaze, his lips part like he’s going to say something, but after a moment of pause, he doesn’t.

He drops my wrist and makes his way back to the stairs to climb back down to the basement, his glass of water obviously forgotten.

I’m halfway back to my bedroom before I hear him whisper, “Goodnight.”

I’ve read about the Washington Park Arboretum and researched it online, but until I see it in person, I clearly have no idea how magnificent it really is. I can see the outskirts of it now, sitting by the entry in Jay’s car.

Luckily, my get-up is pretty small and I just have one bag of equipment, plus my yoga mat and some blocks.

“You sure you’re not going to get lost in there?” Jay muses as he leaves the engine running by the gates and gazes out of the front windshield.

“I’ll be fine. Beth just texted to say she’s going to have a late lunch with me.”

“So I’m not invited?” he smiles, his eyes diverting back to mine as I unclick my seatbelt and get ready to exit the car.

“Of course you are, do you want to?”

His mouth pulls up in a grin. “I’d love to, but I’ve got training, remember?”

“Ah, that’s right.”

“We’re home this weekend if you want to come to the game. I’m away early next week.”

“That sounds good. I’d love to.”

“So, let me know if you need me to pick you up here later when you’re done, or if you’re going with Beth.”

“Okay, will do.”

“Don’t forget about our dance lesson,” he reminds me with a wink.

“I almost forgot about that.”

He laughs. “I wish I could, I mean, it’s not us getting married or anything. But I know the bridal party all gets up to dance after the bridal waltz, so it would be good to know what we’re doing.”

“And fun, too,” I add. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“I’ll make sure I limber up properly at practice.”

“You do that,” I chuckle, trying to imagine him doing just that. “We don’t want you hurting yourself.”

“Don’t worry, I’m better on my skates. Text me.”

“I will.” I smile as I reach for the door handle. “Thanks, Jay.”

“No problem,” he says. “Any time, I’m here for you. You know that, right?”

I swallow the lump in my throat. He has no idea what’s been going on these past few months, and I feel this overwhelming urge to tell him.

But not now. “Yeah.” I nod. “It’s been really cool hanging out with you this week,” I add.

“Even after we got past that whole awkward thing at that bar on my last visit.”

He laughs now, and it fills the car, reminding me of how things used to be.

I haven’t heard that laugh in a while. “That thing at the bar?” He raises his eyebrows.

“The part where we dirty danced in a sea of people not caring who saw, or when I took you out back and hoisted you up against the wall while I ground into you?”

I swallow, heat rising in my face, my blush now apparent across my cheeks.

He definitely wasn’t bringing that part up when we touched on it at the rink.

Maybe now we’re alone in private he has more to say on the matter.

“Jay!” I let go of the door handle and reach out to shove him in the shoulder as he tries to dodge it.

“Hey, I’m sick of trying to sugar-coat it, Princess. It happened. It shouldn’t have, but it did.”

“You’re not going to tell Tanner, are you?” I gasp. Oh, God. I’d never live that down.

Tanner isn’t a stick in the mud by any stretch, but I think he’d have something to say about me cavorting with his best friend, even if neither of us knew at the time who each other was.

Talk about complicated. And awkward.

“Of course, I’m not going to tell Tanner. It was an accident, and like you said, a mistake.”

A mistake? Shit. I did say that.

He’s probably right, but why does that feel a little like a stab to the heart? Especially when I was the one to say it first.

“Was it that horrible?” I don’t mean it to sound like I’m put out, but it seems to hit harder than it’s meant to.

His head turns quicker than I can blink, and familiar fingers land on my wrist. Much like that time in the hallway when he knew I’d been eavesdropping and heard more than I should have, but I kept it at bay for the sake of his feelings.

“That’s not what I meant. It wasn’t horrible, Jade, nothing like that. I just feel bad I acted that way with you, that’s all I meant.”

“Acted what way? Your usual way?”

His eyes look up for a moment, like he’s contemplating his answer. His head is shaking before he even speaks. “That’s not my usual way, well, not with you it isn’t.”

I reach down to the floor for my over-sized purse by way of distraction. “I’ll pretend to believe you, even if we were victims of circumstance.” I figure I need to lighten the air a little. I don’t know why I keep going on about that night. It happened like he said, I need to get over it.

He laughs now, heartily, and I can’t help the smile that permeates my face. Jay has always had the ability to make the most intense situations feel light as air with a simple laugh or a smile.

Now is no different. He’s gotten even better at it over the years, perfected it down to a fine art. “You say some funny things sometimes, Little JJ .”

“Glad I can amuse you. Now, I’d better get out of here or I’ll never get anything done.”

“Good luck with the filming. Text me later,” he says again.

“Will do.”