Page 8

CHAPTER 8

NATE

We’ve been back at Kingston University for a month. And since then, River and I have fucked Samantha in almost every way possible.

Doggy style.

Anal.

Double penetration.

Cowgirl.

Reverse cowgirl.

No missionary, though. Too fucking boring and just not my thing. I could keep going, but you get the point. The only thing left is double vaginal penetration. She’s still considering it, which gives me hope. It also means this one is a keeper.

I lean against the headboard beside River, knees bent into my chest, and type a message to our girl.

Nate

My dick misses your pussy.

Samantha

She misses him, too. But I have to work tonight.

Nate

Lame. Are you coming over on Friday?

Samantha

In my birthday suit :)

Nate

Good girl. Send me a pic of your pussy.

Nate

And your tits. I miss those, too.

Samantha

Bad boy

Nate

You have no idea.

Samantha

I kinda do.

After that, she sends me a full nude so I can see everything. She even zoomed in on her pussy, which looks wet. Now, my cock is rock hard and tenting my sweats.

Nate

Fuck me.

Samantha

You can do that all weekend if you want. I don’t have to work.

Nate

Yes, I want. Your pussy is mine.

Samantha

No River this weekend?

Nate

Yeah, my bad. Riv will be here, too. We want to try DVP. Are you still down?

Samantha

Sure. I’m game.

Nate

That’s my girl.

Samantha

I have to go. So, I’ll leave you with this…

She sends me a close-up of her fingers stuffed into her tight, wet pussy, cum sticking to her skin.

“Jesus, fuck,” I mutter. “This girl is killing me.”

River sits on the bed beside me, leaning over my shoulder. “I don’t see the point in sexting.”

He doesn’t see the point in talking to the girls either. This is my job. River won’t give them his phone number, which is understandable. He also makes me deal with the NDAs and all the legal shit. It’s a small price to pay.

“What?” I laugh. “You don’t like sexting? How old are you, ninety?”

He blushes. “Shut up.”

“I bet you’d sext with me.”

His cheeks get even redder. “Nate, stop.”

I type a text to River to see how he’ll respond.

Nate

What are you wearing?

River slips his hand into his pocket and sighs when he sees the message. “Really, dude?”

“Come on,” I say to goad him. “Play along.”

He tilts his head to the side, a strand of hair falling onto his forehead. I get the urge to push it away but stop myself. Because that’s just fucking weird.

“Are you scared, Riv?” I get in his face and smirk. “Hmm? Are you afraid of the big, bad wolf?”

“God, you’re annoying,” River mutters, fingers flying across the keypad of his cell phone. “Remind me why we’re friends.”

River

Nothing. I hate clothes.

I laugh. “If a girl texted me this, I’d be on my way to her place.”

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “Doubt that. You’re too fucking lazy.”

“Meh. Not lazy. I just prefer the pussy delivery service.”

River shakes his head. “Fucking idiot. I’m done playing this game.”

“Wanna see some of the pics Samantha sent me?”

He stuffs the phone into his pocket. “Nah, I’m good.”

“You don’t like her?”

He stares down at my navy blue sheets and shrugs. “She’s fine.”

I lock my phone and toss it on the mattress. “That sounded real convincing.”

River snaps his head to me, hugging his knees to his chest. “You miss her, don’t you? Are you going to ask her to be your girlfriend?”

“Fuck, no,” I fire back at him. “I don’t miss her . I miss fucking her. Big difference. I’m bound to our stupid one-woman rule. God, I’m so horny. I’d hump your leg to get off if you would let me.”

River laughs, and his shoulder bumps mine. The simple human contact sends a shiver down my arms and legs, straight to my aching cock. I really would hump his leg right now like a dog in heat. Hell, I might even fuck him with enough drugs in my system.

River’s expression turns grim, and then he says, “I can’t live not knowing when the next sex tape is going to pop up and ruin our lives.”

I nod. “Yeah, yeah. I know. I’m behaving myself for you.”

“I don’t care for her. There’s just something about Samantha that… I don’t know… I can’t place it. But something is off with her.”

“She signed an NDA, and we film everything,” I remind him. “If she ever tries to use it against us, she’ll look way worse than us.” I show him my phone. “Look at what she sent me in the past five minutes.”

River doesn’t even glance at her, which is crazy because she’s hot. “I don’t think we should trust her.”

“Why?”

He rolls his broad shoulders. “I wish I could tell you. It’s just a feeling.”

River can’t answer me because there’s nothing wrong with Samantha. She’s perfect for us. He knows this but won’t allow himself to get too involved.

“I need sex.” I hold out my hand so he can see how much I’m shaking. “It’s bad, Riv. Wanna jerk off with me?”

“No.”

Sighing, I lean against the wall and look at the ceiling. “Why am I like this?”

“You know why. I think it’s time for you to consider going to therapy again.”

When left to my own devices, I act out. My skin is ready to peel off my bones. The craving is back and rearing its ugly head. Sex is an obsession for me. I think about it constantly. All day on repeat, dirty thoughts race through my head.

I would find another girl to satisfy my needs, but River has a hard rule. One girl at a time. Without Samantha here, I have no choice but to seek other forms of relief.

“You can jerk off without me,” River suggests.

I shake my head.

Here’s the thing. Sex has nothing to do with River, yet it has everything to do with him. I can’t explain it. He healed me from the worst trauma of my life. River was there for me when I thought I would never recover.

My sex addiction and River go hand-in-hand. I fear what will happen when he’s not around, traveling the country with an NHL team… and I’m stuck here.

I give him my best sad face, batting my long lashes. “Will you do it for me?”

River’s hand feels incredible on my dick. He knows how much pressure to apply and does this twisty thing with his wrist. Unlike with women, I don’t have to give him instructions. My best friend knows my body as well as his own.

“Nate, stop it.” His eyebrows knit together. “You’re out of fucking control.”

“Fine. I’ll deal with this on my own.”

Done with this conversation, I slide off the bed and race downstairs. In the living room, I find a handful of my teammates who live in the house with River and me. They will follow me down the rabbit hole if I lead the way.

“Who wants to go to Lucky’s?” I stand at the center of the living room and face my roommates sitting on the sectional couch. “My treat.”

Parker Hale peels his eyes from the book on his lap. “It’s Tuesday night, Brooks.”

“So,” I snap. “Does your dick not work on Tuesday?”

He rolls his blue eyes. “Asshole.”

I sit on the cushion beside him, grab the book from his lap, and toss it onto the floor. “You love strippers. How much did you drop on that chick with those huge fake tits last week?”

He slides a hand through his short, black curls, and his T-shirt rides up his toned stomach. For a dude, he’s good-looking and fit. He’s muscular but not bulky, yet nowhere as ripped as me.

“You’re paying?”

I flash a victorious smirk. “Hell, yeah. Grab your coat.”

“I’m down.” Carter Hayes rises from the couch and stretches his arms above his head. “Never turn down free pussy. That’s my fucking motto.”

“That’s the spirit,” I tell him.

Carter is tall and blond, his hair cropped on the sides and longer on the top. Still wet from the shower, it flops onto his forehead and hangs over his right eye.

“Pick me, pick me,” Kevin Monroe says, laughing, the defenseman’s hand raised like he’s volunteering for The Hunger Games .

Two of my teammates emerge from the kitchen, giving me a nod of thanks, and head toward the door with the other players.

The thing about addicts? They like it when other people do bad shit with them. Then, it doesn’t feel so wrong and dirty.

I glance at River, arms crossed over his thick chest and shaking his head.

He can disapprove all he wants.

Fuck, I only asked for a handjob, not anal sex. You’d think after all the times he’s touched my dick during sex, he wouldn’t care. But he’s acting all weirded out.

River steps in front of me. “Nate, don’t do this.”

“Have you reconsidered?”

His gaze sweeps around the room at our teammates. All five hockey players are now putting on their shoes by the door.

“Is my hand really what you want?” River whispers.

I press my lips to his ear so only he can hear me, and he shivers as my breath heats his skin. “Someone’s touching my dick tonight. I don’t care who.”

At that, he scowls. “Fuck you, Nate.”

“If you want it to mean something, it can.”

What am I saying?

I’m losing my damn mind over my best friend. And I don’t understand why. Lately, he has become my new fascination—a twisted obsession.

River shakes his head and steps back. “No, just fucking go. Don’t come crawling into my bed when you can’t sleep tonight.”

I narrow my eyes at him. “Really? What’s your problem?”

“You will do anything to get what you want.” He tugs at the ends of his dark brown hair and sighs. “I can’t do this with you anymore.”

My heart races a mile a minute, ready to make a prison break from my chest. Fucking traitorous organ. It always works harder when River is around. Somehow, my heart knows what I want before I do.

Do I want River?

Anymore, I don’t know. I can’t make sense of my feelings. My trauma bonds us, transforming our friendship into something… different. My life only makes sense with River. If he were to leave me…

Parker cracks open the front door, breaking our staring contest. “Yo, Brooks!” Are we going or what?”

I toss my car keys at him. “Start the engine. I’ll meet you at my car.”

He catches the keys and closes the door.

Once we’re alone, I grab River’s shirt and pull him to me. “You can stop me, Riv.”

It’s the truth.

I might take and take to feed my addiction. But I would give him anything. He’s my best friend, the only person who understands me.

He licks his lips. “What is this, Nate?”

“I don’t get the question.”

“You and me.” He sighs. “I’m so fucking confused anymore.”

Pressing our chests together, I drink in his scent and memorize the feel of his muscles. “Do you hate touching me?”

He shakes his head.

“When I ask you to jerk me off, do you say yes because it turns you on… or because you’re my friend and want to help me?”

River sighs. “This started as a way to help you heal. But the lines are getting blurred.”

“Do you think your dad was right about us?”

This question has been running through my mind since Ryan accused us of being gay. If I were going to be gay for anyone, it would be River. I mean, look at him. Perfect in every way. Sweet yet rough. A body that deserves to be praised.

He’s also selfless and puts me first, even to his detriment. I know that makes me a selfish bastard, but I can’t get enough of him.

“You’re my best friend,” he says after an awkward pause. “I would do anything for you.”

“Anything?”

He nods, this time gazing into my eyes. “Anything.”

“And if I stay home?”

Before he can answer, Parker opens the door, his cheeks flushed and huffing. “What the fuck, Brooks! We’re not sitting out here all night for your enjoyment. Let’s go.” Then he looks at River. “Hey, Rousseau. You coming?”

“Nah,” River says and starts walking toward the staircase. “You guys go without me. I have schoolwork to do.”

Just like that, the conversation we have been dodging all summer ends, causing even more separation between us and unanswered questions.