Page 20

CHAPTER 20

RIVER

When I was twelve, Nate showed me how to jerk off. I mean, it’s not like I didn’t understand the concept. My dick was like a toy I couldn’t stop playing with… but Nate made it fun.

The first time I touched my dick to completion, Nate was watching porn on the bed across from mine. I heard a woman moaning and a man grunting. He called her a good girl, and I lifted my head from the pillow to see Nate on his bed.

Shirtless, Nate touched himself through the slit in his boxers. “Mmm,” he muttered, eyes on his cell phone, the screen light casting a glow on his face.

Like the rest of Nate, his dick was big, but everything about Nate was massive. He never looked like a boy.

His dick was beautiful.

Perfect and smooth.

The head peeked out of his boxers, and he grunted as he stroked his shaft, rubbing his thumb over the tip. He looked so relaxed and focused.

I rolled onto my side. “What are you doing?”

“Looking at porn and fucking my hand.”

“Dude, we have practice in the morning.”

“So.” Nate continued jerking his shaft, staring at the screen. “You should try it. Feels good.”

I sat up, curious. “Let me see.”

“Get over here.”

I slid out of the warmth of my heavy blankets and climbed onto his bed. Following his lead, I leaned my back against the wall, legs stretched across the mattress, feet dangling off the side beside his.

“Isn’t she hot?” Nate licked his lips, then glanced at me, eyes wide. “We need a girlfriend like her.”

Not girlfriends plural. I should have known back then that I would never escape Nate. Every sexual encounter from that day forward involved him. If only I had known what I was getting myself into when I hopped onto his bed.

“Yeah,” I muttered. “I guess.”

“You guess?” Nate snapped his head at me. “We’re gonna get the hottest girls. Like this one. Just wait and see.”

I wasn’t sure how I felt about girls at that point. All I knew was that I liked the sight of Nate’s dick. A whole fucking lot. And I wasn’t sure what that meant.

“Touch yourself,” Nate said, which was kind of weird. “It’s just me, Riv. I won’t bite. You never have to be afraid of anything around me.”

“I’m not scared.”

I pulled out my dick just to prove a point. He eyed me up for a second, then his focus returned to the woman on his screen.

He rolled his tongue over his lips. “Look at her pussy. She’s so wet.” Nate shoved the phone in my face. “She’s leaking his cum.”

I was surprised Nate knew so much about sex. It wasn’t until a year later that I found out where his experience came from—and it gutted me.

“Nate,” I whispered, eyes meeting his in the dimly lit room. “Should we be doing this?”

Nate didn’t see the issue and said, “Why not?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. Is this something friends do together?”

“Who cares? It’s what we do together.” He showed me the girl, her boobs so big they took up half the frame. “She has nice tits. Do you like them?”

“Yeah,” I said to make him happy.

“Does she excite you?”

I glanced at his dick and nodded.

“Then do something about it.”

Moments like that one have me questioning everything I ever thought about Nate and his sexuality. Is he secretly bisexual and afraid to tell me?

After a long day and a belly full of food, I follow Nate to his bedroom. He’s all smiles as we cross the threshold.

“I want to show you something.” He grins. “You’re gonna love it.”

I step into the room. “Okay, what? You’re giving me creepy vibes.”

He reaches over me and locks the door, his arm brushing mine. With him this close, I drink in the scent of his cologne and let the delicious smell burrow into my nostrils. I want to pull his face to mine and kiss his lips. Throw him against the wall and make him scream my name.

But I won’t.

I’m a chicken shit.

Nate turns on the flat-screen TV. Of course, there’s a porno paused with two asses in my face.

Does he watch anything else?

As I move closer, I realize it’s Nate and Samantha.

“We didn’t want you to miss out.” Nate gives me a playful look and shrugs. “It was weird without you last night.”

What does that mean?

Don’t read into it.

Last night, Nate chased me downstairs naked. He even sent me a clip of him fucking Samantha’s ass to entice me to come home. It didn’t work, though.

“You sent me this,” I say, turning toward the door, annoyed.

He promised to quell his urges for me. It’s supposed to be our night. The one day I get Nate all to myself.

Nate grips my shoulder and spins me around, a wicked smile on his face. “You didn’t see this one.”

“You’re doing that creepy thing again.”

He laughs and plops down on the bed, patting the space beside him. “I made this just for you. Don’t be a dick. Come and watch with me.” He winks. “And please do cum .”

I sit on the mattress beside him, our backs to the wall like old times. The familiarity excites me. It reminds me of before my true obsession with Nate started.

“I couldn’t get hard after you left,” he tells me, zero emotion in his tone. “Samantha was getting pissed. So, I started looking through some of our old videos for inspiration.”

With my eyes on Nate, I study his face. The strength of his jaw, the perfect curve of his nose. His sun-kissed skin. Those pouty full lips I want wrapped around my cock.

I wet my lips. “Why couldn’t you get hard?”

“Because you weren’t here.” His hand drops to the bed, his fingers inches from mine. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“It’s part of your addiction.”

He shoves a hand through his blond hair to brush it off his forehead. “Yeah, ya think?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. How many times did you come yesterday?”

Nate leans his head on the wall and looks up at the ceiling. “Umm, like… Fuck, I don’t know.”

“A lot,” I answer for him. “You started jerking off the minute you woke up. Then, in the shower. The whole fucking house heard you.”

Nate laughs. “They only wish they had my stamina.”

“You invited Samantha over after dinner. So, that was, what, around seven o’clock? And you went all night with her and then again this morning. I’m surprised your dick hasn’t fallen off yet.”

He snickers. “I like sex. What can I say?”

“Maybe a little too much.”

He clicks a button on the remote. From this angle, I see Nate’s bubble butt that makes me want to take a bite. Samantha is in front of him, her wrists tied to the metal bedpost.

“I thought you would like this,” Nate says as if it’s his life’s work, and he is proud of it. “I know how much you love anal.”

Yeah, I fucking do .

Giving. Receiving.

I want it all.

“I had to chop it up to get all the angles just right for you,” he says as the frame switches to where his dick slides in and out of her wet hole. “The first part I filmed with the camera. This clip is with my cell phone.” He looks at me. “You like it?”

“Yeah,” I say, semihard just seeing his hot body on the screen and that big dick I love so much.

“I’m so fucking hard right now.” He hits the Stop button. “You’re not still mad about what happened at the theater, right?”

I shake my head. “But tomorrow, you’re calling the doctor.”

“Promise.”

Nate shoves down his pants and kicks them onto the floor with his boxers. Then, he peels off his Kingston University T-shirt. He has this thing about total nudity when he jerks off. Not like I mind at all. The view from my side of the bed is amazing.

His abs flex as he leans forward to strip off his socks. I stare, mouth open, my dick straining against my pants. Long and hard, his cock pokes his stomach.

Fuck me .

I think about leaning over and putting him in my mouth. There were a few times I thought he would let me. Nate was all strung out like a junkie needing a fix, begging me to touch him. But to my disappointment, he only wanted my hand.

“What are you waiting for?” Nate asks, remote in his hand. “I’m fucking dying over here, Riv.”

Of course, he is.

Nate never goes a day without some form of sex. If he’s not jerking off, he’s getting head from puck bunnies or handjobs under the table during class. That’s why I talked him into the deal with Samantha. Otherwise, his urges would control him. And since this is my doing, it’s my responsibility to help him.

I yank off my shirt, then toss my pants and boxer briefs onto the floor. Since we were teenagers, we have always done it this way. Our backs to the wall, our legs hanging off the bed, fully naked.

I know why I prefer it this way… but why does Nate? He’s not into men.

Focused on me, Nate licks his lips. “Ready?”

I nod and fist my shaft.

As the video plays on the TV, we sit back and enjoy the show. On all fours, Samantha grips the headboard and moans. Nate’s taking her ass hard, slamming in and out of her with force.

“What do you think? You like this one?”

“Yes,” I mutter, matching his strokes. “You did good.”

A smile graces his lips.

My eyes flick between the screen and Nate’s dick, which is even bigger up close. Pre-cum drips from his hand and down his long length. Legs spread wide, he is so bared to me that he might as well bend over and let me take him from behind.

Fuck, I want that .

I put my right hand on the bed beside his left one. His fingers are right there. So, I inch toward him, needing to feel his heat. My pinky finger brushes his.

He curls his pinky finger around mine. I hold my breath, too fucking stunned to process the simple gesture. It’s stupid to overthink anything with Nate. His addiction always wins, consuming him like a virus.

Nate weaves his fingers between mine as tremors shake through him. We’re both on the edge, about to fall off the fucking cliff.

I hold his hand like we’re boyfriends and continue fisting my dick, matching his grunts. But I don’t take my eyes off him. Every sound, every stroke. I pretend all of it is for me and not Samantha.

Nate catches me watching him. He pauses for a second like he’s trying to decide what to do.

I hold his gaze.

Will he kiss me if I close the distance?

I can’t tell with Nate. Sometimes, he acts so comfortable in his skin, only caring about chasing his next orgasm that I think he would let me. Other times, he plays it off as if this is normal. If our roommates were to walk in here right now, they would be horrified.

“Riv,” he says, his focus still on me. “You’re not watching the movie.”

“Neither are you.”

Using his pre-cum, Nate glides his thumb over the tip, then up and down his shaft. “You like watching me, don’t you?”

Drunk on pleasure, I mutter, “Yes.”

“You gonna come for me, Riv?”

Oh god.

Why does he do this to me?

“Yes,” I moan.

“Do you want me to come for you?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Do you think you deserve my orgasm?”

What?

“You need to earn it,” he says, confident and cocky, with a smirk tipping up the right corner of his perfect mouth.

“How?”

“Like this.” Nate wraps my hand around his shaft. “Make me come.”

I can’t stand it anymore.

The pressure in my balls builds to a painful crescendo. I jerk our dicks, moaning as my cum spills into my hand.

“Good boy,” Nate whispers, head tipped back, licking his lips. “You always come for me, don’t you, Riv?”

I love it when he praises me.

Nate lasts a minute longer than me, making the hottest sounds when he comes. It takes every ounce of my energy not to climb on top of him and ride his cock.

“Fuck,” he mumbles, completely spent. “That was… Wow! Thanks for that.”

I don’t know what comes over me, but I suck his cum from my finger.

“What are you doing?”

I want to die.

My brain is all fucked up.

I need to leave ASAP.

Nate is waiting for a response, so I say, “I wanted to see?—”

“How I taste?”

I bob my head, cheeks flushed, unable to look at him.

“What’s the verdict?”

“Salty,” I whisper, feeling like an idiot for losing myself in the heat of the moment.

“Does my cum taste good?”

“Mmhmm.”

His eyes light up, and he swipes a finger over the head of my leaking cock and puts it into his mouth. “Tastes better than I thought it would.”

I laugh. “You think about tasting my cum often?”

“Nah. You know what I mean. Girls always say it’s salty, but not you. I get a hint of something sweet.”

I stare at him in awe, afraid to speak and break the spell he has me under.

“I’m so horny,” he says after sucking his finger clean. “Why is this turning me on so much?”

The logical answer is that Nate could be bisexual. But this is Nate we’re talking about. He craves sex like a junkie needs a fix. Eating my cum was nothing more than curiosity for him. It didn’t even register in his brain.

“Because you’re an addict.”

“I hate when you say that,” he tosses back at me. “It’s normal for guys our age to like sex.”

“You more than like sex, Nate.”

Ignoring my comment, Nate slides off the bed and grabs a bath towel from the back of the door. He wipes the cum from his dick and throws a towel at me.

“Clean up and leave. I want to get some sleep.”

The sting of his rejection hits me deep in my marrow. It’s not even late. Nate still has at least four more hours of porn-watching before he goes to bed.

What was I thinking?

I made things weird.

I shouldn’t have touched him.

If only I could take it back.

Fuck .