Page 87 of Only With Me

He chuckles softly, moving slightly so I can see the shadows over his face. “How do you feel now that you have?”

“Boneless and euphoric. Like I could sleep for ten hours straight.”

He scratches his cheek. “Sounds about right.”

“But I’m afraid it’s gonna hurt the first time I have sex,” I admit.

“It might, a little. But if your partner knows what they’re doing, you should only feel some tightness and discomfort in the beginning. If you’re wet and relaxed, it’ll reduce the pain.”

“So lots of foreplay?”

“Yes, lots.”

“Does that include for him, too?”

He lifts a shoulder. “It can, yes. But it’s most important for you, especially when it’s your first or even second time.”

I sigh, holding up my head with my palm. “I wanna do it again.”

He bellows out a laugh. “Well, you can do it as much as you want now that you know what to do.”

“I dunno if I’ll be able to do it on my own, but I’ll haveta try later.”

“You’ll get better at it…the more you do it.”

“And I’m willing to bet the same goes for sex, right? I’m probably gonna be bad and awkward my first time.”

“I doubt it. Just tell your partner what you need and don’t be afraid to tell him to slow down or give you more time. Communication is key.”

“Have you ever taken someone’s virginity?”

It’s hard to be sure in this light, but I swear his cheeks turn red.

“Uh, yeah. After I lost mine, I dated around and took a few others.”

“A few?” I shriek. “No wonder you’re good at this.”

“At what?”

“Knowin’ what a woman’s needs are and being able to talk me through it. I assume most guys couldn’t or wouldn’t be able to successfully.”

“Most are too lazy,” he retorts. “Or they don’t care.”

“So now I just need to figure out which guys are worthy of my V-card.” I snort because that’s going to be easier said than done. “Sounds truly awful now that I’m thinkin’ about it.”

“Welcome to the dating world.” His jaw clenches and I wonder if he’s over talking about this.

“Is that why you’re still single after all these years? You didn’t wanna put in the effort anymore?”

“I didn’t wanna get my heart broken again,” he clarifies, sadness coating his voice. “Not only that, but my mental health wasn’t great after Wilder’s hospitalization. It’s a miracle Delilah put up with me for those two years because I was always worryin’ and would drag her out with me so I could keep an eye on him. It doesn’t seem fair to put someone else through that, especially since I knew she had you and your dad to think about, too.”

“I understand being a package deal. Whoever I end up dating or having a serious relationship with has to be okay with me being accessible to my dad and regularly checkin’ in on him. I can’t imagine every guy would be supportive of that.”

“Sadly, you’re right. People can be selfish and manipulative. They don’t always show their true colors right away either. They’ll do whatever it takes to get you, but they’ll slowly reveal who they are by gaslightin’ you or makin’ you pick between them and your family.”

“Wow, you’re givin’ me so much hope right now,” I deadpan.

He lifts a shoulder, a sincere grin on his face. “Now you understand why datin’ is hard. It ain’t all flowers and candlelight dinners.”