Page 49 of Only With Me

It’s been her this whole fucking time, and I had no idea.

Probably didn’t help that I didn’t know many specific details about her in the first place. If we had exchanged names, there’s no way we wouldn’t have realized, and then it would’ve stopped before it ever started.

And clearly, she has no idea either by her reaction to seeing me and assuming I was there on a quick coffee run.

The only reason I asked if she was sitting alone was to confirm—rather,triple-check—that she was, in fact, waiting for someone.Me.

I need to text her and put her out of her misery. Though I hate lying, especially to someone who doesn’t deserve it, the truth would hurt her more.

I can’t befriendswith my ex-girlfriend’s little sister.

And if that turned into more? There’s no way Delilah would be cool with that.

Harlow’s too young, too sweet, too forbidden.

Though I’m surprised we had some things in common, we’re at two different paths in our lives, and there’s no point in leading her on to think we could ever be something more.

Fuck. Now I have to pretend to be this other person from the group chat and act like I still have no idea who she is while knowing who she is in real life.

Waylon: Hey, I’m so sorry I didn’t text sooner. A work thing happened, and I wasn’t able to get away.

I can’t suggest we reschedule because I have no intentions on revealing myself after some of the personal things I’ve told her. Not that I don’t trust her, but I wouldn’t have said them if I knew it was her.

Like a creep, I crouch in my seat and wait for her to check her phone.

She gets in her seat, buckles, and then I see her hold it up. It hides more of her face from this angle but enough is shown to see she’s not happy with me. Instead of responding, she sets her phone down and starts the car.

I deserve that.

At this point, I’d be surprised if she responds.

By the time I get home, I feel like utter shit. The guilt is eating at me, and no matter what I do or say, it won’t fix what’s already happened.

I was so wrong about her age and never once considered I knew her in real life or that we’d be connected somehow because nothing seemed familiar.

But still, I can’t be too disappointed it ended up being her because Harlow’s gorgeous, sweet, and honest. I know she’d never tell anyone what was said in our conversations.

I think back to some of them and can now piece together what she told me and what I already know about her.

She admitted there was a time she struggled with her mental health and turned to equine therapy. But now that I’m aware it’s her, I know where those struggles stemmed from.

Her dad’s work accident when she was twelve.

The incident when she was thirteen.

Spending years in and out of the hospital until she was sixteen.

Delilah was a wreck during that time frame and as much as I tried to support her, I was young and selfish in wanting her to spend more time with me. I was also still reeling fromwhat happened with Wilder two years prior. It became obvious neither of us was in a position to be in a relationship.

I hardly saw Harlow while she was recovering, and even after, she only came to the ranch to train and we rarely spoke.

It seemed like I shouldn’t, considering her sister’s and my history, and only God knew what Delilah had told her about me.

Now I wish I could take it all back and not get involved with the group chat because she’s going to feel rejected by me standing her up when there’s nothing wrong with her.

If the situation was different, I would’ve happily introduced myself and had coffee with her.

But there’s no circumstance where it’ll be okay for us to continue texting.