Page 158 of Only With Me

He lifts his shoulders again, avoiding eye contact with me. He’s embarrassed, and I get it, but he has no reason to be.

“Because I knew you’d be all…Wilder, I’m so proud of you.You’re doing the right thing. Good job workin’ through your issues…” His mocking tone has me snorting.

“Oh God, how dare I care about my own twin brother? What an asshole, am I?”

“Yeah, you are. Glad you finally admitted it.”

I roll my eyes. “Well, Iamproud of you. What made you finally decide to go?”

I’ve only been begging him for fifteen years.

He leans against the truck, folding his arms, and staring at the dirt. “It was after Mr. Fanning died and I realized how many people were impacted from his death. Worst of all, I saw how much pain his family was in, even you. He lived with chronic pain for years before he decided he couldn’t live with it anymore. I guess it made me realize that could be me someday if I continued ignorin’ my mental health. Granted it’s not physical pain, but there’s some shit I need to work through so I don’t get to the point where I can’t do it anymore. Seein’ how sad and upset y’all were got to me. I’d never wanna be the reason y’allfeel that way, and if I can do somethin’ about it now before I lose the ability to reason with myself than I owe it to my family to try. Just because I’m not there now doesn’t mean someday I couldn’t be and that thought scared the shit outta me.”

“Wow…I’m so impressed. And damn proud you came to that realization.” I pull him into a hug even though he resists at first.

“I hate that it took something like this to happen.”

“Either way, this is a huge step. You deserve to be happy, too. Workin’ through your issues in a healthy way will help you see there’s so much more to life than drinkin’ and random hookups.”

“Yeah, being sober and abstinent is fuckin’ hard,” he grumbles, and I crack up, but I’m glad he’s trying. “And I was so close to makin’ it eight seconds on the mechanical bull.”

I snort.Sure he was.

“If you ever want me to join you for a session, just lemme know.”

“Yeah, my therapist and I have talked about it, but I’d like to spend a bit more time with him on my own first. He’s gonna refer me to a psychiatrist so we can discuss medication options, too.”

I nod, patting his back although he looks less than thrilled about it, I’m glad he’s doing it. “Take all the time you need. I’ll be here.”

“Thanks. Appreciate it.”

“Well, are you ready to help me now with Harlow’s birthday surprise?”

“You mean, so you can reap the rewards and get laid?”

I smirk, shrugging unapologetically.

We’ve messed around some once she started feeling better, and I even surprised her with a toy so she could start getting used to the size and feeling of having it inside her. But we’ve been waiting for her ribs and body to heal post-surgery. She justgot the okay from her doctor to ride Piper again, so now she can start getting back into her practice routine.

“Alright, whaddya need me to do?” he asks, and then I give him a list of instructions.

One of the items on Harlow's romance wishlist is something I've been waiting to do until the weather warms up, but with it being her birthday, I wanted to do it tonight.

I also want to do something extra to cheer her up. As much as she’s been acting fine about what happened to her and Mr. Fanning passing, I can tell she’s struggling. Fortunately, she started therapy last week and is still going to grief counseling with her family.

But the other one I’ve planned includes my family.

Even though it’s not a Sunday, I have Wilder helping me get things ready for a special occasion at our parent’s house that Harlow’s been begging to be included in.

Once I’m ready, I text her that I’m on my way.

When I was in town earlier, I bought two rose arrangements so I could give one to Mrs. Fanning. I’ve been trying to make sure Harlow and I spend equal time between our places so her mom isn’t left alone too often. Delilah goes over on the nights she doesn’t work and we’ve even had a game night in Mr. Fanning’s honor.

The three of them started going to a grief support group, and I think it’s been helpful being around others going through the same thing.

I know nothing will take away their pain completely but it’s still good to see Mrs. Fanning smile from time to time.

When I knock, she answers the door. “Waylon, sweetheart. C’mon in. She’s almost ready.”