Page 35 of Make Me Trust Again (Bluebonnet Creek #3)
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
ROSE
“Are they here yet?” Kyle asks, bouncing on the balls of his feet with excitement. I’ve lost track of how many times he’s asked this same question since he woke up today.
I wipe my hands on a towel, trying to fight my smile. “Patience. They’ll be here ? —”
The doorbell rings, making me pause. “—now.”
Kyle’s whole face lights up and, before I can blink, he dashes for the door.
Letting go of the towel, I shake my head and follow after him. The door is wide open, and the two boys are talking animatedly.
Savannah looks up when she hears me approaching. “This is another level of excitement.”
“Tell me about it. Kyle couldn’t sit still for more than five seconds, and he’s been asking the whole morning when you’d come.” I tilt my head to the side. “You wanna come in for a drink?”
She shakes her head. “No, it’s fine. I have to get back home.
Blake’s with Poppy, but he has to leave shortly since he promised Miguel they’ll work out together.
With the training camp just around the corner, they’ve been at it for the last week.
” She glances at the two boys who’ve disappeared down the hallway. “Are you going to be okay with them?”
“Yeah. Hopefully three boys can’t get into too much trouble.”
Sav chuckles softly. “You’d be surprised. I swear, some days when I was working in school, I wouldn’t even fully turn around, and one of the kids would get into trouble.”
I give her a pointed look. “You’re not really selling this to me, Sav.”
“You’ll do good. I’m not worried about you.” Savannah shakes her head, her gaze going over my shoulders, her face turning serious as she faces me again. “No John?”
Any amusement I’ve been feeling dies, my shoulders turning tense at the mention of my ex. “Nope. I tried calling and even texted him to see if he wanted to come, but I didn’t hear back.”
I can’t even pretend I’m surprised, because the truth is, this isn’t the first time, and it won’t be the last. John barely even acknowledged Kyle’s or my birthday, for that matter.
It was usually Kyle and me for his birthday, since we didn’t have much family around, and it wasn’t easy making friends when you had a little baby who spent countless hours at the doctor’s office and speech therapy, so I’d make him cupcakes and a little party for the two of us.
Last year, we celebrated with my parents, but John came up with some kind of excuse to get out of it.
But this year, Kyle wanted to invite his friends.
He was so excited about the idea that there was no way I could tell him no.
Savannah places her hand on my arm, giving it a squeeze. “I’m so sorry, Rose.”
“It’s fine.” I shake my head. “You know what’s the saddest thing? Kyle didn’t even ask if his dad was coming or waited for him to call. And I can’t even be mad at that. I want my boy to be happy and have an amazing time.”
The guilt and shame that usually comes when talking about John, and the way he treats us, are nowhere in sight, and I’m glad for it.
I’m so done with trying to defend him—to myself and to others—because the truth is, if he wanted to be here, he would.
This is his choice, and I’m done making excuses for him. God knows it didn’t do me any good.
“He will, I’m sure of it. And John…” Sadness crosses her face, her gaze growing distant. “Some people are just not meant to be parents.”
The rumors from last winter cross my mind. People have said they’ve seen Savannah’s mom in Bluebonnet after she’d disappeared years ago, leaving Savannah with her grandmother. They were short-lived, but now I wonder if there had been some truth in them.
“No, they aren’t.”
Savannah leaves soon after, and some fifteen minutes later, Mrs. Fernandez drops Gage off as well. The boys had a great time at the Fourth of July party last week, and Kyle invited him to join us as well.
They are playing in the living room, while I go to my room to change before we need to leave. I’m just finishing putting on my lip gloss when I hear the doorbell ring again.
I pause, thinking I might have imagined it, when I hear one of the boys comment on it.
With one last look at my reflection to make sure everything is in place, I exit my room, all the boys turning their attention on me.
“Grab your things and go to the bathroom if you have to. We’ll be leaving in a few. ”
The boys cheer excitedly, and a smile tugs at the corner of my mouth as I make my way to the door, pulling it open, only to come to a stop.
“Chase?” My heart does a little flip inside my chest as I stare at the man opposite to me, my fingers curling around the door as we just stare at one another.
I haven’t seen him since the party the other day, when he left so suddenly.
I can still clearly see his ashen face and the look of horror in his eyes as his body locked up.
It surprised me at that moment. Chase always seemed so big, so unbreakable, but the moment the fireworks started, it was like a completely different man was in front of me, one entirely lost to this world, lost to me. I didn’t think, I just reacted.
It wasn’t until later that everything clicked for me.
The fireworks, his injuries, and the fact that he was ex-military.
He was having a panic attack because the fireworks probably sounded way too similar to gunshots, and my heart ached for him and everything he went through, everything he was still going through.
“What are you doing here?”
Something bangs inside, and Chase’s gaze immediately darts over my shoulder.
Shit.
Children’s laughter follows, and I can see him relax slightly before his gaze shifts to me. “You have company?”
“Yes, sorry, I wanted to check with you the other day but…” He presses his lips into a tight line, so I bite the inside of my cheek, letting the words trail off. “Are we being too loud? I swear, we’ll be out?—”
“Mom, we’re read— Chase!”
A beaming smile appears on my son’s face when he spots Chase. “Are you here for my party?”
Chase’s brows pull together in confusion as he glances from Kyle to me. “Party?”
“It’s his birthday,” I explain, and quickly add, “but I’m taking them out, so we won’t be too loud.”
Kyle puffs out his chest proudly, and I have to bite back my laughter. “I’m seven now!”
“Seven, huh?” Chase’s face relaxes, and he crouches down so they’re at the same level. “You sure? I thought you were twenty.”
“No, silly.” Kyle chuckles, shaking his head. “I’m not that old.”
“I guess not. Still, seven is an important birthday.” Chase nods seriously and extends his fist to him. “Happy birthday, bud.”
“Thank you.” Kyle’s grin grows wider as he bumps his fist against Chase’s. “Mom promised me we can go and play mini golf for my birthday. Are you and Shadow coming with us?”
Chase’s mouth parts in surprise at the invitation. I place my hand on Kyle’s shoulder, and he turns to me.
“This is for you and your friends ? —”
“Chase is my friend. He can come, right?” He shifts his attention to the man in question. “There will also be pizza.”
I press my lips tightly together, and even stoic Chase Williams can’t resist it. The corner of his mouth twitches upward. The motion is small, but it’s certainly there.
“Pizza, you say?”
Kyle nods. “With pepperoni. No mushrooms.” His nose furrows. “I don’t like mushrooms.”
Chase nods and leans forward slightly as if he’s telling him a secret. “I don’t like mushrooms either.”
“Mom likes mushrooms.” They both look at me with matching disgusted expressions on their faces. It’s uncanny to see them like that, so similar. “See? Even Chase doesn’t like them.”
“I’ll let you know, mushrooms are healthy.”
“They’re yucky.” Kyle turns to Chase, a hopeful expression on his face. “So, are you coming?”
Chase Williams has one very fine ass.
I bite the inside of my cheek as I watch him lean down and correct Kyle’s posture, making sure he’s holding the golf stick—is that what it’s called? I have no idea—before crouching down in front of him so he can explain to him how to play properly.
Shadow huffs out a breath, leaning her head on her paws. Today she’s wearing her working vest, and for the first time since I’ve met her, she’s on a leash, something the girl at the register insisted on.
“I know, girl, I know,” I whisper, placing my hand on her head and rubbing her between her ears as we watch the boys play.
Kyle nods decisively, so Chase stands up and takes a step back.
Kyle leans forward like Chase showed him, glancing at him for approval.
His face is serious, tongue peeking out the side of his mouth as he focuses on the little white ball and shoots.
The ball flies past the hole and sails all the way to the other side.
Kyle’s head lowers, his shoulders slump slightly in obvious disappointment. Chase places his hand on his back and waits until Kyle lifts his gaze before telling him something. Kyle moves to the ball, taking the position once again, and shoots, this time gentler, so the ball falls into the hole.
The boys cheer for him, exchanging high-fives before Levi takes Kyle’s position, and then Gage. Chase stands by their side, giving advice and correcting them when necessary.
He’s so good with him, with all of them, really.
Chase might be rough around the edges, but he’s more caring and patient than any other man I know.
It’s impossible not to notice how Kyle seeks him out, asks for his advice, and wants for his approval.
It should terrify me. That bond that has grown between them.
My little man’s heart was broken one too many times as is, and yet I can’t bring myself to tell him no when he’s so clearly excited.
A woman slows down as she passes by, a tray with drinks in her hand, her gaze going to Chase and taking him in. Our gazes meet as she looks away, a smile forming on her lips.
“You’re a lucky woman. I wish my husband was as good with our kids.”