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“Very good,” Enfys commended, and Bel released a whimper-like noise.

“Oh my gods.” Gem shook Rusty’s arm. “Rusty, oh my gods.”

“Shut up,” Rusty hissed, using his free hand to cover Gem’s mouth.

Enfys spared them an amused glance before she patted Bel’s cheek, just shy of too hard, before popping her lollipop back into her mouth. “Best go inside before anyone sees your erection. Wouldn’t want the neighbors to talk.”

Then she turned and strutted down the hall, not a care in the world. Bel watched her go, mouth ajar, eyes a little dazed. Gem squeaked, pointing at the obvious hard-on in Bel’s pants .

“He’s actually got a boner,” he hissed in Rusty’s ear, but even at a whisper, Bel heard him.

The spell Enfys had cast shattered, and Belami blinked, then glanced down in horror at the tent in his pants. He snarled wordlessly at Gem, revealing the tiniest little fangs before he stumbled into his flat and slammed the door.

“Oh em geez, that was the best going away present I could have ever asked for,” Gem cried, releasing the death grip he’d had on Rusty’s arm to chase after Enfys. “Enfys, you’re a queen! A goddess. I used to want to be Tad when I grew up, but now, I want to be you.”

Flicking her hair over her shoulder, Enfys struck a pose and smiled grandly. “Of course you do, precious. I’m iconic.”

“You’re something,” Rusty said flatly, and she arched a thin eyebrow at him. “Did you have to go so hard? You nearly made him bust a nut in his jeans.”

“Oh, trust me, I could have gone harder, but I would never do that without his express consent,” Enfys sniffed haughtily as she stepped into the lift. “He’s going to be a fun little project, though. I think I’ll fuck him.”

“You should. I’m pretty sure he’s hella pent up,” Gem said as they followed her into the elevator.

“Thanks again for putting in a good word with the landlord,” Enfys said as they started their descent. “I’m gonna like it here. I can already tell.”

“And I know from personal experience that all the surfaces bolted down in that flat are durable as fuck,” Gem said, rubbing the notch in Rusty’s ear suggestively. “Rusty helped me double-check.”

Enfys laughed. “Good to know.”

At the new flat, Rusty directed everyone on where to put stuff as Gem did more of the manual labor.

He complained the whole time, but since he was one of the strongest, it would have been illogical for him not to carry the heavy items. Granted, Dex and Krul were having a competition for who could carry the most boxes—or the heaviest objects?

Rusty wasn’t sure—so Gem easily let them do more of the work.

As Rusty, Oliver, Enfys, and Toni put the bed frame back together, Liel stood to the side and gave instruction. He pointed and said things like, “Try twisting it counter-clockwise,” or, “Just lift it up and push,” and, “You’re making it harder than it needs to be.”

“Do you wanna get down here and do it, babe?” Oliver asked, voice strained.

Liel looked mildly affronted before he schooled his features and smiled. “No, you’re doing such a good job. I would just get in the way.”

“That’s what I thought,” Oliver muttered as he fastened one of the feet to the box frame.

“Hey, so the truck’s empty, and half the boxes are already unpacked,” Gem puffed as he leaned against the doorframe. “I was thinking of ordering some food to feed everyone.”

“Okay, sure. I could eat,” Rusty said as he, Toni, and Oliver settled the mattress on the frame.

Enfys sighed in relief. “Good to know it’ll hold.”

“Remains to be seen,” Gem said with an obnoxious wink, and Toni made a noise of disgust.

“I heard they opened a pizza place. Like a human pizza place.” Oliver wiped sweat from his brow. “I could go for some.”

“Pizza?” Bryce asked as he walked in carrying Walter. “That sounds amazing. Also, where do I put the stuffed cow?”

“Unholy shit, that’s a big cow,” Enfys said .

Toni propped his hands on his hips and wrinkled his nose. “You still got that?”

“Yes, now stop judging me!” Gem snapped.

“I heard someone say something about pizza,” Jude said as he appeared in the doorway, trailed by Glyma, Quin, and Dex.

“Ah, I tried that pizza stuff, and it is dope!” Dex said, a tuft of fur poking through the hole of his backward ballcap. “Whoa, that is a big ass plushie, my man.”

“Awesome, let’s get everyone in here to ask their opinions on Walter,” Gem muttered, raking a frustrated hand through his sweaty curls.

“His name is Walter?” Glyma pressed her hands to her chest. “That’s adorable.”

“Why is everyone in the bedroom?” Willow asked from behind Glyma and Quin, forcing them to step into the room as well to make more space. Krul trailed her, his Incubus tail wrapped around her waist.

“We’re ordering food,” Rusty said.

“And talking about Walter, Gem’s ginormous cow stuffie,” Oliver added unhelpfully.

“He’s very cute,” Willow said, before patting Krul’s arm. “Can you fetch Cya and Zef for us, darling? It appears we are discussing food options. Has anyone seen Tad?”

“We can go to them,” Gem said, numerous hands trying to usher everyone out of the bedroom.

“I’m already here,” Tad said as the vent in the ceiling popped open, making everyone jump. Her webbed feet emerged, legs dangling as her bulbous eyes stared down at them from the darkness of the heating duct.

“What are you doing in there?” Rusty demanded .

Tad scowled. “Checking for cameras and listening devices. Why else would I be up here?”

“What?” Gem and Rusty cried simultaneously.

“I got Cya and Zef,” Krul said.

“I don’t think there’s room in there,” Cya said.

“Perhaps we should wait in the hall,” Zef said.

“No, we’ll make space for you, Zef,” Bryce said hurriedly, passing Walter off to Gem as everyone shifted and shuffled until they all crowded into the bedroom.

At Tad’s barked command, Zef glided gracefully to the open vent, reaching up with their top hands to assist Tad safely to the ground.

The Anura shot Rusty another glower, clearly offended at his lack of appreciation for her “debugging” of the flat.

Gem quickly fixed the ceiling vent back into place with two hands as he hugged Walter close with several others.

“So what’s with the stuffed cow?” Enfys asked as she leaned against the wall, wings spread open wide to keep them from being crushed.

“Can we get pepperoni?” Bryce said. “Or the demon equivalent?”

“It’s just a stuffie,” Gem dismissed.

“Are there vegetarian options?” Willow asked.

“Do you sleep with him?” Oliver asked.

“Seems counterintuitive since you have your own live plushie to sleep with,” Jude said, pointing at Rusty.

Rusty had never been more offended. “Watch it!”

“Noice, babe,” Toni said, giving Jude an air high-five from across the room.

“I think pizza comes in many varieties,” Quin said, and Willow nodded in relief.

“I don’t sleep with him.” Gem hugged Walter tighter. “I just hug him when I’m sad, and he makes me feel better. At least, I used to, but now I just hug Rusty instead.”

Glyma awwed . “That’s beautiful.”

“Where will you put him?” Zef asked.

“There isn’t much space,” Cya said.

“Probably because we’re all here,” Dex said, propping an arm on Cya’s shoulder. “Once we leave, Walter will have, like, all the space.”

The Sypent gave Dex a revolted look as they shoved his arm off their shoulder. Entirely unaware of their discomfort, Dex just laughed and propped his opposite arm on Jude’s head at this other side.

“Bro, you’re, like, the best size for this,” he said.

Jude rolled his eyes and said flatly, “I aim to please.”

“I don’t know what pizza is, but I need food or else I’m gonna start burning shit,” Tad said.

“You know what? I’m just gonna put him in the corner, and we can decide on lunch,” Gem said, propping Walter in the corner of the room, facing the bed.

Fisting his paws on his hips, Rusty shook his head. “Uh, you can’t put him there.”

Gem blinked in a wave from left to right. “Why not?”

Rusty gestured toward the bed frame. “He’s staring right at our bed.”

“Aw, are you shy?” Enfys teased.

“Oh my gods, he is kind of shy, and it’s totes adorbs,” Gem said.

Rusty growled a warning that no one heeded.

“Ha, Rusty’s too embarrassed to fuck Gem in front of the cow stuffie,” Jude said.

“Wait, do you really not to want to fuck me in front of Walter?” With a giggle, Gem rubbed the back of Rusty’s neck. “He would never judge us, you know?”

“Maybe this is a conversation you two should have when we’re not in the room?” Oliver suggested.

“Speak for yourself,” Tad said.

“I agree with Ollie,” Toni said.

“So, was it a no on pizza?” Bryce asked.

“If it means leaving before this conversation devolves into chaos, I volunteer myself to pick-up the food order,” Zef said.

Picking a piece of lint out of Zef’s hair without touching their skin, Bryce said, “Oh, I’ll go with you!”

Zef’s wings buzzed, their antennas trembling as they said, “Alright.”

“No, Gem,” Rusty said, fighting to keep his voice even. “As shocking as it seems, I don’t want to fuck you in front of the cow.”

“You know, you could put the cow on the bed,” Jude suggested unhelpfully. “Then you can fuck Gem with the cow.”

“Or on the cow,” Liel added.

“Or you could remove the stuffing and put the cow on like a suit,” Enfys said with an evil grin, “and fuck Gem as the cow.”

“No!” Rusty cried in horror.

Gem laughed. “What? That would be ridiculous. I mean… well, that’s…” His expression turned contemplative, eyes glossy over like he was picturing it. “No, that’s just silly. It’s… it would be so…” He drifted off again, gaze darting to Rusty. “Well—”

“I am not putting on that cow,” Rusty gritted out between clenched teeth.

“I always thought the Araknis was into some weird shit,” Tad said .

“Maybe we should leave for this conversation,” Glyma whispered to Quin.

“I don’t know how we haven’t gotten sued yet, if I’m being honest,” Quin said.

“You have strange friends,” Liel said, and Oliver nodded.

“I’m fully aware of that.”

“I am very uncomfortable with this whole situation,” Zef lamented.

“Agreed,” Cya said.

Willow worried her bottom lip. “It isn’t our place to shame Rusty and Gem for their sex life. They’re both consenting adults.”

“I’m not,” Rusty whined. “I’m not consenting.”

“Prude alert,” Dex sniggered, causing Cya to roll their eyes.

“About the pizza,” Bryce tried again.

“He is about the right size.” Gem scrutinized Walter and Rusty simultaneously, deep in thought.

Okay, Rusty was genuinely growing concerned now. “I’m not wearing that cow, Gem!”

“Of course not.” Gem beamed at him, smile too sweet and innocent. “Never going to happen.”

He winked one large eye, and Rusty’s stomach dropped to his toes. “Don’t wink! Then they’ll think you’re lying.”

“Don’t be silly. I’d never make you wear a cow suit,” Gem said, adding another wink.

“Stop it!” Rusty cried, hugging his tail as he backed away.

“For completely unrelated reasons,” Gem said as he faced their group of friends, “I’m going to have to ask you all to leave. Thank you so much for helping us move; we are forever grateful.”

“But what about the food?” Enfys demanded .

“Yeah, we need to feed them,” Rusty insisted.

Gem sent him another saccharine smile before he ushered everyone from the bedroom. “Thank you so much for your help. We owe you one, for sure. But I must insist.”

“No, don’t leave me alone with him!” Rusty begged as they filed out of the bedroom one by one.

“Ignore him. He’s fine,” Gem reassured them. “Okay, bye now. Buh-bye. Thanks again. Hugs and kisses. Bye!”

“Well, this is bullshit,” Tad pouted as she crawled up Zef’s body and settled on their shoulders. “I wouldn’t have helped if I knew they wouldn’t feed us.”

“Yeah, it’s kinda rude,” Jude agreed.

“Trust me, bitesize, we don’t wanna stick around,” Toni whispered urgently.

“I’m not wearing the cow!” Rusty shouted as everyone gathered in the living area and retrieved their coats and shoes. “I won’t.”

“Ashari, we both know how this is gonna end.” Cupping his face in his top hands, Gem rubbed his shoulders and arms with the others and smiled eerily down at him. “Don’t fight it. Just give in.”

“Oh, he’s actually gonna do it?” Enfys said, sounding half-impressed, half-disturbed. “Does it make me a creep that I kind of want to watch?”

“Yes,” numerous people said, and she shrugged, unaffected by the judgment as they all disappeared down the entry hall, the front door shutting a moment later.

“I’m not wearing it. You can’t make me,” Rusty seethed, and Gem leaned in, rubbing his cheek against Rusty’s and a thumb down Rusty’s throat.

“But it’ll be so good,” he purred in his ear. “I’ll eat your ass, just the way you like, and then I’ll open myself up on your cock. Just imagine how tight and wet my pussy’ll feel.”

Rusty’s resolve cracked. “That’s not fair.”

“And I want you to bite my shoulder hard enough to break skin, hard enough to scar, so everyone knows I’m yours,” Gem continued. “All you have to do is wear a sexy, silly little cow suit. It’s not that hard, right?”

“I hate you,” Rusty whimpered, eyes shuttering closed as Gem rubbed the base of his tail.

“Good. Bring that energy to the bedroom. We have to test how durable the bed frame is,” he whispered, giving Rusty’s tail a firm stroke. “I’ll be waiting.”

Leaving Rusty standing in the living room surrounded by half-unpacked boxes with a raging boner, Gem sashayed toward the bedroom, leaving articles of his clothing in a trail behind him.

Thankfully, everyone had vacated the flat, so there was no one to witness Rusty’s humiliation as he slumped in defeat and stalked after his infuriating anymkara.

Rusty was going to fuck Gem until neither of them could walk straight, but he was never, in this life or any other, going to wear that godsdamned cow!