Page 33
Chapter fifteen
What a Bitch
Rusty
As the lunch rush started to ebb, a body shifted on the other side of the bakery case, and someone tapped on the glass. Rusty rose from his crouch, finding a familiar Lepid standing there. She looked different in the daylight, dressed in fashionable but significantly more modest clothing.
Her pale gray skin contrasted with her dark, compound eyes and her large, frilled antennas that Rusty thought might have been a dark orange or maybe brown. The fingers of her four hands looked dipped in the same color, along with her fuzzy wings, though they were outlined in stark black.
“I was told, should I ever be in the neighborhood, that I could stop in for a free meal,” Enfys said airily as she finger-waved at him. “And maybe some company. I hear you’re the one to talk to about that?”
With a dry chuckle, Rusty smacked the towel he’d been using to clean the glass onto his shoulder. “I’m not off for another hour, so the company has to wait. But I can deliver on that meal.”
She flipped her black hair over her shoulder dramatically. “Well, I’m a busy girl, so I’ll take the food to go and a rain check on the company.”
“I can do that,” Rusty said, checking the short queue of customers Oliver was helping at the register.
Behind the espresso machine, Gem was working on several drinks at once, but two of his small eyes were locked on Rusty and Enfys, thin brows furrowed. When he saw Rusty watching him, he jerked his head away and focused on the dairy he was steaming.
Turning back to Enfys, Rusty gestured for her to wait off to the side of the register. “So what brought you to Purgatory?”
“Work,” she said, wings fluttering lazily behind her back. “I had a… business meeting on the other side of the veil.”
Rusty chuckled quietly. “Oh? I don’t think Miss Emyra would like that.”
Clicking her tongue, she waved a blasé hand. “I don’t work for her no more. I’m my own girl now. You inspired me.”
“Oh yeah?”
Nodding, she fluttered her lashes, dropping her voice even quieter as she propped her lower arm on the counter separating them. “As it turns out, the humans are fucking horny for us. They’ll pay just about anything. Travel, lodging, food. They’re desperate, poor dears. Horribly repressed.”
This, Rusty knew. He was chronically online, so he’d fallen down many an internet blackhole in his day.
“Glad it’s working out for you.”
Antennas trembling with amusement, she shrugged. “It’s a living.”
“Well,” Rusty said, lowering the volume of his voice to match hers, “if you ever wanna serve cunt on your feet instead of on your back, we’re always accepting applications. ”
With a boisterous laugh, Enfys reached over the counter to smack his arm, but he danced out of the way with another snicker. “You insult me!” she sniffed haughtily before striking a pose. “I can serve cunt in any position, precious, even if I don’t actually have one.”
“I believe you,” Rusty said, and the Lepid giggled.
Rusty thought he heard an angry hum vibrate from Gem’s direction, but when he checked, the Araknis was concentrating on the foam art he was creating.
To Enfys, he said, “Here at The Passing Through Cafe, you can serve both coffee and cunt all you want, I promise.”
Enfys rolled her eyes. “But I bet I won’t get paid half as good, and a girl’s gotta eat. I have expensive taste, you know?”
“Still, if you change your mind, I can put in a good word for you,” Rusty offered as the last customer in line moved toward the other end of the counter.
“Aw, you’re cute,” Enfys said with a boop to his nose with one hand. Another hand snapped and pointed at his pants. “Phone. Now.”
She wiggled her fingers expectantly, and Rusty chuffed but handed his phone over. Orange-tipped fingers flying, she typed in her contact info before reaching over the counter and slipping his phone back into his pocket herself, winking obnoxiously.
“For that rain check on company,” she whispered, and this time, Rusty was sure Gem’s fur hummed a warning.
Again, when he checked, Gem was pointedly not looking at him, and he scratched his ear awkwardly. “Right. Rain check.” Clearing his throat, he knocked Oliver’s arm. “I’ll take this one,” he said in English, and the human gawked.
“Seriously?” he asked, and Rusty nodded. “But you never voluntarily take orders. ”
“Well, this one’s a friend,” he said, and Enfys draped herself over the counter with a simper.
“ Very good friends.” She extended a hand to Oliver, who took it automatically, brows so high they nearly disappeared into his hair. “I’m Enfys. And who are you, precious?”
“Oliver,” Oliver said.
“Oliver,” she mouthed at Rusty before daintily shaking Oliver’s hand. “Pleasure.”
“Nice to meet yo—ah!”
Oliver was forced to release Enfys’s hand as Gem shoved in between him and Rusty with a forceful, “Hi, I’m Gem.
How great is this, meeting one of Rusty’s friends!
He’s never talked about you before, which is so weird because we hang out all the time, yet your name’s never come up. It’s just so amazing to meet you.”
He finished his speech with a rather unhinged smile, offering his top right hand for her shake. His top left hand landed on Rusty’s head, fingers rubbing around the base of his ear, as his middle left hand came to rest on Rusty’s shoulder.
Enfys’s gaze darted between them a moment before amusement played over her features. She accepted Gem’s handshake with a saccharine smile. “Enfys. Charmed, I’m sure.”
Gem released an unnerving titter through his nose. “M’kay.”
They shook hands for an uncomfortable amount of time, and when they finally parted, Rusty caught the way Enfys flexed her fingers, like Gem may have squeezed them a tad too tight. Gem was still smiling widely, but Rusty could have sworn his fangs had lengthened.
“So how do you two know each other?” he asked, voice overflowing with affectation. “I bet it’s a great story. Or not, because Rusty probably would have told me about it sooner if it was. Which he didn’t. He’s actually never mentioned you.” All at once, Gem’s smile dropped. “Not once.”
Oliver stood at Gem’s side, eyes wide and confused. Enfys’s wings opened and closed slowly behind her back, her wide, fluffy antennas flicking. Rusty gaped up at Gem, but the Araknis ignored him, continuing to massage his ear unfairly.
“Oh, you know, how does anyone meet anyone nowadays?” Enfys said with a mischievous grin. “I was working one night, and Rusty needed some help. So I… helped him out. Ain’t that right, Rusty?”
“That’s one way to say it,” he hedged, and Gem’s hand on his shoulder tightened.
“Well, isn’t that just the greatest,” Gem said, sounding like it was the farthest thing from great he could think of. “How wonderful that that happened, and now you’re here. Which is just… Well, it’s just…”
“Great?” Enfys offered, and Gem nodded exuberantly, lips pinched in a tight line as he hummed.
“Mhm, so… great.”
“Gem?” Rusty said, and several small eyes swiveled in his direction.
“Yes, Rus?” he asked, large eyes locked on the Lepid.
“Are you gonna let me take her order?”
“Of course,” he said, another deranged grin slashing across his face.
“There’s nothing in this dimension I want more than that, so I’ll just get out of your way.
” He gestured vaguely toward the espresso machine.
“I’ll be right over there. And you two will be here while Rusty takes your order. Purposely and voluntarily.”
Enfys nodded slowly, her proboscis dancing along her small teeth. “Great.”
Another manic titter from Gem. “So great. ”
“I thought you were going on your break,” Rusty asked, and Gem’s hand on his shoulder tightened again, nearly making him wince.
“I have to clean the espresso machine first.”
“But you just cleaned it,” Rusty said, and the look Gem leveled on him sent a genuine thrill of terror through his veins.
“Then I guess I missed a part.” Gem pinched the notch in his ear. Firmly. “So I’m gonna go take care of that right now. Is that a problem?”
“No,” Rusty whispered, and Gem patted the top of his head before he turned on his heels and stalked back to the espresso machine.
Oliver scrambled out of the way in alarm, taking refuge against the back counter.
He exchanged a look of bewilderment with Rusty, who could only manage a slight shake of his head and a half-shrug in return.
He had no idea what had gotten the Araknis pissed off, but he wasn’t going to get in his way.
Gem could be scary when he wanted to be.
“Uh, so that’s Gem,” Rusty said, and Enfys pressed several fingers of her upper right hand to her mouth. “He’s normally really friendly.”
With a cock of her head, she watched Gem grab the portafilter, carry it to the trash can, then practically beat the thing against the lip of plastic. “I’ll take your word for it.”
“No, really. He is. Usually,” Rusty said as Gem shook a piece of metal free from the machine and banged it against the counter. “I don’t know what’s gotten into him.”
“I think he was just marking his territory,” she said as she propped herself on her lower elbows.
Rusty blinked. “What?”
Confused herself, she studied him a moment before understanding dawned. “Oh, gods, you poor, oblivious thing.” She placed a hand on his wrist, like she was comforting someone after a great loss, and something clattered violently from Rusty’s right, making him jump.
Gem had cleaned that damn espresso machine every day for six years, and Rusty had never once heard him make this amount of noise while doing it.
“Anyway,” Rusty said, moving his hand out from under the Lepid’s. “What can I get for you?”
Enfys placed her order—sans drink, which Rusty figured was probably a good idea—and he pulled out his wallet and shoved enough bills into the register to cover it. More metallic rattling from Gem grated on Rusty’s ears, but he ignored it as best he could.
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33 (Reading here)
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 49
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 71
- Page 72
- Page 73