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Chapter thirty-two

Friendsgiving

Gem

A week later, at Oliver and Jude’s insistence, everyone gathered at the cafe on Sunday to celebrate a human holiday called, “Friendsgiving.” Oliver had explained what it was, but if Gem was being honest, he’d been distracted at the time by Rusty’s poochy belly and the memory of riding him on the couch the night before while he held on to those delicious love-handles. So, he’d missed the explanation.

Apparently, it was mostly about hanging out with family and eating good food, and since Gem loved both those activities, he was fully on board.

So he rode the train to Purgatory, carrying his contribution to the day’s festivities.

Disposable plates, cups, and cutlery, along with some food items and decorations.

Gem wasn’t sure what the decorations were for until he walked into the cafe and saw a very large tree in the corner. It wasn’t a tree he’d ever seen before, so he assumed Oliver had brought it over from the human dimension. Spiky, green bristles covered the branches, but it smelled nice .

“Why is there nature in here?” Gem asked as he set the box of decor on one of the three circular cafe tables that had been shoved together to form one large table.

“It’s a Christmas tree,” Oliver said, nearly vibrating with excitement. “It’s a human tradition to decorate one in the month of December, and Glyma said we could do it here. It was a nightmare getting it over the border, though.”

“Yes, but I got it done,” Liel said haughtily, and Oliver beamed down at the Gymnot, giving him a hearty kiss.

“You did, babe, and it was very sexy.”

Electricity popped between Liel’s fingers as he grinned, revealing sharp teeth. “Oh it was, was it?”

Oliver nodded and kissed him again, and Gem grimaced as their pheromones thickened around him. “You two are cute but gross. I’m gonna go somewhere else now.”

In the kitchen, he found Rusty emptying a grocery bag of food items onto the steel table, and Gem bounded over and kissed the top of his head in greeting. Glancing up at him, Rusty smiled, and it filled Gem’s chest with gooey warmth.

“Hey, you,” he said.

“Hey,” Rusty said, giving Gem’s hand a squeeze before he continued emptying his bag of ingredients.

Glyma, Toni, Jude, and Zef were already cooking away.

Something gamey and savory was baking in the oven—Jude called it a turkey—and Toni was cooking gidym root for a mash.

As Tad sat on the edge of the table, stealing bites, Zef prepared a breading mixed with vegetables that was going to be stuffed into the turkey’s carcass for some insane reason.

“I don’t want to eat food out of a dead animal’s asshole,” Gem said .

“You eat ass all the time,” Toni snorted.

“Yeah, but not dead ass. Alive ass only. I may have very few deal-breakers when it comes to ass-eating, because it’s one of my favorite activities, but the ass being attached to a live person is one of them,” Gem said, petting Rusty between his ears when the Pyclon frowned up at him.

“And by person, I mean you. Because we’re in a committed, monogamous relationship and your ass is the only one I want to eat. ”

Both Rusty and Toni groaned at his words, but it was Jude who spoke.

“Don’t talk about eating Rusty’s ass in front of Toni or else he’ll start manically baking manicotti again.

And we already have way too much. Our freezer is full.

” His eyes widened emphatically. “Seriously, we can’t fit anymore in our kitchen, and it has to stop. ”

“Don’t stifle me, Jude,” Toni cried. “It’s my process!”

“ Manicotti isn’t a euphemism for something, is it?” Rusty asked with a sneer. “Because if it is, I don’t want to know what for.”

“Says the guy whose boyfriend is openly talking about eating his ass,” Jude slapped back, and Rusty’s tail puffed up.

“Not because I want him to!” Rusty said, and Gem gasped dramatically.

“Okay, you loved it; don’t even try and deny it.” Gem turned to the others with a smug grin. “No one had ever done it to him before, and I blew his mind. It was awesome.”

“Gem!” Rusty barked, and Gem cringed.

“Sorry, I know I promised not to tell people about our sex life, but it’s hard because our sex life is amazing.

I just want everyone to know we’re both having great orgasms. Like, for real,” Gem insisted as everyone—except Tad—grimaced, “I’m pretty sure we’ve torn a hole in the space-time continuum at least once. ”

Tad swung her legs and smiled. “Nice. ”

“Keep talking about it, and I’m gonna leave you to deal with that hole alone,” Rusty growled out, and Gem pressed several hands to his chest.

“Don’t you dare threaten me or my hole,” he said, glaring down at the Pyclon. Rusty glared back, and Gem withered first. “Ugh, fine. Forget what I said earlier. Rusty and I never have sex, and even when we do, it’s the worst, apparently.”

Rusty rubbed the space between his eyes. “You could just not talk about it at all.”

“I agree with that sentiment,” Toni interjected.

“As do I,” Zef said.

“But everyone loves my sex stories,” Gem said.

“Do we, though?” Jude asked.

“Speak for yourself,” Tad said.

“Then tell them sex stories that don’t involve me,” Rusty said.

“But all my best ones involve you,” Gem said, and Rusty cocked his head, one ear folding down.

“Really?”

Rubbing several hands over Rusty’s head and shoulders, Gem nodded. “Um, duh. Our sex is so fire; of course, my best stories are now our best stories.”

A reluctant smile curled the corners of his mouth. “Oh. Cool.”

“Aw, somehow, this turned out very sweet,” Glyma said.

The kitchen doors opened, and Bryce popped his head inside. “Hey, Gem, could I borrow your height really quick?”

Rusty followed Gem and Bryce out of the kitchen toward the Christmas tree where Quin, Oliver, and Liel were decorating.

Cya—one of the younger closers—must have arrived while Gem was in the kitchen because they were now watching the decoration ceremony with narrowed eyes.

Their long curtain of deep green hair looked almost black against their bronze skin, but the ends were brighter green, matching the iridescent scales on their lower body.

They wore a fashionable tunic common amongst Sypents—since they had a tail instead of legs—and their arms were adorned with bangles that clanged every time they moved.

Their face was angular and striking, but cold in a way Gem associated with most high-society Pride dwellers.

Why Cya worked here, Gem had no idea, but it did pique his curiosity.

Unfortunately, Cya was very closed off, and the one time Gem had tried to get them to spill the tea, they’d rebuffed him.

But that was okay. He was nothing if not tenacious.

“Hey, Cya, I didn’t know you were coming today,” Gem said, and Cya blinked up at him with a bored expression.

“Glyma invited me,” they said in their posh Pride accent.

“As well she should have; we’re so happy to have you.” This time, they didn’t respond at all, just another bored blink, and Gem’s smile dimmed. “Well, aren’t you just a bucket of sunshine today? You’ll have to excuse me. Bryce needs to borrow my height.”

After putting the star ornament on top of the tree, Gem decorated the highest branches with Bryce while Quin, Oliver, Liel, and Rusty decorated the lower branches.

When Willow and Krul arrived, Willow joined the cooking team while Krul chatted animatedly with Cya.

Cya stood stiff as a board, giving one word answers as Krul rambled.

Enfys arrived last, and Gem was only slightly annoyed at her presence.

He could admit to himself that his jealousy was petty and unfounded, and her coming to his rescue that night at Zef’s with the whole butthole-debacle had done wonders in improving their relationship.

But there was still a part of him that twinged with envy when he thought about how she understood Rusty’s experience in ways he never could.

And yes, he was jealous of her style and overall magnetic aura, but she was growing on him. She was badass and beautiful, and he appreciated both of those qualities. Plus, she was a good friend to Rusty, and how could Gem begrudge either of them for that?

“Is there a reason we’re covering a tree with balls?” Enfys asked, her orange wings flitting lazily open and closed as her antennas flattened in what Gem referred to as her “resting bitch antenna.”

“It’s a human tradition, apparently,” Gem said. “I think it’s used to ward off an evil spirit that crawls into people’s homes through something called a chimney. They have to leave it milk and cookies as an offering so it doesn’t eat their children or something. Isn’t that horrifying?”

“I don’t think that’s the story,” Rusty said as he hung a peppermint-flavored cane on a lower branch.

“I’m pretty sure it is,” Gem said.

As Enfys took Rusty’s place decorating, Gem grabbed Rusty’s hand and dragged him away from the others, dropping his voice to a whisper. “So, I have a surprise for you.”

“What? Why?” Rusty asked, whiskers twitching in curiosity.

“I finally figured out what to give you for your birthday.” Gem wriggled in excitement, bouncing on his toebeans.

With a laugh, Rusty crossed his arms over his chest. “My birthday was months ago, and I told you I didn’t want anything.”

“Bup, bup, bup,” Gem shushed him. “And I told you that I was going to get you a present anyway. It just took me a while to decide.”

“Okay,” Rusty surrendered after a moment, and Gem squealed in excitement and bent down to kiss him briefly.

When he started unbuttoning his shorts, Rusty chittered and intervened. “What are you doing? If you want to give me a sexy present for my birthday, that’s fine, but not in front of our coworkers.”

“It’s not a sexy present. Well, maybe you’ll think it’s sexy, but that’s not—ugh, can I just show you?” At Rusty’s hesitation, Gem huffed. “I’m not taking my clothes off. I just have to loosen my shorts because they’re hella tight.”