Page 42 of Love Me Knot, Part One (Knotty Omegas #1)

“The boys wanted to prove they were serious. Daphne’s a little skittish.”

“Considering your exes, I imagine that could’ve been a bonding point for the two of you.”

Winter: 2. Me: 0.

Jace coughs into his hand, looking away when Win glares. “What about employment? Is she financially independent?”

“She owns her own business and is opening a brick-and-mortar store downtown.” My throat constricts and I have to swallow hard as I remember the way Daph spoke about her mom. “Her family situation seems unpleasant.”

Win hums, not commenting. “Does she own the store itself or the building?”

“I don’t know.” The more questions he asks, the more I realize that even in her heat, Daphne only offered the barest peeks at herself. Stories about her friends and her store. Nothing significant outside that.

Nothing we could use against her. Considering what I did with the first shred of information I found, that was pretty fucking smart.

My friends share a glance and Win settles in his seat. “Have you even discussed anything beyond courtship? Where does she want to live? What does her future look like? Does she want children, or will she be happy with a house full of birds?”

“I’m allergic to birds,” I choke, struggling through my racing pulse. Why can’t we take this one step at a point?

“You’re making my point, Connor. Your pack decided on a flighty omega—one you later found out is in the middle of a dissolution battle—without considering the consequences. Did you learn nothing from your divorce?”

It’s a sobering thought; one followed by a wave of anger so potent my vision whites out.

“Daphne isn’t like Shelby,” I growl. “She’s not the type to try to destroy our future because she can’t be in it.”

As soon as I say it, I know exactly what he’s doing. Forcing me to acknowledge what I’ve been avoiding, what my packmates have said.

Daphne isn’t Shelby, but I’ve been treating her like she is.

Winter: 3. Me: 0.

Game over.

My pulse settles and I toss an arm over my face, groaning. “You’re a dick, you know that?”

“I do. It’s what makes me the big bucks.” Win sits back with his smug fucking grin, though it disappears fast. “You have a pre-bond that she can sign to protect your assets. What others concerns do you have with this omega?”

These men are my friends, the people who’ve always been there for me outside my pack. If I can’t be honest with them, there’s no one to hear my truth. “I don’t want her to break us apart.”

“Seems to me that the only person who can do that is you, Connor.”

“Harsh, but true.” Jace leans over, careful to maintain space between us while I’m emotionally volatile.

“I’ll never understand how difficult the divorce was, but I can tell you with a high level of certainty that if you let it interfere with this new relationship, it will destroy you.

Shelby may be gone, but she’s left wounds you need to heal before getting too deep with this woman. ”

“How do I do that?”

“Tell her everything.”

My first instinct is to rear back, to step away. “Daphne doesn’t need to know.”

“She does if you’re interested in a future together.” Winter drops his notepad on the table. “Your pack has chosen Daphne, but that doesn’t mean you have to. You know that it’s not a requirement.”

“We won’t judge, whatever you choose,” Jace adds. “But I think it’s important to know where you stand. For her and for you.”

Do I want to go back to my boring life while Nate and Dez find love and move on without me?

Do I want to be on the outside while Daphne becomes the center of their world?

They’ll bond as soon as she lets them, maybe even have kids together.

Babies I’ll help raise because that’s what pack does.

But I’ll always be separate. Sitting in the waiting room for news instead of being with my family.

Could I handle watching my brothers fulfill our dreams without me?

No. Despite my reservations, I know that’s not what I want. Not with Daphne.

I’m in, if she’ll have me. “What do I need to know?”

Winter stares at the fire, gathering his thoughts. “You’re not officially courting, so your legal rights are limited. It gives you some protections against Daphne, should you need them, but very few against her former pack.”

“You think her exes will come after us?” Despite her telling me, I couldn’t read the court report. It felt like an invasion of privacy, and I didn’t want to make things worse.

Head wobbling, Win considers it. “The wrong judge could be persuaded toward alienation of affection.”

Fuck. “They’ll come after our business?”

“Unlikely, but it’s a risk you’ll need to be comfortable taking.”

I hate leaving the fate of the business I’ve worked so hard for in the lap of a someone I don’t know, but isn’t that exactly what’s happening to Daphne already?

Courting us, if that even happens, has the potential to worsen her case, risk her business even more.

How can I ask her for something I won’t do myself?

Maybe this is why she’s so flighty. Not just because she’s been burned, but because she’s trying to protect us from the chaos her exes could cause. I may not know Daphne well, but that seems like something she’d do.

Fuck me all over again. I’m such a dick.

“I’m willing if she is.”

Winter accepts my answer easily. “Inevitable courtship doesn’t give you the right to make medical or financial decisions, so Daphne will need to have a proxy.

When it comes to protecting her and vice versa, there’s a bit of a grey area in the law.

When you’re courting, you’re free to use whatever force necessary to protect each other from imminent harm because instincts go overboard. ”

“I remember, but we’re not courting Daphne.” Yet.

Meeting Shelby in high school was both terrible and perfect.

I found the omega I thought was my forever while dealing with early presentation and the hormone and instinct jumps that came with it.

Anyone who looked at her too long was a threat.

Didn’t get better after we got married, either.

Not having a bond made me extra territorial.

“You know that, but your instincts may not. The law understands that sometimes wires get crossed, but I suggest treading lightly.” Win gives me a hard look. “I’m sure you don’t need the warning, but alphas who show violence early in relationships aren’t seen as stable.”

He’s talking about the OPA. If the Omega Protection Agency thinks Daphne’s in danger, they could take her away. Bar us from bonding her, maybe even give her back to her exes.

The growl shocks me, and I stare down at my rumbling chest.

“Connor,” Winter warns, as if I’m proving him right.

“We’ll keep our cool.”

“You have my number if something comes up. While you’re sorting things out, I’ll look into the exes to make sure we’re prepared for any outcome. Was there anything else?”

My head’s spinning so fast I’m honestly not sure. “No.”

“In that case, I’m going to bed. Lock up when you leave, Jace.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

Winter flips him off as he heads out the door, shoulders slumping with exhaustion just before he’s out of sight.

“Do you feel better?” Jace asks long after the room goes silent.

“Yes and no.” Being able to protect my pack when I couldn’t last time helps but realizing that I’ve made a mistake with Daphne feels pretty awful. I mean, I knew I’d fucked up, but there are so many layers to it now.

Jace pulls me out of my chair and wraps me in a hug. “Start with the truth, Con. If she’s the one, she’ll understand.”

“I’m more worried she’ll decide I’m not worth the energy to try at all.”

He doesn’t say it would be my fault if so, but I know. I just need to see if I can fix things before it’s too late. Forge a new path with Daphne that will hopefully lead us in the direction my pack desires.

When I get home, Dez is in the living room. Drawings litter the page of the sketchbook balanced on his legs. An eye here, a curl there, a freckled shoulder I spent hours looking at.

Daphne.

He smudges around her hairline, then rips the sheet out and lays it on top of the small stack of pages littering the coffee table.

“What’re you doing?”

He doesn’t look up. “Drawing.”

“Why tear them out?” Dez is fastidious about his sketchbooks, always wanting them to stay whole.

“I slipped one under her door and she loved it.”

So, he’s going to keep doing it. Breathing stalled, I wonder if Daphne recognizes the sketches for what they are. Courting presents.

I must’ve been standing there too long because Dez looks up at me, brows twisted. “Where’ve you been?”

“Pack Cole’s.”

He glances at my shaking hands. “You’re going to hurt yourself.”

That would be preferable to hurting someone else.

Sitting next to his sketches, I stare at my fingertips. “I spoke to Winter.”

There’s a long pause before Dez drops the sketchbook, giving me his full attention. “Why?”

“I needed perspective.”

“Did you find it?”

“You and Nate were right. Daphne shouldn’t have had to air out her life like that. It was unfair of me to ask her to. I just didn’t realize it would be this hard.”

Dez and I have always used each other as sounding boards, but there’s so much I’ve kept from him, so much he needs to understand, but I can’t do it.

Maybe when we’re stable again, I’ll tell my brothers everything.

For the first time in a while, I want to share the burden with them.

Want to tell them everything that’s held me back, but I have to fix this first.

He sighs. “Life is hard, Connor. Moving on takes work and you never did it.”

“I moved on.”

“No, you threw yourself into work so no one else could break your heart or your trust. Now that fate’s dropped our omega in your lap, you’re realizing you have no clue what to do, so you’re lashing out.”

“It sounds stupid when you say it like that,” I grumble.

“Actually, it sounds perfectly reasonable, considering your history. Your subconscious is holding onto that old fear as a way to protect you. Instead, it’s ripping the dream right out of your hands. You have to decide if Daphne’s worth the risk of being wrong, Connor. Nate and I already have.”

And they chose her. From the second they met Daphne, my brothers put her first. Meanwhile I hid behind my past and forgot that I’m not the only one with scars.

“I’m going to fix this.”

“For us or for you?” Dez asks.

“For Daphne,” I say, feeling the rightness in my bones. The way I can breathe a little easier.

Because that’s how it should’ve been all along.

I’d rather nurture another heartbreak than miss out on the chance to love Daphne Barnes, even if it terrifies me.

I just have to earn her forgiveness first.