Page 1 of Illicit Games

Chapter One

Iris

I’ve been living in a glass house for the last three years.

I built it brick by brick, with carefully crafted lies.

Each more convincing than the last.

So compelling that even I began to believe them to be true. I forgot the foundation is weak, seconds away from collapsing. While the house is shiny and pretty on the outside, nobody tells you how vulnerable it is at its roots. One attack and the glass walls come crashing down, burying you in the shards of their remains.

I saw it coming from a mile away. What I didn’t see was that it wasn’t a glass house, but a prison. The house might be in pieces, but I was still a prisoner.

The person who could free me is the one I can’t run to.

If confessing to a single lie can cause this much destruction, I can’t imagine what kind of chaos bringing the others to light will cause.

What if Kian knew that for the last three years, every decision I’ve made has been to become a part of his world? That I gulp every bit of info, every morsel of gossip, about him likeit’s my air? That he’s been my sustenance to survive every single day?

He’ll think I’m deluded. Insane. Won’t he?

I can’t even dare to think about his reaction when he learns that the interview was just a cover to gain entry into his company. Will it matter to him that I’m doing it with good intentions? That I’m trying to clear his name?

I’m terrified to know, not that I’d ever get the opportunity.

Because the strings were never in my control.

It was in Nathan’s.

Now I’m nothing but his puppet.

The knowledge cuts deep. He was supposed to be my confidant. A handsome stranger turned my best friend. Then how did he turn into my villain? How did I not see the Machiavelli lurking behind his good-boy persona?

Sitting on the floor of my room in the hostel, I dissect every moment of my life over the last three years. While I was watching Kian, Nathan was watching me.

I’m unable to come to terms with it.

The one time I was brave to put myself out there, and look how it turned out.

Glancing at my phone, several missed calls from Kian glare back at me. He must’ve found my note. Did he believe it? Have I succeeded in pushing him away?

Is he as heartbroken as I am?

After Nathan callously asked me to move out of his place in a bid to create distance between Kian and me, I had no choice but to comply.

I had felt like a ghost as I packed my meager belongings from both apartments. It was a miracle I was able to write a sentence. I just couldn’t leave without an apology.

I’m hopeless. Distraught. Chained.

Of all the scenarios I played in my head where he and I finally ended up together, getting torn apart was never the first chapter of our happily ever after. The agony of never having his warmth is like a live wire inside my body. Like I have ice running in my veins.

The clock reads one in the morning when a knock sounds at my door.

At first, it doesn’t penetrate the numbness in my bones.

The tears dried once I ran out of them during the ride over here. Nathan saw and heard them as he drove, but he never uttered a word. I prayed he would stop and say it was all a prank. But he never did.

Since then, I’ve been feeling like a ghost.