Page 56

TUCKER

J osh’s gaze followed mine as I drew in a nervous breath, glancing down at him, then back up to his face. I could see how scared he was but how sure he was about it, and I wasn’t going to question his courage. I thought for half a second before wrapping my arms around him and lifting him around my hips.

“Tucker,” his voice was low with warning as he got comfortable in my arms.

“Yes, Josh?” I started toward the stairs, not giving him a chance to change his mind. A playful smirk spread across my face, despite how serious what we were about to do really was. “If you’re about to tell me to put you down, don’t waste your breath.”

“What exactly are you doing?” He swallowed tightly, his grip sliding to my hair and tugging roughly in protest.

I reached the top of the stairs and started toward our room, not stopping even as Josh glared at me. I kicked open the door and brought him inside, setting him down on the bed.

“I’m making a point,” I said.

“And what point is that?” He stared up at me from the bed, leaning back on his elbows. His shirt fell open from the few undone buttons, and the sight of his tanned, scarred skin made my breath catch in my throat.

I leaned over him, planting my hands on either side of his head—our faces just inches apart. “The point is…” I started softly, my gaze fixated on his intensely, “that I have never wanted anything more than I want you.”

Josh swallowed roughly, his throat bobbing.

“There’s got to be something you’ve wanted more,” he started to deflect with a joke, and I shut him up with a tiny, needy kiss.

“No, tough guy.” I shook my head, our noses brushing from the motion. “It’s you. It’s just you.” I leaned in and pressed my lips to his in a firm, insistent kiss that felt scolding. I held him there, not giving him time to think—just feel. I needed him present, here with me.

“Okay,” he whispered, breathless. “You’re being ridiculous, though.”

I smiled, the corners of my lips turning upward as I admired his hazy, blown pupils and flushed cheeks. “Maybe I am,” I admitted, shifting my weight so I’m hovering over him. “But you know what?”

“What?” He asked, his fingers playing with the buttons on my shirt, popping them free one at a time.

I leaned over on my knee and sat back, tearing the buttons free and chucking the shirt away, I wanted his focus on me and not the stupid buttons. I looked back at him, affectionately adorning every inch of him. "I don’t care.” I reached out and brushed my fingers through his hair. “I would have waited, but now that you’ve asked, I’m going to make sure that it’s perfect.”

“Stop looking at me like that.” Josh’s hands splayed out over my stomach as I leaned in for more contact, a smirk on his face.

“Like what?” I chuckled, my abs contracting under his gentle touch.

I leaned down, pushing against his resistance and buried my face in his neck, pressing soft kisses to the skin. My lips lingered on his pulse; it raced like a horse beneath his skin, and it only made my own heartbeat more frantic.

“Like you—” he tensed, but his hips arched upward against mine as I climbed over him and straddled his legs.

I pulled back slightly, a knowing smirk on my lips. My fingers traced down his collarbone, pushing the shirt out of my way. “Like I what?” I asked again, more persistently that time. “Like I adore you?” I hummed.

“Yeah, that,” he grumbled, his hips stuttering again as my lips found his skin just below his ear.

I leaned down and kissed him—soft and sure—my hand at his jaw, guiding his gaze back to mine. “I do,” I whispered. “I fucking adore you, Joshua Logan,” I said.

“You say that to all your boyfriends?” Josh joked, but his voice shook, and I could see the effect it had on him.

“Shut up,” I said as I brushed my fingers through his hair.

He inhaled sharply from the simple gesture, looking up at me, no doubt searching my expression for any doubt or hesitation.

“Are you sure about this?” He asked, his voice shaky.

“I’m sure... if you are,” I said gently.

Josh nodded, taking a moment to calm his nerves. He looked at me with love and adoration seeping from him, and I knew in that moment that even if he never said the words out loud, he would always show me. He leaned forward, our mouths colliding in a gentle, loving kiss that I felt all the way down to my toes.

“I’m sure,” he whispered against my lips.

I smiled against his mouth, stealing another from his bottom lip before helping him out of his dress pants and shirt. I undid my own belt, shucking from my pants and staring down at him as my chest rose and fell rapidly.

I had seen him without clothes before, but everything about that moment was different. That time I could touch, I could taste, I could make him mine. A low growl slipped from me as he reached forward, fingers curling into the waistband of my boxers. His eyes darkened as he pushed them down over my hips and ass, letting them fall to the floor. The look in his eyes was intense, darker than I had ever seen them, and it was enough to make my stomach clench tightly under his gaze.

Something in Josh clicked into place, it was like he went from trying to convince himself he could do it to needing it so badly that nothing else mattered. I rose, his hands shaking as he reached for me, he grabbed my hip and guided me back toward the bed gently.

“Tell me what you need,” I said, lying back on the mattress.

“Control,” he whispered, his voice hoarse and tight.

Was that all? I thought, looking up at him, overwhelmed with emotion. I needed to feel every inch of him, needed him to feel just how much I wanted him.

“Take it,” I said, giving him permission. Anything to make him feel comfortable.

Josh let out a soft growl as he settled over me. He spread my legs with his knees, his hands roaming possessively up my chest. He nipped at my jaw, my throat and collarbone. His teeth cool against my hot skin. He was more confident than usual, and it was impossible to contain the pathetic moan that left my lips.

He stopped, his head tilting back, and a smug look appeared on his face.

“Enjoying yourself, Tuck?” He whispered, and all I could do was nod in response.

He huffed darkly, the small nod clearly breaking him a little. I was completely at his mercy, and it was intoxicating. He chuckled against my neck, kissing and biting gently as he committed every inch to memory.

“You should hear yourself.” Josh smiled, his chest rising and falling. His hands traced my side, fingers ghosting over every sensitive spot and drawing more tiny sounds from my lips. “Fuck, Tuck…”

Josh’s breath hitched as he listened to the small noises. It was a relief to see him enjoying himself. His teeth found my neck again, biting harder this time as his hand slid up my thigh and wrapped around me with care. His grip was careful and precise, his strokes slow as he found my ear. “Louder,” he whispered, his breath fanning over my neck.

I couldn’t help the next stuttering moan as he spread my legs wider with his knees and his touch became more possessive, more demanding. He stroked harder, twisting his wrist at the top and eliciting the sharpest sensation of heat in the pit of my stomach.

I pushed my head back into the pillows, arching into his touch, moaning so pathetically I should have been embarrassed, but his touch was so perfect that I knew in that moment I’d never touch myself again without thinking of him.

“Josh,” I breathed out, just trying to control myself.

My heart thundered in my chest. It was clear that he felt the same as he leaned down, his mouth finding mine in a needy, claiming kiss. His fingers kept their steady pace, this thumb pressing against my head.

“Say it for me?” Josh asked. “You’re mine, Tuck, only mine.”

“I’m yours,” I whispered—no hesitation, no fear, just truth.

He groaned softly, his fingers curling around me possessively. I was getting closer, the pressure was building, turning my body tight under his touch. I was a live wire, splintering at the core and completely at his mercy, and all he had done was touch me.

“Look at me,” he demanded gently. "I want to see your face when you fall apart.”

I was teetering on the edge of a full-blown meltdown as my body tightened, trembling under his careful touch. My skin was on fire and my mind was hazy with pleasure as he started to move faster. It was moments of heaving breathing and soft coaxing before I came completely undone in his hand.

Josh caught it, his fingers still gently working me through the aftershocks.. His eyes flickered down to the mess with a proud, satisfied smirk. He adjusted, inhaling me as he positioned himself above me and kissed the sweat from my jaw.

“This was supposed to be about you,” I murmured, fingers threading through his hair as he eased between my legs and notched himself at my entrance.

He looked down at me, his eyes softening, his voice barely audible when he whispered. "It’s about us, Tuck, it’s always about us.”

“I love you,” I said, my heart beating painfully in my chest at the sight of him. He was happy and proud, every scar highlighted on his tanned, sweaty skin; Just begging to be touched.

He leaned down, pressing his forehead against mine as he pushed inside with one slow and gentle thrust. My mouth fell open from the pressure as he sank deeper, his hand squeezing my hip and the other bracing against my bicep. His brows came together with a small stuttering breath as his shaft twitched inside of me.

“I know,” he whispered, his voice cracking as he held himself still and both of us adjusted.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I fought to maintain myself. I felt too full, too complete, too fucking loved . Josh pressed his lips to mine in a soft, gentle kiss as he started to move, his thrusts deep and purposeful.

I was prepared for the kind of sex I always had. With Cael, it was fun, quick and almost always about him. I loved him for who he was and what he needed. He was a giver, but it was always just sex. I’d braced myself for rough and mean—for the anger to bleed into his lust—but I wasn’t prepared for Josh to make love to me . It was soft and slow. Like he wasn’t fighting with himself or just bearing the pain from the contact.

He was enjoying himself.

“Dean, you have to look at me,” he said. "I need that,” his voice was breaking and it demanded my attention because even through his strength he needed my help, and that was okay.

“I’m here,” I whispered. Our eyes locked—and Josh finally exhaled. “It’s me.” I pressed my open hand to his lower back, guiding him deeper with a guttural moan, his hips instinctively responding by pushing harder as he bottomed out against me.

His gaze seared into mine, lit with a kind of heat I’d never seen from him before. Every twitch, every moan was echoed by the sound of our skin coming together. I watched as Josh became dizzy with lust, his thighs tightening and his breaths becoming shorter. His eyes glazed over as he hit that spot again. His lips found mine as he panted my name while his entire body shook around me from the force of his release.

I brushed his sweaty hair from his face as he slowed his pace and tried to catch his breath, his cock still fluttering from his release. My chest clenched as he nuzzled into the touch, his breathing slowly returning to normal. He finally looked up at me, his eyes softer and sated. He peppered soft kisses against my jaw, his skin glowing as he drew his hips out and rolled off of me into the mattress.

Josh pressed a kiss to my lips, his hand coming up to graze my jaw with a smile on his face. “Against the wall,” he ordered under his breath, and I rolled my eyes, moving over so my back was against the cold bedroom wall.

“Are you okay?” I asked him as he got settled.

“Yeah, Tuck.” He put his hand on the mattress between us like he always did, palm down and fingers spread, waiting. I tucked mine in his and he looked down at it. “For once, I’m really okay.”

“Good.” I smiled back. "‘Cause that was fucking insane, and I’m going to need you to do that again…”

Josh surged forward, catching my lips in a quick, smiling kiss. “Shut the fuck up,” he said, but all I heard was compliance, and as I fell asleep with him next to me, all I felt was love.