Page 54

54

BEN

They say the first sign of madness is talking to yourself, and I must be completely bonkers as I’ve been asking the same question to my empty office for the past hour.

“Why now?” I ask again for good measure and reread the email from my lawyer.

He’s dropping the law suit, declined your offer of $2 million, and has signed an affidavit to state he isn’t and will not press criminal charges. He’s also moving out of town. We didn’t even put any legal pressure on him. Looks like you’re in the clear. I’ll send over all the paperwork as soon as it’s done.

Shaking my head, I can’t believe my luck. I thought I was going to have to deal with this arsehole for a long time. That I’d have to fight —and I use that term loosely—for the team I’ve cultivated into an overall success, not counting this season of course, and my Little One all in a week. The gratefulness is palpable, and I blow out a breath just as my office door slams open to reveal a smug and smiling Jenson standing in the frame.

“Again? What do you want now?” I roll my eyes, but the grin toying on my lips lets him see I’m joking.

“I’m tired. All this meddling is thirsty work. Care to join me at Marty’s?”

“Did you do this?” I tip my head at the computer even though he can’t see the email on it.

“If by this you mean saving your sorry ass… I may have lit the match. But it wasn’t me who scared him off.”

“Who?” I hold my breath, hoping for him to say Penelope—because it would mean she cares—and keep my gaze locked on his.

He smiles, folds his arms, leans against the frame, and sighs. “I’m thirsty. I’ll tell you at Marty’s.”

Laughing, I stand and step away from my desk and head toward him. “I take it I’m buying?”

He slaps me on the back as we walk out of the office and Hank gives us a thumbs up.

“He’s not coming?”

Jenson shakes his head and stays quiet. I brush it off, not really thinking anything about it, and letting the relief and gratefulness fill me from the inside. I thought I’d lost all of this, being a part of the Bradys and having them as my family, but apparently not.

“Come on, stop daydreaming about buying me a boat and let’s go.”

“A boat?” Exiting the lifts I stare at him incredulously.

“Yeah. You have a lot of money and I have a lot of fantasies involving me and Angie on our boat. Pirates mainly. Her dressed as a peasant girl and me a pirate with an eye patch. I’d capture her from the land we’d just visited and make her scrub the deck in nothing but rags, barely covering her body. I’d definitely let her clean my spyglass with only her spit, if ya get my drift.”

I try to interrupt, tell him to stop, but he charges ahead and I accept defeat once we’re confined in the small space of the lift.

“Or we’d be lost at sea and need to repopulate the world. She’d hate me for a while and spit out things like, ‘I hate you and your huge muscles.’ And I’d be all like, ‘Of course you do, Kitten,’ knowing full well she’ll be loving it when I have her bent over the bow as I thrust into her stern before the end of the day. I have more if you wanna hear them.”

Shaking my head, I clamp a hand on his shoulder and squeeze to give my next words meaning. “No. Not even a little bit.”

His laughter rings out loudly and garners a few looks our way, but most of the people just smile when they see Jenson.

After a short walk over to Marty’s, he stops and claps me on the back, putting on his best British accent. “Right, we’re here. What do you fancy?”

I roll my eyes at how terrible it sounds, and as we enter the bar, I get a weird feeling in my gut that has nothing to do with his sense of humor. It’s unsettling, and I can’t place it, so I quickly scan my surroundings. A few patrons sit along the wooden bench, watching the TV above their heads and chatting to Marty. My eye catches Angie’s and I take a breath when I spot Penelope sitting with her, a small smile on her lips, her eyes locking on mine, pleading and hopeful.

I snatch my gaze away and turn to Jenson. “What the fuck? I can’t do this. I can’t go back to barely being friends with her after everything, Jen.”

He places his hand on my shoulder and sighs heavily. “No one’s asking you to. Just hear her out. Angie and I will leave you to it, but we’ll be right over here. Just talk to her. You might be surprised.”

Scoffing loudly, I walk away from him and head toward the girls. My palms are sweating and I roll my eyes at my own stupidity, quickly placing them in my pockets where I can wipe the moisture off without looking like a moron.

“Angie, shouldn’t you be at work?” My focus is on blue eyes and not hazel, and it settles the nerves in my gut a little.

“I should, and I’m sorry I’m not, but making Penny squirm and apologise is so much more fulfilling.”

A scoff from the right of me and a muttered, “Fluffing witch,” almost makes my lips twitch, but I manage to catch it in time.

“Okay. I’ll allow that. It sounds like a once in a lifetime opportunity after all.” Another scoff to my right and a grin from Angie makes me shift on my feet to keep the laughter from escaping. “Do you have any plans to return to the office today?”

“Well, that kind of depends on how her apologies go from here on out. She may need a shoulder to cry on, or she may not. Who knows?” Her eyes burn into mine now, a warning visible in them, and with a subtle nod, the warning disappears. I heard her loud and clear: Don’t be an arsehole, and give her a chance.

“Excuse me, Benny boy, one of your players seems to need my assistance. And you know I’m all about helping out the team.” She stands up, her eyes greedily taking in Jenson’s form, and my lips turn down in distaste.

“Just be grateful he doesn’t have a boat.” Murmuring the words quietly to myself more than anything, I’m shocked when Angie cackles and winks at me. Obviously I’m not the only one who’s heard his fantasies. They’re made for each other.

A throat clears to the right of me and I realise I’m still standing up. Without letting my gaze fall to her, I take a tentative seat and focus on a spot behind her head.

“I ordered you a drink. Nearly gave Marty a heart attack when I ordered a Scotch. He thought it was for me.”

Nodding my head, my gaze drifts down to the glass still clutched in her delicate hand, and I inhale sharply as our fingers brush when I take the glass from her. “Thanks. You didn't need to.”

I know I told Angie I’d listen, but I’m finding it hard to do anything right now. Her scent is intoxicating, a familiar green apples and vanilla, and all I want to do is pull her into my lap and remind her she’s mine. But I can’t. She’s made it clear she doesn’t want me like that, so I have to respect her wishes after all.

“But I did. It's the first of many things I have to do. My next thing is to apologise. For putting you in an impossible position. I should never have made you sign an NDA. I shouldn’t have hidden what happened from the people who care about me. If I’d told them, you wouldn’t have had to go through all the stress of thinking you’d lose the Spartans.”

She takes a quick breath and I keep my focus locked on my glass and the amber liquid in it. I know I should correct her, let her know I was never in danger of losing my team, but I want to hear what she has to say first.

“You won’t, by the way, lose them, I made sure of it.” My eyes snap to hers and she smiles softly. “There he is. Hi.” She doesn’t let her gaze waver and she keeps her focus on me and only me.

“What do you mean?”

“I had evidence. Of the first and second time Brooks assaulted me. I’d taken pictures of the bruises on my arms and had the report from urgent care from before. I had recordings of the way he spoke to me every time he propositioned me. I’d logged complaints to Director Allen about Brooks each time and I noted them all down. I also had a bunch of witnesses from the Gala who would vouch for me. I told him if he went ahead and sued you, anything he got from you I’d take from him, and more. His wife’s already taking half of what he has, I just promised to take the rest.”

She takes a sip of her coke while I struggle to contain the anger and pride soaring through me. She did that for me.

“He said he was dropping the case, but if he doesn’t, I’ll make good on my promise. I won’t let you lose the Spartans. I won’t be the reason you lose anything. I’m not your mom.” She swallows and breaks her gaze and looks down to her glass. She’s fighting tears and I want to comfort her but I can’t, not yet.

“I’m already penniless.” My voice is low but she still hears it. She looks at me again and the pain and sadness in her hazel orbs almost breaks me.

“You did mean me. Jenson didn’t put two and two together because you never call me Penny, but I knew. Or at least, I hoped.”

She swallows back her emotions and squares her shoulders before speaking again. “I walked away from you because I was mad at you for embarrassing me and making me feel like I needed to be saved. I wasn’t thinking about how you felt. Seeing someone you…loved like that. Of course your first reaction would be to protect. I was in my own head, my insecurities louder than they’ve been in a while, and I couldn’t think clearly.” She shakes her head at herself, takes a deep breath, and locks her gaze with mine. “I’m sorry.”

The air whooshes out of me and I want nothing more than to reach over and soothe her. Tell her everything will be okay. But I can’t. She doesn’t want what I have to offer, and I can’t be anything to her if I can’t have it all.

“Apology accepted. Thank you for doing that with Brooks. But you should’ve done it for yourself, not for me.”

I attempt to stand, but she reaches over and grabs my hand. The touch sends a wave of heat through me and I stare at her hand on top of mine.

“Please don’t go. Not yet. I don’t want us to be like this.” Her voice is desperate, and I take a deep breath to try to keep my emotions at bay and lower back into my chair.

“I know what you want, Penelope, and I can’t give you that. I’m always going to want to protect you, look after you. And it’s not because I don’t think you’re capable of doing it yourself, it’s because I don’t want you to have to. You’ve kept everything inside, relied on yourself for so long now, that you don’t know how to let anyone else help you. And I can’t sit back and watch bad things happen to you whilst you scrabble to get yourself out of them. Not when I can help you. I can’t. I love you, Penelope, but I can’t.”

I slowly take my hand away and stand from the table, fighting the emotions from my throat as I turn away from her.

Her chair scrapes back and she runs around me and stands with her hands on her hips, her bottom lip between her teeth and her eyes darting around the bar. “I want that, Ben. I want you to look out for me, protect me, rescue me for god's sake. I want that. I’ll rescue you back when I can. But I know now it doesn’t make me a damsel, it just makes me human. Please don’t walk away from this, from us. I love you.”

Those three words shatter everything inside me and I grab her and pull her against my chest. Her arms wrap around my waist and she tilts her head up to look at me.

“It’s about damn time, Little One.”

She sighs against my chest and I rest my chin on top of her head. After a few minutes, I put a little distance between us, my arms still wrapped around her, and she tilts her head back to look at me.

“You’re sure about this? You really want all of this? All of me? The way I am?” She nods, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “Thank fuck. You’ve had a hold on me for so long now, I’m glad you’re finally ready to accept what we are.”

The last thing I see is the smile on her face as I lower my head and capture her lips in mine. When I finally break our kiss, I rest my forehead against hers. I have a confession to make. “Erm, this may not be the right time to tell you this, but I was never in danger of losing the team. My lawyers are a fortress of steel when it comes to that kind of thing.”

Her brows furrow in confusion. “But Jenson said Brooks was suing you… Did he just lie to get me to do this? A grand gesture! I’m gonna kill him.”

My chuckle breaks the conversation she was having with herself and forces her eyes back to mine. “He was suing me. That’s true. But like I said, I was never worried about it. Jenson caught me at a particularly low moment and I offloaded all that onto him, but I neglected to let him know it was handled. It was my fault. Don’t kill your brother.”

“Fine. But you have to tell him that or he’s going to tell the whole damn world he helped save the Spartans, and I can’t deal with another elaborate story where he’s the knight in shining armour.”

I place a gentle kiss on her nose and whisper, “Done,” as she sinks into my embrace again.

This is what I wanted. Us, together and against the world. And especially against Jenson. She’s not perfect, neither am I. And we’re definitely not perfect together. But I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to be. And now I know she will too. She’ll spend her life trying to tighten this hold she has on me. And I’m more than happy to be along for the ride.

Because I’m not letting her go. Ever. Not now I know she loves me. Not now I’ve finally got what I want—someone to save when I can and someone who’ll rescue me right back. Someone who not only has a hold on my heart, but a hold on me, our future and everything in between.