Page 51

51

PENNY

“You’ve got to eat, Pen. I don’t care what you say. I will not have you wasting away to nothing in front of my eyes. Now eat the fluffing sandwich.”

Angie holds a plate in front of me. I reach forward and take a small bite before putting it back on the plate. I have no appetite, and nausea swarms my stomach from the minute I wake up to the time I go to bed. But I know Angie won’t let this go.

“Nope. You need to finish it. Or I’ll phone Mama B.”

I narrow my eyes on her, pick up the sandwich, and nibble on it.

“Thank you. It’s been over a week, Pen. You haven’t left your house, you’re barely eating, and you spend most of your days watching The Princess Bride on repeat, pausing on Inigo, and then crying again. We want to help.”

I slam the sandwich down so hard the plate rattles, and lock eyes with her. Hearing her explain my sad little existence for the last week is fuelling the anger inside me.

“Oh, I’m so sorry if I’m upsetting you. I mean, it’s not like the whole town doesn’t know my personal business. And let’s not forget my dad is barely speaking to me because rather than letting him help me, I lied about my job, left myself vulnerable and in danger, and acted like it a fucking brat when he called me on it. I have no job. My so-called brothers are all treating me like I’m fragile and made of glass—well, except Jenson who is outright pissed at me. And, and the person I thought I could trust turned out to be a snitch. So excuse me if I don’t feel like smiling and just want to wallow in my heartbreak.”

I push the plate even further away, stand up, and run straight to my bedroom. I should never have let her in in the first place, but she’s the only one who’s bothered to check on me. The boys sent me some texts, upset I’d kept things from them, and when I went to see my dad the night after the gala, he was so disappointed, I had to leave.

“Why didn’t you tell us? You know I’m always here for you. We all are.”

His face is etched with disappointment and I have to look away when I spot tears welling in his eyes.

“I didn’t think I needed to. I had it handled.”

“And that's all that matters, isn’t it? Penny has everything handled, so god forbid her family, the people who love her, want to help. You never let us in. Any of us. We try to be there for you, but you shut us out time and time again. People love you, Penny. People want to be there for you. You need to start letting them.

“If you’d told us, we wouldn’t be here right now, would we? I wouldn’t be forced to watch my beautiful daughter become a shell of herself because she’s alienated everyone in her life and is now heartbroken. You had a good thing going with Ben. You loved the job. Maybe not as much as teaching, but you still loved it.”

I refuse to listen to most of it because it’s too painful, so I latch onto the part I can hear without it hurting. “That’s what this is all about isn’t it? Your beloved job. I only took it to help you in the first place. You don’t care about anything but your stupid Spartans and Ben.”

As soon as the words have left my lips I know I’m wrong. I’m acting like a petulant little child.

“If you believe that, Penelope, then I’ve failed you as a father. My whole life has always been about you. And it always will. It's why it hurts to watch you shut people out because of the hurt your mom caused you. When you’re ready to apologise and accept what you’ve done, I’ll be here. But until then, I’d like you to leave.”

Walking away from my dad’s place was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I know he’s right. I know I shut people out. I had a beautiful, caring, and attentive man declare his love for me, and instead of acknowledging that, accepting it and shouting from the rooftops that I loved him too, I paid it no mind and crushed it under my heel when I walked away from him.

And now I’ve pushed Angie away, the one person on my side. As the front door snicks shut, I know I’ve finally gotten what I wanted. I’m alone. And I let the tears fall from my eyes as I sob.