Page 71 of He Is My Bride

Li Ying put the ladle down and turned around, looking at Hanjun, who sat behind his laptop and was looking at him, worried.

“You’re right: I told you that I’m sure about this.

I knew it would take sacrifices, and I still made a promise to you.

Because I want to. I want to marry you. I have no right to be angry at you over something I willingly chose, so I’m sorry. ”

Hanjun couldn’t look Li Ying in the eyes. The shame was crushing him.

I’m imprisoning you.

“I’m just going through, uh, the process. Mourning the things that I have to let go of, still actively making those compromises I said I was ready to make. Just please, give me some time, okay?”

“My wife should not be mourning his life on his wedding day.” Hanjun’s voice was strained, barely more than a whisper .

“Oh, Hanjun.” Li Ying walked to his husband, wrapped his arms around him and pressed his head against his chest. “I’m gaining so much in return, aren’t I?

I get to spend the rest of my life with you, and we’re having a child.

Our child! I will be so happy, I just need time to process everything, okay? ” Li Ying kissed Hanjun’s forehead.

Once again Hanjun gave in to his selfishness, his weakness.

“Alright.”

“Hmm.” Li Ying smiled. “…Damn, the soup!” He darted back to the kitchen to stir before the borscht boiled over.

After lunch, Hanjun prepared to leave for his part of the dress rehearsal, and he and Li Ying would not see each other after that until tomorrow, when Hanjun would come to get him with his best man and groomsman for the wedding ceremony.

“See you tomorrow, love! Don’t you get cold feet and escape tonight, I would find you!” Li Ying joked as he gave Hanjun a kiss. Hanjun pulled him in, deepening the kiss, trying to say with that single gesture everything he wanted to say to Li Ying: I love you, and I’m sorry.

Hanjun would be staying at the hotel until the wedding, possibly doing some Wu-esque stag party ‘shenanigans’ in the evening: maybe Hanrong would buy him one drink, possibly Yiyi and A-Yu would prank him once, if things got out of hand.

So Li Ying had the apartment to himself, and Anne came over and would stay overnight, to wake up early with him to do everything from his makeup to his hair and help him get into the dress.

And of course she was there to partake in some more wedding traditions, combing Li Ying’s hair in the evening prior.

“Usually this is done by the bride’s mother, but even if—I’m sorry.” Anne quieted, fearing she had been about to say something insensitive.

“No, no, it’s alright. Even if what?”

“Even if Mrs. Qian knew of the wedding, I suppose she wouldn’t be the kind of mother-figure to do this with you?”

“Haha, definitely not! You’re the best woman for the job, and I’m so happy it’s you who’s here with me.”

“Heh, I guess sometimes I’ve had to act like a strict mother with you, so maybe it’s appropriate.”

They laughed.

They went on to have a mini hen party, mixing cocktails—Anne made sure Li Ying didn’t drink too much—and watched Mamma Mia and sang along to the songs together.

Li Ying went full out on Voulez-Vous, standing on the couch and singing to the remote while Anne cheered him on.

Li Ying might have been a sworn metalhead, but hey, who doesn’t love Abba?

Anne corralled him into bed in a timely manner, and in the morning of his wedding day, Li Ying emerged from the bed well-rested—and absolutely freaking out.

Anne saw that he ate something and showered, and then began their work: Li Ying’s hair was blow-dried and curled, and Anne worked it into an elegant high bun and wove real pink orchids into it. The wedding bouquet would have the same flowers in it.

A glamorous makeup was applied, with dark red lips, although Anne went lighter on the eyes to keep Li Ying still looking fresh. For jewelry, Li Ying wore a golden wedding bangle with a twin mandarin ducks motif, and on his ears, Anne put dangling gold earrings.

The result was a modern yet elegant bride with plenty enough nods to tradition to please even the Wus. Li Ying stood stunned before the mirror when Anne let him see the end results. It was gorgeous, breathtaking—and Li Ying didn’t recognize himself.

I’m a perfect bride. But is this really me? Is this who Hanjun wanted to marry?

No, this woman in the mirror was for the family, this was for the masses, this was for Shanghai. Shanghai didn’t want Li Ying, it wanted her .

But it doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that Hanjun and I will be happy together. They would be happy after this, wouldn’t they? Won’t we be so happy? Won’t we be happy…

“I need to sit down,” Li Ying heard himself say. Not this again. “I’m having a panic attack.” It had been a year since his last episode, but there it was.

“Li Ying?”

“Get me some ice.” He sounded perfectly calm, but he knew his mind was going into a lockdown.

Anne didn’t question, but fetched a tray of ice cubes and brought them to Li Ying.

He pressed an ice cube into his palm. It helped somewhat, and he kept focusing on the cold sensation and his breathing.

“Are you okay, Li Ying?” Anne sounded worried.

“Yeah, just give me a moment.”

“Should we… Can you really do this? Hanjun will be here in less than an hour, should we delay?”

“No. Just give me a damn minute.”

“Okay. I’ll be here.”

Li Ying felt more present now, although for him it could as well have been hours or no time at all.

“And the veil?” Li Ying asked.

“Yes, I’ll put it on now.”

Anne attached a red, gorgeously cascading sheer veil to Li Ying’s bun and made sure it stayed on firmly.

It was longer in the back, covering but not hiding his bare back where the dress had an opening, and flowing all the way down to touch the train of the dress.

Anne lowered the front part over Li Ying’s face: it was shorter, not covering the front of the dress but only thinly veiling Li Ying’s face, and he could perfectly see through it still.

The concierge called .

“They’re here,” Anne said. “Sit tight, we’ll come and get you soon.” Anne left Li Ying sitting with a glass of water and went to get the door.

Li Ying sat there, head buzzing and thoughts scattered, but as he sat in Hanjun’s bedroom in silence, just waiting for the door games to be over, he started herding those thoughts together like wayward rabbits.

It’s going to be alright.

Meanwhile, Anne opened the door for Hanjun, who had come alone.

The groom stood there in a traditional red Tang suit made from red silk and embroidered with golden dragons, a counterpart to Li Ying’s phoenix.

It was tailored to Hanjun and sat well on his form.

This was combined with black dress pants, and Hanjun’s black oxfords were polished to a perfect shine.

Anne smiled, happy on Li Ying’s behalf because she knew he would be delighted to see his handsome groom. But first:

“Hello, Sir Hanjun.”

“Hello, Lü Anne. I have come to get my bride.”

“First, I suppose I should put you to a test. Where are Wu Hanrong and Yiyi?” Anne looked left and right, but didn’t see the best man or the groomsman in the corridor.

Hanjun smiled. “I chose to come alone. I wanted to thank you for all her help in making this happen, and for being there for Li Ying through it all. You have been an invaluable friend.” Hanjun bowed to her from the waist, and Anne flustered:

“Please, Sir Hanjun, there is no need!”

But Hanjun stayed down for a moment more, and when he straightened himself, he said: “Yes, there is.”

“Well…” Anne brushed a nonexistent hair from her face. “I thank you as well, for giving me so many opportunities. Rest assured, there is no debt between us.” Anne returned the bow, and Hanjun received it gracefully .

Once Anne got up in turn, she said, “After everything you and Li Ying have been through, I would feel silly to make you play too many games before you can see your bride, so I will only ask one question from you, as Li Ying’s bridesmaid.

Li Ying deserves happiness and security in his life, someone who will cherish him and not leave him.

I understand he has been through a lot, and even if he’s sometimes been a rascal, he’s a good person, and I wish him only the best. So: Wu Hanjun, do you promise to make Li Ying as happy as he can be in this life? ”

Hanjun didn’t answer immediately. He truly seemed to weigh the meaning of his answer before giving it:

“I promise I will do everything to make Li Ying as happy as he can be.”

Anne nodded, then stepped aside to let Hanjun in. “Your bride awaits.”