Page 22 of Hat Trick (Titans Hockey #1)

Chapter nineteen

Gabe

I t's a rare Saturday night off, but we're all too tired to go out.

It happens every season. We start the new season with energy and excitement, ready to take on the world.

Then eventually the grueling schedule, the hours on the ice and in training, and we hit a point where we're physically and mentally exhausted.

By the end of the season we're wondering why in the world we still play, but during the off season we want nothing more than to get right back out there.

I chuckle to myself. It's an unhealthy relationship for sure.

Carter and Luca play Mario cart on the TV after Carter and Emily put Annie to bed.

I'm on the floor, rolling out my sore muscles.

Emily pads silently behind the couch, leaning over just enough to remove the empty beer bottles from the coffee table before heading to the kitchen and getting the boys new ones.

I like that about her. Being helpful is her default setting, she doesn't think twice about it.

She sees an empty, she replaces it. She sees dirty laundry, she takes care of it.

She's never looking to see what she can gain in any moment, simply giving. To a fault.

Luca and Carter don't even look up from their game before tossing ' thanks ' at her like an afterthought. I want to punch both of them and tell them to be more grateful, but then Emily's kneeling next to me on the floor.

"Can I help?"

"Help me...roll out my muscles? "

"Yeah, it's easier if you just lay down and let me." I give her a skeptical look but let her take the roller from me. "I used to do it for my brother all the time." Ah right, her hockey playing brother.

I give in with a shrug and lay on the floor on my stomach so I can watch Mario cart.

She takes the roller and starts massaging my calves. It hurts so good, but I am grateful that I can relax while she does it. She's not a physical therapist, but lactic acid is lactic acid, and sore muscles are sore muscles.

I take the rare moment 'alone' with her to get to know more about her.

We're not technically alone, but with the other two gaming and talking shit, we might as well be.

And I'm addicted to all things Emily. I've learned to trust her, and I know her heart, but I don't know her past, her goals, and selfishly, I want to know if she envisions a future where we can be together.

"Why kids?"

"Hm?"

"Why did you get into child care? Your degree?"

I feel more than see her shrug. "Children deserve to be cared for, to be loved." I twirl my finger in a 'continue' motion.

She sighs deep and long. "My mom left when Sammy and I were young. I couldn't understand it at the time. I didn't understand why the one person who was supposed to love me unconditionally didn't...couldn't." My heart aches painfully when I think of a younger, sad, scared Emily.

"Kids don't ask to be brought into this world.

And I know some kids are accidents, but every kid deserves to be loved, to be nurtured.

Look at Carter. He didn't even know Annie existed, but he's loved her since day one.

It really fucked me up. I spent years in therapy, trying to understand that her leaving wasn't because of something I did, or that I wasn't good enough.

" I can hear the sadness in her voice. She still doesn't think she's good enough.

Her mother leaving, her shithead of an ex.

She's only ever been shown her entire life that she isn't good enough.

Rage starts to build deep in my stomach until she speaks again.

"I was good...for awhile there...until I got drunk in college one night and found her on social media.

She's remarried, to a guy who already had kids.

Then I spiraled again, wondering what about his kids was so much better than me.

Why she could stay for them, but not us.

" Fuck, I hate this. Her voice is so small, so sad.

I can't fucking stand it. But Emily's strong. There's got to be more to the story.

"So you went back to therapy?"

"Yeah, it helped for a little while."

"What happened?"

She groans. "I started dating my ex. He really did a number on my self-esteem.

He'd shower me with pretty words but didn't want to be seen in public with me.

Didn't tell his friends about me. He was sweet behind closed doors, but never spent the night.

I really thought I loved him, but in hindsight he was just using me for sex. He was embarrassed of me."

The ember of rage that had started in my belly explodes. I ball and flex my fingers, anxious to find this punk and beat the ever-loving shit out of him. How could anyone be embarrassed of her? She's fucking gorgeous and the best woman I've ever met.

"How did you break up?" I need to hear that she got wise and kicked his ass to the curb. I need to know she was okay .

"I was walking to class and saw him hanging on his other girlfriend. A tall, pretty blonde."

FUCK!

I spin around so I'm laying on my back. The move gets the other guys' attention and they pause the game. She turns her face away, trying not to let them see her wipe a tear off of her cheek.

"What happened?" Carter asks, sliding to the edge of the couch, likely ready to pummel me if I hurt her.

"Nothing. I'm fine." Emily quips back, using her hand to signal me to turn back over.

"Fuck them. Emily. Seriously. Fuck all of them." My tone is harsher than I mean it to be, but she's hit that part of my soul that needs to defend people. I have a very small inner circle - in fact, only the people in this house are in it - but these people are my family, my home, mine to protect.

Now both boys look the right amount of concerned.

"What. Happened." The words are a question but the tone is not.

"People Ems entire life have been telling her she's not good enough and it's fucking bullshit."

"I'm fine, really. I dropped out of college so I wouldn't have to see him again and went no contact. I went back to therapy and got the job with the Titans. And now I have you guys." She looks at the three of us with a sad smile. "Really. I'm okay now."

I grip her shoulders, forcing her to look into my eyes. “You are perfect, Emily. Perfect in every way.”

She blinks, stunned by the intensity of my words. “Gabe, you don’t have to— ”

“I mean it,” I say fiercely. “You’re smart, kind, beautiful, and strong. You’ve been through so much, and you’re still standing. That makes you incredible. Anyone who can’t see that is a fool.”

A tear escapes down her cheek, and I gently wipe it away with my thumb.

Luca joins us on the floor, interlacing her fingers with his. “You are more than good enough, Emily. You’re amazing. And don’t you ever let anyone make you feel otherwise.”

She nods and swallows. I know she doesn't believe us yet, but a plan to speak praise and confidence into her every day until she sees that we do takes place. I just need to get the boys alone so we can tag team her.