Page 40 of Harbor Lights (Inishderry Island Romances #3)

TWENTY-EIGHT

Shiv held the board still while Joey secured it in place.

Her arms burned with the weight, but Joey was working as fast as they could.

Once the insulation was in place, they could get the power sockets connected, and switch on the heating and lighting.

But not today. The sun was about to go down behind the mountains.

She was gratified by how much progress they’d made since starting at first light. They’d made the most of the short, unseasonably mild last day of the year. Half of the island had turned up at some point during the day to offer whatever skills they had, or to bring sustenance.

Shiv had been particularly pleased to see Ciara, the reclusive artist who lived further along the north coast. She was currently sitting cross-legged on a rock outside, surrounded by several island kids, and a few from the mainland.

They were sharing ideas for a mural Ciara had volunteered to paint on the gable end of the building.

It would lift the appearance of the building to actually look like a creative place for young people.

Marianne was as driven on this practical project as she was in the kitchen and had led her team of volunteers to paint the outer walls a sparkling white. The kids had voted for the door and window frame colors, and Christy was bringing the gloss red paint when he returned with the ferry.

Con had turned up early with Joey. She and Con said an awkward hello, and then Con had supervised the grounds volunteers. They’d removed rubble and junk around the outside of the building and created a rudimentary border with some of the larger rocks, carefully painted with leftover white paint.

Inside the border, they’d created two small flower beds, and Aoife had demonstrated how to weave willow to create sides. Shiv had been a little envious she hadn’t had time to join in. Perhaps Aoife could give her a willow-weaving lesson one day in the future.

But what future? Would she still be here when spring came? The urge to run was strong. But she’d already had to leave her home once in the last few months. Why should Con’s rejection force her to abandon Inishderry?

“Are you gonna stand there all day?”

Joey’s voice jerked her back to the present and she realized Joey had moved on to the next panel. Jumping into action, Shiv held it in place.

Straightening, Joey spun a nail between their fingers. “Do you need to take some time to talk with Doc?”

“What? No, I’ll talk to her later. We’ve still a few jobs to get done.”

“Okay, but she’s asked me to run her back shortly. She’s got a plane to catch.”

Shiv blinked, trying to comprehend this piece of news. “Are you sure? She asked to come to the cabin later to talk.”

Joey shrugged and turned back to the job. “It’s not me you should be having this conversation with.”

They finished the task in silence, then Joey made a shooing motion, and Shiv went out into the dying light to find Con.

She was standing on a rock, looking out into the harbor at a glorious red sky. She turned slightly as Shiv approached and jumped down.

“Red sky at night… ”

“But I’ve heard you won’t be around later to witness any delighted shepherds.” Shiv didn’t hide the anger in her tone.

Con looked at the ground. “I’m sorry. My plans have changed a little since I asked to see you. Can we talk now?”

“Here?” Shiv waved at their surroundings. Was Con so unaffected by what had happened she thought a rushed chat in the middle of a field would make everything better?

Con indicated Joey’s nearby truck. “Sorry, it’s probably the best I can do.”

Shiv shrugged. At least, they would have a little privacy. She let herself in the passenger side and Con joined her in the driver’s seat.

“Less than ideal, I know.”

“All of this is less than ideal, Con.”

“I know and I’m truly sorry. But something’s come up and I really need to go. But I can’t… leave without explaining my behavior yesterday.”

“It’s fine. Water under the bridge.” She gulped. It was so far from fine. It hurt like fuck.

“I don’t want you to think this is about you. It’s not.”

“Ah, the old ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ tack. Makes perfect sense.”

Con twisted in the seat. “Siobhán, please.” She rested her hand on Shiv’s arm, but Shiv pulled it free and reached for the door release.

“I’m scared.”

Shiv paused at the handle and took a breath.

“I… like you. A lot. I can’t bear for you to think that I don’t think you’re good enough. You’re perfect. Way out of my league. But I’m terrified you’ll leave me, and I’ll be alone again.”

Shiv turned back to her. “So, you’d prefer to be alone, anyway? Just in case you get hurt.”

“No. I don’t want that.” Con’s eyes shone with unshed tears. Shiv didn’t want to see her cry. She didn’t want to hear why they couldn’t be together.

“It’s the same thing, Con. You don’t think I’m reliable enough to take a chance on. You’re not even prepared to have a proper conversation about it. You’d rather run now.” She swung the door open.

“No, that’s not it. Please.” The tears started to fall, and Shiv jumped down from the cab.

She turned. “What is it? This emergency that’s more important than talking to me?”

Con rubbed at her eyes and opened her mouth once or twice before she answered. “It’s not more important, it’s just…”

Shiv raised her eyebrow and waited for an answer.

“Majella needs me.”

She laughed, not hiding the bitterness.

“But it’s?—”

“Go back to your past, Con. It’s where you belong.”

She slammed the door and walked away, passing Joey without making eye contact.

“Right, folks,” Shiv announced, “let’s finish off the jobs we’re doing and start packing up. Anyone who wants to join me tomorrow, I’ll be here all day.”

“Apart from lunchtime, when you’ll be at the Waterside,” Kasia called from where she watched with Pegeen on her hip.

Shiv nodded her acknowledgment. She needed to eat. But every other minute of her time would be spent getting this club off the ground. If it was all she had, she’d make sure she gave it everything.

* * *

“How long have you been here?” Christy’s curly head dipped inside the door and distracted Shiv from attaching the last of the power sockets.

“I brought some flashlights and got started early.” She stood and stretched her stiff back.

Yellow light spilled in the windows. She followed Christy outside and watched dawn spread across from the far end of the island.

“Happy New Year. Looks like a good dry start to it.”

“Happy New Year to you, too.”

It didn’t feel that happy so far, but this would be the year Inishderry opened its youth club, and that meant something.

“Will you be here all day? I was going to ask you to come up to my house for a drink later. Joey and Marianne will be there. And Aoife’s leaving the kids with Seán. We can play silly card games.”

“Thank you for thinking of me, but my plan is to work myself half to death, and then collapse in bed by seven pm. I’m not feeling very sociable.”

“Ah, come on, it’ll be fun. Doc’s coming along, too.”

“I doubt that. She’s flying off to England today.”

Christy shook his head. “Her plans must’ve changed. She was on the first ferry.”

Shiv frowned. Christy wouldn’t have made a mistake; he knew Con too well. Why wouldn’t she have left as planned?

“Christy’s correct. I changed my plans.”

Con’s distinct, clipped tone made her head whip around. She stood at the gate in her long wool coat, the collar turned up against the wind.

“I’ll be getting home.” Christy backed away as though sensing something. “Don’t forget drinks later.”

Con waved him off.

Shiv didn’t know what to say. The last thing she’d said to Con had been in anger, and she’d meant to hurt her. She wasn’t proud of that. But she wasn’t ready to apologize. Yet, seeing Con here on the island lifted her heart. Would it always be like that? A little reminder of what they could’ve had.

“Do you want to take a stroll up to the cabin? I’d like a chance to talk.”

What was there to talk about? “What about your flight?”

“I canceled it. You were right, Shiv. I’ve been stuck in the past, but I don’t want to live there any longer.”

Shiv tried to think of an excuse not to have this conversation. “I said I’d be here all day, if anyone wanted to work.”

Con waved around the empty field. “Everyone’s at home, making the most of the last day of the holidays. Back to normal tomorrow.”

Shiv still didn’t know what normal was meant to look like.

“Okay, we can go to the cabin for a coffee. Then I’m getting on with the outside painting while the weather’s so mild.”

She closed up the shed and led the way past the entrance to the Waterside, then up the rocky track to her cabin.

“What about Majella? Doesn’t she need you?”

Con looked ahead as they walked. “She says she does. But that’s because I’m always there when she asks. Perhaps she needs to learn to sort her own life out.”

“Did you tell her that?”

Con glanced over. “I tried. She threw a tantrum, and said I was letting her down. But I didn’t come here to talk about Majella.” Con’s breathing was getting labored as she took the steep hill at Shiv’s pace.

Taking pity on her, Shiv slowed up, then reached out to take the large bag Con had slung over her shoulder.

Con stopped her and turned her palm up. “What happened?”

The grazes had scabbed over after a thorough cleaning. Trust Con to notice. And use it to take control of the conversation.

She pulled her hand away. “It doesn’t matter.” The bag was bulky, but not heavy. “What’s in here, anyway?”

Con didn’t answer for a moment. Then, she said, “My swimming things. You’ve been nagging me for so long, and Kasia said everyone was going in off the dock at high tide this afternoon.”

Shiv felt her eyebrows crawl upward. “It’s not really the time of year to take up cold water swimming.”

Con gave her an uncertain smile. “New year, new me?”

“If you insist. So, what did you come here to talk about?”