Page 28 of Free to Judge (Amaryllis Heritage #2)
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Is it odd how I can accept Declan under the justification of love, yet my father’s overbearing nature still requires forgiveness?
Perhaps it’s because I have no expectations of Declan?
Maybe it’s because Dad’s always been a hero in my eyes?
Maybe it’s because I’ve never been directly caught in the crossfire of one of his machinations?
Regardless of the why, I need to meet with him before I return to the office. He needs to understand where my disappointment and anger are coming from. I texted him directly.
Kalie:
I’d like to meet with you to talk.
Dad:
Name the place, baby.
Kalie:
Daniela Trattoria.
Dad:
I’ll make reservations.
I drive into the city and park in the Hudson Investigation parking lot at their Rockefeller Center office, then walk over to the restaurant on 8th Avenue.
Immediately after stepping inside, I am greeted with the clink of silverware and the low hum of conversation that filled the tiny Italian bistro.
Without bothering to stop at the hostess station, I head toward the back stairs.
Intuitively, I know where my father reserved a table for us.
Every memorable event we’ve shared as a family has been experienced here.
Dating back to my uncle’s engagement, my mother’s law school graduation, my parent’s mutual proposal and subsequent marriage.
Now, we come to the restaurant much more frequently as our family expands.
When my honorary uncle, country musician Brendan Blake, had his last concert at Madison Square Garden, we rented out the entire restaurant.
When our close family friend Kee Long hit number one on The New York Times best-seller list, we celebrated here.
Engagements, birthdays—I can’t remember not doing so here.
But this is the first time I recall coming here full of uncertainty.
It makes me hesitant to climb the last bend in the stairs to face my father. But when I reach the top, I realize I should have known better. The tables have been pushed aside, and there’s a table for two—just like the way he had it set up when he told me Mama was pregnant with my twin sisters.
He stands the moment he sees me. With the smile he reserves just for family, he leans down to kiss my cheek. “You look tired. Still recovering?”
I pull back and let him seat me before I reply. “I wasn’t sick.”
“That’s what you told your mother.”
“It was better than me telling her the truth at that point.” I flick my napkin open before laying it in my lap. When the waiter appears, I request, “Just a club soda today. I’m driving.”
He doesn’t ask why I stayed away. Instead, he lifts his coffee to his lips and takes a drink. “You’re angry with me.”
“Of course I am.” I pause once my drink is delivered.
I hold my tongue while we’re asked what we want for our meal.
After placing my order, my father orders for himself and we’re again given the solitude for our conversation.
“Dad, you’ve been hiding things. Important things.
Not just from me, but Mama. The whole family. ”
He levels his gaze on me. “I have.”
“Why?”
“That’s a much more difficult question to answer, Kalie.
” He sighs but doesn’t try to get out of it.
“There are things I need to do, protect you from, not just in the line of work we do but because of our family’s past. Things that could bring about unnecessary harm.
I’ve always done things with everyone’s best interest at heart, sweetheart. ”
“Have you?” I retort. “Because I don’t see how keeping the fact you have Declan working for you is protecting us.”
His eyes soften on me but don’t lose their edge. “If I had my way, you’d never have found out, Kalie.”
“This is exactly what I mean, Dad!”
“But then again, you’d never have confronted him the way you did either. Jon says it’s made a difference in him. He’s healing.”
“If that’s because of me, it’s because I’m asking,” I retort.
He nods thoughtfully before admonishing me. “Still, if he was as bad as we built his reputation to be, you could have been hurt, died…or worse.”
“W-what?”
“Kalie,” he lets out a broken sigh. “I need to tell you the full story about your grandfather.”
So he does. He tells me about how his father and Uncle Caleb’s mother had a torrid affair. How his father broke it off, and when they did, placed my Aunt Cassidy’s life—my father’s sister—in jeopardy. “I never stopped looking for the people who took her.”
“Excuse me?”
“In what world would you contemplate I would have?” His words are mild, but his eyes are turbulent. His hand clenches on the table. He’s coiled tighter than I’ve ever seen him—even when I went out on my first date. “It wasn’t until I hired Declan that I found the piece I couldn’t locate.”
Declan’s words from the other night spring to mind. “Jack Marshall.”
He nods. “My father. The man who started it all. The person who is in bed with the Byrnes. I have…so many questions.”
“I imagine you do.”
“But more than answers, I need to know you all are safe.” Before the shriek that wants to leave my lips can bring a member of the waitstaff scurrying toward us, he leans over and covers my mouth.
His voice lowers to a whisper, “Kalie, we found out the Byrnes are part of the pipeline that traffics women and children.”
Ripping his hand away, I hiss, “Tell me you’re going after them.”
He nods. “But carefully.”
“I’d have thought you’d have shot first and cleaned up later.”
A faint smile crosses his lips. “Maybe. If it weren’t for one thing.”
“What’s that?”
He tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. “You knocking Dec on his ass.”
Crap. “I wasn’t exactly thinking.”
His voice is quiet but firm. “I understand, Kalie. It’s just made things…difficult. There have been…threats…made.”
“Against who, Dad?”
His gaze skitters away from mine. Even if that’s telling enough, I need the words. “Dad?”
“I swore from the moment I held you for the first time I’d protect you with my life, Katherine Laura. I’ll never ever let up on that vow.”
“Daddy?” Tears clog my throat as I push him to answer my question.
He cups my cheek before he leans over the table to kiss it. “Don’t worry about the threat, sweetheart. I’ll always protect you.”
With that, I push away from the table. My father sits back as I hurry around the table. When he realizes what I’m about to do, he slides his chair back to make room for me on his lap.
While he’s hugging me close, he lets his love and protection wash over me.
The same way he did my whole childhood.
After spending most of our meal catching him up on the unusual friendship I have established with Declan, I take a bite of my food before laying something else on his shoulders. “I’m not gonna lie to Mama, the aunts, the uncles.”
He leans forward, fury leaping into his eyes. It almost causes me to recoil. Almost. “You don’t get to decide that—”
“You don’t either. We’re smarter than you give us credit for, Dad.
You think you’re keeping us safe, but what you’re doing by lying to us every single day is not giving us the tools to protect ourselves.
What would Jack Marshall walking into Amaryllis Events do to Aunt Cass?
To Mama knowing you knew?” I meet his fury head on before his brain catches up to his emotions.
He opens his mouth and snaps it shut. “She’d castrate me.”
“She would,” I agree. “If it’s about one of her children or her family, she demands to know everything you’re doing behind closed doors. It would be an all-out war in our family. Do you want to be responsible for it?”
“You don’t know the kind of emotional turmoil you’re about to stir up,” he warns me.
“No, I don’t. But if I’ve learned one thing, it’s that we’re stronger together.” Lifting my chin, I challenge him. “Isn’t that what you all raised us to believe?”
“Fair response, counselor. We are.”
My father looks away, out the window at the street traffic beyond. For a moment, he looks older than I’ve ever seen him. Maybe it’s because the weight he’s been carrying finally has a name and it’s the same as ours.
“Do you think your mother will forgive me?” he asks, almost too softly to hear.
I swallow the lump in my throat. “That depends. Are you going to tell her the truth? Or wait for it to come out in trickles?”
He accepts the challenge in my voice. Despite the worry in his eyes, the resolution in them makes me sigh inside. “I’ll tell her the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.”
“Tonight.”
“Determined little thing, aren’t you? Tonight.” He releases a heavy sigh. “This was much easier when you were nine.”
“When all you had to do to appease me was wear a tutu?” My lips quirk fondly, thinking of the laughter Declan enjoyed at his expense.
“Yes,” he grumbles. He takes my hand, gripping it in between his own. “I just want to say something, Kalie.”
“What’s that?”
“I’m proud of the woman you’ve become—someone who would stand up for her family regardless of the circumstance.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
For the rest of the meal, I let him know my opinions about Declan with him without breaking our attorney-client privilege. “Dad, he needs some sense of normalcy. No one can be undercover as long as he has without it.”
His face is thoughtful before he nods. “Let me think about it.”
Point made, I return to my food and embrace having my father back in my life where he belongs.