Page 26

Story: Fast Break

jt

I ’m feeling a lot less bolshy as I lie in bed later that night after my showdown with my parents. Just me, lying here all by myself, my world imploded. All I want is Quinn, but I know that is a futile wish right now.

I can still hear them talking in harsh whispered tones in the living room, only the occasional snippet audible to my ears. None of it complimentary. I’m guessing there is a lot of blaming and questioning going on out there about where they failed in their parenting of me.

I wish I could make them understand that this has nothing to do with them. That I didn’t suddenly decide to act on what my deepest instincts were driving me towards just out of spite to them. No, I just happened to fall in love with a boy who attracted me in ways I was no longer prepared to ignore. That I shouldn’t have ever had to ignore.

I don’t know how but I eventually must fall asleep because next thing I’m aware of is the soft morning light shining through the gap in my curtains. My stomach clenches with memories of last night, the horrible ending to what had been the best weekend of my life—winning the basketball championship, sex with Quinn.

Saying I love you and hearing the same words echoed back.

I peek out of my bedroom door, ensuring the coast is clear before I hotfoot it to the bathroom for a shower. I have no intention of seeing my parents this morning if I can help it, even if it means skipping breakfast.

I’m back in my bedroom tying my school tie around my collar when I hear a soft tap at my door. I instantly freeze, panic washing over me that it might be my parents on the other side.

“Can we come in?”

Yep, that’s Mum’s voice. I have to clear my throat before I’m able to form words. Are they here to tell me it’s time for me to pack? That I need to take up my uncle’s offer of a room? Despite everything, I’m honestly not sure if I’m ready to hear those words.

I find myself leaning back against my desk as my parents push their way through to my room and close the door behind them, the loud click sealing us in.

I’ve never had them both in this bedroom at the one time before and it seems comically small with three adults standing here, none of us quite knowing where to look. But the anger of last night has simmered down and instead seems to have been replaced by some kind of tension laden defeat which I’m not entirely sure is better. Neither of them looks like they slept much last night—which makes three of us.

I wait for them to speak, not feeling the need to make this easier on them. Dad clears his throat first.

“There were a few things said last night that we would like to discuss with you, Jethro Thomas,” Dad finally breaks the impasse.

“Trey will be here in a few minutes to pick me up for school,” I remind them, glancing at the time on my phone.

“Perhaps you could let him know not to come by this morning,” Dad continues. It appears my parents have agreed he will be the spokesman this morning. I’m not sure if that’s better for me than the alternative.

I reluctantly pick up my phone and shoot a quick text to Trey to tell him I’ll make my own way to school this morning and then turn to look at my parents. They’re watching me like they no longer know who I am, and I guess that is fair. I’ve never felt safe to be myself in this house so how could they ever really know me?

“Firstly, you talked about our family’s priorities and how they never seem to encompass you,” Dad begins. I shift on my desk. He almost sounds like he’s going to be reasonable about this. “And I believe you made some valid points there.” He swallows.

I realise this is not exactly easy for him, acknowledging any sort of fault. He continues. “You know we have struggled with your decision to not attend with us at church any longer. And I acknowledge — we acknowledge — that this has created some tension between us that has shown up in our conflicting priorities. And whilst it still breaks your mother’s and my hearts that you have made this decision for yourself, we talked at length last night about the fact you are eighteen now and have the right to make these decisions for yourself.”

I’m literally floored as I stand there, not sure I would ever live to see the day my parents acknowledge that I am of age and capable of independent decision making.

“Thank you,” I manage.

Dad nods his head in acknowledgement. “We apologise for missing your basketball games this season. We would like to do better in future.”

More stunned silence. I don’t know what to say. I’m feeling both triumphant and waiting for the other shoe to drop because I know this conversation is nowhere near over yet. The elephant in the room is starting to trumpet loudly while we skirt around the easier issues.

“I appreciate that,” I finally say.

“Good,” Dad says. He shares a glance with Mum who moves to sit on my bed while my eyes ping between the two of them, anxiety gripping my stomach. “Now, the other thing,” Dad broaches, his discomfort obvious.

“The other thing being Quinn?” I add, deciding I need to just confront this head on.

“Yes. Quinn.” Dad clears his throat again before looking up at me, resolution clear on his face. “Let me just say firstly that we’ve had barely hours to think this through. You hit us with a very big shock last night, something neither of us saw coming. But I spoke with my brother on the phone last night at length and he has … helped us to see things in a different light.”

I look between them again, nothing on their faces giving a hint of where this is going. Mum’s still twisting her hands in her lap while Dad is steeling his resolve for whatever he’s about to say next.

“You said last night that you would accept our tolerance on this matter,” Dad finally says, looking up at me with resolute eyes. “It’s a big ask of us, knowing our values on this type of thing. We might need time and a lot of patience. But we do want to get there eventually, Jethro Thomas. I don’t know yet what form that will take. At present, we just want you to know that we don’t want to lose you. We can offer you tolerance for your … companionship with this boy if you can offer us time and understanding and patience in return. Along with an agreement that in our house at least, our values remain paramount.”

I suck in a breath, unsure if I’m actually hearing these words correctly or if I’m living in a twilight zone. This may seem like a very minimal offer from my parents but if you actually knew them, you’d know how very big this gesture is.

“I can accept that,” I say, trying not to sound overly eager. Their offer does, of course, need to be tempered with the comparison of how Quinn’s mum deals with our ‘ companionship’ in her family home. And with the way my extended family have all loved and supported me so readily and easily. I also hear the underlying message that Quinn will never be welcome in this home and that breaks my heart even though it’s nothing I wasn’t expecting.

“Good,” Dad says again, sharing another glance with Mum. She has tears in her eyes and I’m not sure what they mean but she suddenly stands and steps towards me, pulling me into a hug.

“We’re sorry, Jethro Thomas,” she whispers. I’m not exactly sure what she’s sorry for but I’ll take it anyway. “I don’t know when you grew up, but I can see that you have and we both need to accept that. You know we love you.”

“Thank you,” I whisper back, not trusting my voice. She steps away from me, wiping at the tears on her cheeks. “I appreciate how hard this conversation has been for you both. But I’m really hoping we can get past this. I’m hoping you can finally see that I need my own space, that I can’t live with your heavy-handed control and invasion of my privacy anymore.”

“We understand,” Mum speaks up.

“Then maybe we can start with you taking off all the monitoring and tracking devices from my phone and laptop.”

“Okay. I think that’s fair,” Mum agrees without consulting Dad.

“And you should know that Grandma has given me money to take my driver’s test which I’ll be doing as soon as I can,” I add.

Mum lets out a deep breath. “This is all happening very fast.”

“I know. But as you said, I’m eighteen now and I need you to let me be a normal teenager.”

Mum and Dad both nod at me while he reaches out to take Mum’s hand.

“In the meantime, your mother will drive you to school,” Dad adds in a tone that concludes our awkward but necessary conversation.

I’m going to be late, and I know Quinn will be worried, but I think I just need to process my thoughts before I’m in a position to tell him anything. So I ask Mum to drop me off at the coffee shop near the school. I’m already half an hour late and a few more minutes won’t matter. I just need a few moments to think before I make my way into school, my entire world suddenly a different place than it was the last time I set foot on the grounds.

Who knew my entire world would be thrown upside down in the space of a single weekend? Just me, grappling with my new reality.