Page 5 of Double Dirty

“I didn’t say she was hot.”

“You never said she wasn’t,” he said, “So apart from the frightened bunny eyes, what else does she look like?”

“She’s got dark hair—it was in a ponytail, but after I gave my speech about ponytails, she took it down. She’s small, but curvy. Hates keto, loves carbs. She ordered extra fries,” I said with a smile.

“Sounds like my kind of woman there,” Leo said.

I gave him some side-eye and drained my beer, “Whatever,” I said. I wasn’t jealous exactly. I just didn’t want Leo and his hound dog ways messing around with Lexi who already had a hard time considering the threat some client had made against her.

“What’s her name?”

“Lexi,” I said.

“Like Alexandra?”

“I dunno. She said it was Lexi.”

“Sounds like she dots her i’s with little hearts,” he said. I shrugged.

“I got an early session tomorrow. I better turn in.”

“I think you don’t want to answer any more questions about Lexi. You’re acting so weird about it that she obviously got to you. You like her. Scared bunny rabbit Lexi who dots her i’s with hearts got to you,” he laughed.

“Fine, enjoy yourself. It’s total fiction,” I said crossly.

“You’re attracted to her. Just admit it.”

“I am, okay? We just met. I don’t really know her. We just got along great, and I like her. And she’s attractive.”

“There. That’s all I wanted to hear. Honesty is the best policy, Rafie,” he said with a chuckle.

“Go ahead and laugh till you piss yourself for all I care. I have to be at the gym at six. Good night,” I said, and went to bed.

3

Lexi

Ihad never had that much fun on a date. I mean, it wasn’t really a date. He was just my self-defense instructor who was a total gentleman and wanted to make sure I was okay. It’s not like that short-circuited all my knight in shining armor fantasies or anything. I totally didn’t think about kissing his neck, or what it would feel like to feel his stubble against my thighs. A low pull in my belly answered that thought, and I scolded myself.

It had been so easy to talk to him. He was kind and funny, and before I knew it, I’d told him more details than I meant to about what was bothering me. But instead of telling me I was stupid to go out there to begin with, Rafe gave me all these tips about how to deal with people who were acting threatening.

He said that a lot of self-defense was verbal and also body language, that I should look off to the guy’s shoulder and not right in his face and don’t cross my arms. Crossing my arms was a big coping mechanism for me—a comfort thing, so I’d have to work on that.

“If someone grabs your arm, kick him in the knee. Flatwith the sole of your foot, hard as you can. It’s gonna drop him. He’ll let go and you can run. That’s the idea. Get away. Don’t stay to stomp on him and kick him,” he told me. I had laughed.

“Who would stay and stomp somebody?”

“A criminal. Which is why you want to get away from one. Next thing is, if you’re right up against him, smash your fist right below his jaw. Vagus nerve. Hurts like hell.”

“Good. Kick him in the knees, punch him in the head, got it,” I said.

“No, that’s a last resort. Priority one is always to have an escape plan. Find the exits. Keep your distance. Don’t be reckless, don’t plan to punch your way out. Plan to cut and run,” Rafe said.

I nodded, feeling better and better about going out for coffee with him. Not just because the way he looked at me made my whole body light up with tingles. Maybe I was tired and lonely. Maybe I was still freaked out by my encounter with Mr. Watts and wanted a big strong man to hold me. But I wanted him to. Once I’d thought he was reaching for my hand, but he just went for another fry. I was deflated when that happened.

It was for the best though, because I would’ve ruined what had the potential to be a good friendship by having my first-ever one-night stand. I wasn’t the kind of person who hooked up with guys, but I was feeling vulnerable and didn’t want to be alone. If he’d given me the slightest idea that he was interested, there’s no telling what I would’ve done. I definitely would’ve let him kiss me. I probably would’ve let him come home with me, even though I’d never had a guy over to my apartment, not in the two years I’d lived there.

I was independent and focused on my work. I wanted tohelp children, to help families the way no one had helped mine. It was my calling. But for the first time ever, that felt really lonesome. Sitting across from Rafe in the diner had made it seem worse, not better. I felt a stab of longing for him, for anyone really, for a man to love and to wake up with every day. It made me ache somewhere in my chest.