Page 59 of Conquered (Highgate Preparatory Academ:y Compendium)

Screaming like a fucking banshee, I rake my nails down both sides of his face, taking him by surprise as he rears back.

Using his momentary distraction to my advantage, I bring my knee up hard, catching him in the balls, and causing him to roar in pain and roll off me.

Getting to my feet unsteadily, my head and face pounding, and my vision wavering, I take off at a run, glad my heels have fallen off at some point.

I leave my bag and all my things behind, not caring what happens in my desperation to escape.

Panicking as I hear him try to follow, relief floods me as I realise that he must get tangled in his trousers, because seconds later a crash and grunt sound behind me and I thank all that is holy for the sensitivity of men’s nuts.

The library is completely empty, as are the hallways, and as I race down them, I start to shiver at all of the what ifs that fill my head. I don’t stop running until I reach our door, pounding on the wood and screaming incoherently.

“Let me in! Please, let me in!” I'm sobbing, tears and snot dripping down my face as I continue my assault on the door.

It suddenly flies open, and I look into Kai's wide eyes, which flash with confusion as he takes me in.

“Lilly…” he says, brows pinched, but that's all I see as I push past him with a whimper, knocking him aside.

My frantic eyes alight on Jax, who is standing near the kitchen, his hand poised as if reaching for something on the countertop.

I don't think, I just rush towards him, throwing myself in his arms, wrapping my own around his strong neck in a vicelike hold.

He's my safe harbour, my protector, and my panicked mind somehow knows this.

He catches me in his massive arms, wrapping them around me tightly as I cry convulsively into him, almost hyperventilating, the neck of his black t-shirt screwed up in my hands as I grip him tight.

“Baby Girl?” he asks, his voice broken and rough with concern.

I can't speak. My head is buried in his chest, trying to breathe in his familiar lemon scent and take comfort from his embrace. But all I can do is relive clammy hands, pain, and the violation that just happened.

“She's bleeding,” I hear Kai say in a worried tone as I feel the others start to close in, making my breath speed up further and I shrink more into Jax. I feel a soft touch on my shoulder, and I jump so hard even Jax almost stumbles.

“Give her some fucking space,” he growls as I sink deeper into his arms.

“Princess,” Ash’s deep voice says from near me, but not too close. There’s a catch to it, like he’s terrified of what has happened to me. “Kai says you're bleeding. We need to see how badly you're hurt.”

I whimper as I feel the blows to my head and face again, experiencing the moment afresh.

“Please, Pretty Girl. Please, let me see,” Loki's voice sounds so distraught from near my face, and he hasn't called me that for so long that it breaks me out of my turmoil, and I look up at him.

His eyes go wide and then become hard, full of a rage that I see him try to get under control. It should scare me, but all I can feel is the claws of my own panic receding a little now that I’m here. With them.

“Oh, Darling,” he gasps brokenly, his hand coming out to touch me then stopping short. “Please, can I touch you?” he asks, his eyes shattered and desperate.

“Loki?” I whisper, blinking, feeling as though I've come out of a nightmare. Only, a part of me knows that this is no land of make-believe.

“I'm here, Pretty Girl. We're all here, and you're safe,” he tells me, stepping towards us, his hand brushing my cheek and making me hiss a gasp at the sharp pain his touch elicits.

“Safe?” I question, lifting my head further to look around me at the other guys.

As I meet Kai's eyes, I can see the glisten of tears, and he's visibly shaking. I catch Ash’s gaze, and there is terror, pain, and a blinding rage in the grey depths. He's practically vibrating with it.

I finally turn to meet Jax's piercing blue eyes. The banked rage in his is intense and should be terrifying, yet Loki is right. I'm safe here.

“Baby Girl…” Jax rasps, his voice rough and filled with the need for violence. His whole body is trembling, his muscles tense as he holds me. “What happened?” he asks me gruffly.

One minute, I'm standing wrapped in Jax's arms, and the next, it's hard hands grasping and pulling and hurting me.

“I'm going to be sick,” I manage to blurt out, tearing out of his arms and rushing for the toilet.

I make it just in time and heave my guts out until my stomach is empty, my head pounding even more. I sit back, away from the toilet. My head thumps and my eyes are closed, so I smell vanilla before I feel the warmth of a body in front of me.

“I need to take care of you, Pretty Girl. Can I do that, please?” Loki's deep voice begs, cracking at the end.

I nod, not ready to open my eyes yet. I feel the soft press of a cool cloth against my forehead, and I moan whilst leaning into it.

A glass is pressed into my hand. I open my eyes to see that Loki is crouched down beside me, his face creased.

I drink all the water in the glass, then hand it back to him.

He passes it up to Kai, who gives me an anguished smile, then heads out of the doorway.

Loki scoops me up in his arms, and I wince at the pain that fills my body.

He looks down and gives me an apologetic look, then walks us out of the bathroom, sitting down on one of the sofas with me nestled in his lap.

His arms come around me as he pulls me in for a tight hug, being mindful of my injured head.

As I’m pressed against his chest, I can feel how hard his heart is beating.

Ash is pacing in front of the lit fire, but he stops and looks at me, coming over to sit next to us.

“Can you tell us what happened, Princess?” he asks gently, reaching out a hand to hover over my lip. It feels like it's split, and my jaw throbs with pain. His eyes dart to my ripped dress, his hand clenching into a fist then lowering to his lap.

Jax walks over, crouching in front of me with a bowl of water, some dressings, and other first aid bits on a tray. He also takes in the state of my clothing, and a low angry rumble sounds from his throat.

I stiffen in Loki's lap, instinctually not wanting him to touch the sore parts of me, then relax a little as Loki’s hand comes up, rubbing soothing circles on my back.

“I'll try,” I whisper, my voice croaky. My hands worry at my dress skirts until Ash's hand reaches out to still them, taking one in his own grasp. I notice there's blood under my nails, and I swallow hard.

“I–I was at the library studying when I realised how late it had gotten,” I begin, my voice small and almost unrecognisable. “I saw someone come out of the shadows, and I thought that it was one of you.” I feel Loki tense underneath me.

“Who was it, Baby Girl?” Jax asks, his voice deep and full of the darkness in the dead of night. He reaches out with a warm wet cloth, wiping at my temple, and I cringe at the sharp sting.

I look him in the eye, and I see the moment it dawns on him. His whole body stills, like a snake ready to strike.

“That cunt Robert?” he asks in a growl. I nod.

“He's a fucking dead man walking,” Loki bites out, his whole body rigid.

“What happened next?” Kai asks softly, and I turn my head to see him on my other side, his hand coming to rub my back too.

I swallow again and close my eyes.

“H–he came at me. Started saying about how now that I wasn't with Loki and Jax, it was his turn. I–I tried to run.”

My breath hitches and I feel hot tears begin to trickle down my cheeks. A hand holding a soft piece of fabric wipes at them, and I look up to see Ash with a white handkerchief.

“B–but he grabbed my hair and pulled me down. I hit my head, I think, and then he was pinning me beneath him.” I swallow again, feeling like I'm experiencing it all over again, my heart rate picking up and my breathing becoming shallow.

“I tried to scream, but he put his hand on my mouth, so I bit it, hard.” I'm looking into Ash's eyes, and I see the barest hint of a smile at that, like he's proud of me for fighting dirty.

“Good girl,” he praises gently when I pause. “And then?” His fingers start rubbing over the knuckles of the hand he’s still holding.

“He punched me, here,” I say, hearing growls behind me as I lift my other hand to my throbbing jaw.

I hiss as Jax presses an ice pack gently to the area. The cold feels so good on my heated skin, a breath of relief leaves me. I start to smile at him in thanks, then wince at the movement. His blue eyes flare with anger, which he's somehow still managing to hold in check.

I look away from Jax. I can't bear to meet any of their eyes as I recall the next part.

“I must have blacked out for a few moments because when I came to, he...he was on top of me, his pants down, my knickers gone, and...and…” I stutter, unable to continue. My hand has Ash’s in a death grip, his own gripping back just as hard.

Loki's arms are so tight around me it hurts, but I don't tell him to loosen his grip. I need to feel him anchoring me, or I'll slip away.

“Did he…” Ash takes in a breath but holds my gaze. “Did he rape you, Lilly?” I've never heard him stutter before, or his breath hitch like that.

I shake my head, fresh tears running down my face.

“No…” I whisper. “But he was almost there,” I admit, hanging my head as I feel an itchy uncomfortable shame flush through me.

“Hey,” I hear Kai say as he gently lifts my chin. He's come around to my side, next to Jax, and is staring deep into my eyes. “You have nothing to be ashamed of, Lilly. None of this was your fault.”

“I–I know. It's just… if I hadn't run away from you guys that night…” I sob, unable to continue. But I see the shame flash brightly in his eyes.

“This. Is. Not. Your. Fault,” Jax says between gritted teeth, the first aid stuff abandoned by his feet as I look at him. “We should have taken better care of you.” His voice is filled with anger and self-loathing.

I glance at the others, and they all have the same guilt-ridden look on their faces. They truly believe my...attack is their fault.

“No,” I say firmly, anger flooding my veins and helping to straighten my spine a little. “This is not your fault either. None of you.” I look them each in the eye, one by one. “It's…” I swallow. “It's h–his fault.”

I can see the rage transform the guys as it sweeps over each of them. And I realise that they may be monsters, but they are beautiful monsters. And they're mine. They will burn down the entire world and everyone in it for me.

“What happens if I report this to the police?” I ask, turning back to Ash. I may be new to this world, but I'm not stupid. These kids, their families, have immense power, and I know that things like this can easily be made to disappear.

“His father is the Governor of Colorado,” Ash tells me, still gripping my hand like I'm his lifeline instead of the other way around. “I doubt the police would even show up.”

I take a deep breath, closing my eyes, hating that the world is like this. That people can do what they please with no consequences. Although, perhaps, that can work in my favour.

My eyes snap open, and I stare into Ash’s swirling steel grey ones.

“Then I want you to make him bleed. Make him hurt so bad that he will never be able to do this to anyone else.” My voice is hard and as sharp as glass.

Perhaps, in order to beat the true monsters of this world, you need to first join them?

A smile so wicked that even the devil himself would cower lifts Ash’s beautiful lips.

“Your wish is our pleasure, Princess.”

Then he lifts my hand, and just like in class earlier today, places a gentle kiss on my knuckles.