Page 27 of Chasing Shelter (Sparrow Falls #5)

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“I can breathe.” Ellie’s voice echoed in my head all day long. When I picked Keely up from riding lessons with Arden. As I watched her play at the park. And it didn’t stop as she and I headed to the Colson Ranch for our family dinner.

Something about the admission felt intimate. Like some connection had been forged by me giving Ellie a place that allowed her to breathe. And I’d be a liar if I said it didn’t freak me out.

I found myself a little more powerless to resist Ellie with every day that passed and every second I spent in her presence. And worse, I found I didn’t want to.

“Daddy?” Keely asked from the back seat.

I jerked myself out of my spiraling thoughts. “Yeah, Keels?”

“Can we teach Ellie blueberry chocolate chip pancakes next?”

My gut twisted. Keely was getting just as attached as I was. “Sure, we can.”

“Maybe we can make them into unicorns.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “I think you might be overestimating my pancake-art abilities. ”

Keely beamed at me through the rearview mirror. “You can do anything , Daddy.”

God, that confidence slayed me. Suddenly, I heard Ellie’s voice in my head again. “You’re a good dad.”

I cleared my throat, trying to brush off the emotion. “Just remember you said that when the unicorn looks more like a sad horse.”

Keely giggled. “At least it’ll still taste good.”

I pulled into a spot at the end of a makeshift row next to a bunch of my family’s vehicles: Fallon’s hatchback that had seen better days.

Kye’s black truck with its shadow detailing in art that looked like the patterns he inked on people’s skin.

Anson’s equally dark truck with far more dust and dirt on it.

Linc’s Range Rover. Shep’s truck with the Colson Construction emblem on the side.

And an SUV I’d memorized the sight of by now.

I looked for hints of it all over town. Just like I looked for flashes of the girl with hair that sparkled like a rainbow in the sunlight. My fingers tightened around the wheel.

Everything in me battled, knowing that Ellie was inside. But anticipation won out. Because I was like an addict hunting for his next fix, knowing it was just around the corner.

I switched off the engine, and Keely was already unfastening her booster seat. “Do you think I can go riding after dinner?”

I laughed as I got out of the SUV and moved around to help her down. “You went this morning.”

Keely beamed up at me. “Two’s better than one.”

She jumped, and I caught her easily and set her down. “Let’s see how long dinner lasts.”

“Daaaaad, it’s always forever.”

She wasn’t wrong there. Colson family dinners always started early because they went long. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. It was everything I’d never had as a kid and everything I wanted to give to Keely. I might have failed to give her a two-parent home, but at least she had this.

As if she wanted to remind me of that, Keely took off running for the porch steps of the home I’d lived in from twelve until I left for college.

It looked like something out of one of those feel-good movies: a white farmhouse with a wraparound porch, complete with rockers and porch swings.

I knew it was worn from years of use, but Nora and Lolli never let so much as a chip show through on the paint or anything else.

Keely hauled open the front door just as I reached the top step. The moment she did, voices and laughter spilled out. Keely didn’t wait to be invited in because she knew she always belonged here. And that was a gift, too.

The moment she stepped inside, she yelled, “Bestie!” and charged for Ellie.

I stood frozen, watching it play out. My daughter flew at Ellie, pigtails streaming behind her.

Ellie grinned widely, her pale green eyes lighting at the sight of my daughter, her dog dancing at her feet.

She’d changed from what she’d worn earlier, and it was so much worse—maybe even more torturous than that damn pegacorn T-shirt with no pants.

She wore a pleated plaid skirt in burnt oranges and browns that hit her at mid-thigh, paired with tights with artful little tears that revealed tan skin.

I wanted to slip my hand up that skirt and tear the stockings right off.

But I’d want her to keep the heeled boots on.

They weren’t exactly cowboy boots, but they were close, and with the white turtleneck sweater revealing a sliver of taut skin at her navel, it was like she’d blended New York and Sparrow Falls into something uniquely her.

Someone knocked into me from the side, offering a beer. “You’re drooling.”

I glared at Kye, taking the bottle and returning my gaze to my girls just as Ellie caught Keely. She spun her around, and Keely giggled as Gremlin barked.

My girls.

It was dangerous to even think the words, but I couldn’t stop myself. Because it felt…right.

“Looks like those two have bonded,” Kye murmured, amusement in his tone .

“Don’t start,” I growled.

His lips twitched beneath his dark stubble, and the action made the tattoos on his neck flutter. “What did I say?”

“You know exactly what.”

“I can’t notice that your neighbor gets along great with your daughter and that you can’t take your eyes off her?”

I tore my gaze from Ellie, but it hurt. Like ripping off something that had been superglued.

Kye laughed. “Dude, you are so totally fucked.”

“Language, Kyler,” Nora clipped as she walked up.

He grimaced. “Sorry.”

Nora sent him a quelling look and pulled me into a hug. “Missed you. You’ve been working too hard.”

I hugged her back. “Sorry, Mom. Things should slow down now that we’re getting past tourist season.”

She pulled back but kept a hold of my biceps, studying me like only a mother could. “You know you don’t have to apologize. I just worry about you.”

“What he needs is a night out on the town,” Lolli called from her spot at the kitchen island, where she drank some sort of colorful cocktail with an umbrella.

“Lolls,” I warned.

“What?” she asked, her voice full of innocence. “I can’t suggest that my grandson should let loose? You know, I’ve been working on something that could help with that. It’s a special blend?—”

“You lost me at special ,” I said.

Rhodes laughed from her spot on the couch, where she sat next to Anson. “Lolli’s turning all the ladies into special brownie fiends. Two of her girls from yoga came into Bloom yesterday asking if I stocked any of the good stuff.”

Fallon struggled to keep her composure. “I can’t wait for next week’s class. Everyone’s really going for that downward dog pose. They’ll probably start barking.”

Nora pinned Lolli with a hard stare. “See what your influence is causing? ”

“I’ll try your special blend,” Keely piped in helpfully.

I sent Lolli a glare that should’ve had her cowering. Instead, she just laughed and moved to Keely and Ellie. “How about you help me come up with a concept for Ellie’s diamond painting? I need to make her one now that she’s in her new house.”

“Like that’s any less corrupting,” Shep muttered, taking a pull from his beer.

Thea smacked his chest from her perch on the arm of his chair. “I love our diamond art.”

Shep stared up at her for a long moment. “It’s penis pumpkins. We have penis pumpkins in the greenhouse.”

“I really prefer the term dick gourds,” Kye said, popping a sliced red pepper with some dip into his mouth. “It’s more dignified.”

Fallon gaped at him. “Seriously?”

“What’s wrong with dick gourds?” Kye asked.

“It’s better than puck penises,” Linc said, handing Arden a plate as he lowered himself to sit next to her on the hearth in front of the fireplace.

“I think you mean your stick dick,” Kye corrected.

I lifted a hand to squeeze the bridge of my nose. “Someone save me.”

“What’s a stick dick?” Keely singsonged.

“I hate all of you,” I grumbled.

“Daddy,” Keely said very seriously. “We don’t use the H-word.”

“That’s my girl,” Lolli praised. “No H-words. But there’s nothing wrong with a little phallic expression. It opens up those sexual chakras.”

Ellie struggled not to laugh as she set Keely down. “Do I want to know what a sexual chakra is?”

“Oh, darling, we’ll work on it. It’s your sacral chakra. A little of my psychedelic tea, and we’ll get you opened right up. Then we’ll hit up the cowboy bar or The Sagebrush.”

“Lolli,” I gritted out. Though it wasn’t only because I didn’t want my six-year-old going into school tomorrow talking about stick dicks and sexual chakras. It was also because I was jealous. The idea of Ellie letting loose with someone who wasn’t me…had everything in me twisting into knots.

“Just because you’re a stick-in-the-mud doesn’t mean the rest of us have to be,” Lolli shot back.

Ellie just shook her head. “I don’t know if I could keep up with you, Lolli.”

“Trust me,” Fallon called. “You can’t.”

“But you’ll have a hell of a lot of fun trying,” Lolli said, shaking her hips in some bizarre dance.

My cell phone rang, and I’d never been so happy for an interruption. Pulling it from my pocket, I saw Gabriel’s name on the screen and swiped my finger across the device to accept the call. “Please, save me from the insanity that is my family.”

Gabriel was quiet for a moment, and everything in me went on alert. “What’s wrong?” I asked, moving out of the open living space and down the hall.

Gabriel cleared his throat. “It’s your dad. We’ve got him in lockup.”