Page 30 of Ashes of Us

The rest of the dinner with Alex passed with Danica bringing him up to date on what Maverick had found out the night of the memorial about Jasper's alleged infidelity. When she mentioned that Jimmy said Jasper still had his jeans on, Alex leaned back in the booth, looking pensive.

“The question after that is, were they undone?”

Danica shrugged. “Heather didn't say, just that Jimmy mentioned that his pants were still on and in his opinion, Jasper was too high to have sex.”

“Eh.” Alex shrugged dismissively. “I'm not saying he was or wasn't, but it's been my experience that weed tends to, ah, enhance, the pleasure.” He coughed a little, and Danica saw a faint flush rise up his neck.

“But it also depends on what type of weed they smoked.

Certain types have different effects, and that's important because there are types that make you super relaxed and sleepy.”

Danica put her chin in her hand as she listened, trying to follow his train of thought. “So, what? You think she assaulted him?” A flash of pure rage went through her, and she suddenly wanted to hunt Lucy down and make her disappear.

Alex shook his head. “Let's not jump to conclusions, but if he were super high and fell asleep after having sex, he wouldn't have put his jeans back on, trust me.” He fiddled with his napkin for a moment, looking like he was deep in thought.

“But we know Lucy was pregnant, it's on record at the hospital that she suffered a miscarriage because of the car accident, and if we believe it was Jasper's, they didn't have to have sex for her to get pregnant.”

Danica furrowed her brow and let out a groan of frustration and disgust. “Are you saying they were dry humping, he ejaculated and managed to get her pregnant through his underwear, jeans and her clothes? That's a little far-fetched, don't you think?”

“Ah!” Alex sat up, looking quite pleased with himself. “Since Jasper was shirtless and Lucy was in just her bra and panties, we can assume they were at the very least fooling around.” He paused, his smug expression fading as he looked at her. “Sorry, just keep in mind this is all hypothetical.”

Danica shook her head, letting out a deep sigh. “No, it's okay. As much as I want to stay blissfully ignorant, the facts all point to him cheating, and even Emilia and Xavier pointed out that Jasper wouldn't have picked her up if nothing happened between them.”

“Right.” He hesitated for a moment, then reached out and placed his hand on hers. “I'm really sorry, Dani, I can't even begin to comprehend how gut-wrenching it is to know you'll never be able to confront him and get his side of things.”

Danica smiled sadly. He was the first person to openly acknowledge that the lack of closure on Jasper's side was really messing with her emotions and mental state.

“Thanks. Like I said, there's a lot of back and forth between anger and sadness.” He patted her hand gently, and Danica pulled it back after a second, running it awkwardly through her hair.

“Continue with your theory.” She encouraged him, not wanting him to feel self-conscious about the physical contact.

“Well.” He paused, clearly trying to figure out how to word things. “What if she gave him a hand job, collected the cum and...” he waved his hand in a circle, wrinkling his nose in distaste.

“Oh, god, gross.” Danica recoiled in disgust. “You think she - ugh, that's so gross and underhanded.” She swallowed the bile that rose in her throat.

After a minute to let her shock and disgust fade a little, she had to admit, she'd heard of woman doing similar things before and since Lucy had the nerve to approach her in the hospital and ask for Jasper's sperm to impregnate herself, while claiming she lost their baby in the accident, she wouldn't put it past her to do it.

“Do you lose your memory when you're high?”

Alex shook his head. “It's not the same as alcohol; weed doesn't cause blackouts or amnesia. Long-term chronic use can mess with your short-term memory, but for an occasional user like Jasper, it wouldn't have an effect.”

“Jasper must have thought there was a chance if he met with her that night.” Danica pointed out. “Why else would he pick her up?”

“We don't know what she told him, though.” Alex countered. “You said the text's messages look like they were doctored.”

“They looked like some responses were deleted.” Danica corrected him. “Like the conversations were all disjointed and had context missing. He admitted in the texts that he slept with her.”

“And yet you don't believe he did.” Alex leaned forward, staring at her intently. “Come on Dani, you wouldn't be struggling with this so much if you thought he screwed her. You'd have walked away and washed your hands of the whole thing without a second thought. So why haven't you?”

“Because it's completely out of character for him.” Danica's response was immediate.

“I don't care how mad he was at me. Yes, he might have if he thought he was getting back at me, but he admitted in therapy he never actually believed I was cheating with Alexander.” She took a deep breath, picked up her napkin and began to shred it.

“He always hated my relationship with your family. He thought that your mom and dad saw me as a charity case or someone pathetic they pitied.” She mumbled, unable to meet his eyes.

“Well, that's just bullshit.” Alex folded his arms and shook his head. “Mom and Dad did what they did for you because they thought you were worth it, end of story.”

“I know they didn't see me that way,” Danica assured him.

“I think it was a combination of insecurity and resentment that I had other people in my corner besides him.

Like, if I left him, I would have a support system and wouldn't try to go back.” She paused, debating on telling him about Jasper's jealousy toward him and decided not to.

“If you asked anyone in his family, they would tell you he loved me more than life itself. None of them believe he cheated, except for Emilia and Xavier. And maybe I want to be in the dark.” She shrugged, watching her fingers carefully shred the napkin into similarly sized pieces.

“But I just can't wrap my head around him cheating on me.”

“Okay, but that just kind of backs up what I'm saying.” Alex insisted, reaching out and taking the napkin from her.” You said he threw her off him when he woke up and saw her lying on him in her bra and panties?”

“And threw up.” Danica nodded. She thought she could see where he was going with everything now, but as much as she desperately wanted to latch onto the idea that Lucy was lying, she couldn't quite bring herself to hold onto that hope.

“Look, I'm just saying, if the baby was Jasper's, there are other ways she could have gotten pregnant that didn't involve them having sex, and all of them are sneaky and underhanded on her part.” Alex sat back in the seat, looking proud and a little smug that he had made a valid point.

“No, no. You're right.” Danica agreed, chuckling dryly. “She could have done what you think.” Danica shuddered; it was too gross to think about. “That doesn't change the fact that they were alone for a few hours and were both half-naked on the couch, cuddling.”

“No, it doesn't.” Alex acknowledged, his face falling as she pointed out the flaw in the argument. “Maybe it was hot?”

Danica started to laugh, the fact that Alex was so valiantly trying to defend her husband's fidelity tickling her funny bone. “Oh wow. If Jasper knew you'd be the one defending him, he wouldn't have been so adamant that I quit working as your executive assistant.”

Alex frowned, annoyance flashing on his face. “What did I ever do to him that he wanted you to quit? I barely spoke to him!”

Danica waved the question off, still giggling. “He's been after me to quit for a long time, but it came out in therapy that he thought I should have left after I got the inheritance and done courses to become a licensed mechanic.”

“But you said you didn't want to be a mechanic.”

“No, I never have.” She acknowledged, surprised Alex remembered that conversation.

“But Jasper and I used to talk about opening our own restoration garage.

I always thought it was just a fantasy, something we'd say we wished we could do, and never took it seriously. He did. His parents offered us their house and land a few months ago, and he asked me if we could do it.”

“And you agreed.” Alex's face had settled back into its usual impassive state. “That's why you were leaving.”

“No.” Danica shook her head, not willing to let him think the conversation with Craig at their parents' house hadn't had an impact.

“I was leaving because I didn't want to work for someone who thought I would screw around with his father after everything his mother did for me. The clock I was waiting out was his parents moving into a senior’s village.”

“Right.” Alex was quiet for a long moment, looking at the table. “Do I need to apologize again?”

Danica shook her head, trying her best not to laugh again. “You really struggle with that, don't you?”

“I'm working on it.” He muttered, checking his watch. “We should probably head home. I have an early meeting with Kieran in the morning.”

Danica nodded, her heart sinking a little.

It was almost eleven, and she knew she was going to have to go home at some point, but she really didn't want to.

She began gathering her things, knowing the restaurant would charge their meals to the employee's account.

She could feel Alex's eyes on her, but she didn't look up.

“Dani?” His voice was soft and gentle, and she looked up at him in surprise. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah.” She stood up, and they started walking out of the restaurant.

“Sort of. I think I'm going to have to sell the house.” It was out, and she realized that while it was something she hadn't let herself think about, it had been sitting in the back of her brain since she saw Jasper lying in the hospital bed.

“Everything about it reminds me of Jasper, and I'm starting to dread being there.”

“You could just renovate,” Alex suggested as they reached the elevator and pressed the call button.

Danica scoffed, wrinkling her nose. The thought of going through a lengthy renovation process after she and Jasper spent all the time and money to make the house perfect for them made her feel weird.

She didn't want to erase her life with him. She just wanted to step away from it.

“Nah, that just sounds like a hassle. I'd rather start fresh.”