Page 9 of A Taste of Grace
A Sign
After I checked my home security system to make sure that Grace and the girls were secure, I walked to my Lexus and settled into the driver’s seat, taking Aunt Nita’s advice to breathe in and out to calm myself.
There was no way this side of heaven a woman that perfect dropped on my doorstep without God having something to do with it. Grace’s sexy ass was exactly my type. Her chestnut-colored eyes, pretty white teeth, and hourglass-shape made me want to release a nut with each step she took.
It wasn’t even that she wore seductive clothes. In fact, she was the opposite with modest attire, subtle makeup, and classic beauty that hinted at an untold story. She was observant, not too loud but gentle and demure with a nurturing spirit that my babies sucked up like water in a sponge.
When she sat on the floor with my kids like she was their peer, I smiled hard.
They climbed on her and touched her hair and body, violating normal boundaries, yet Grace didn’t flinch.
She listened to them and made them feel as if their words mattered.
The quiet attention she gave them opened them up to her so quickly that I was shocked.
Aunt Nita was right. I had no reason to worry about my girls’ well-being around her.
Was she from the South? Her faint accent hinted at a polish I hadn’t heard since my graduate school days at Emory. A woman that educated stuck out like a sore thumb in Farmerton. Why was she babysitting my kids?
I didn’t see a wedding ring, so I assumed she wasn’t married. If she did have a man, he was stupid to let her stay at my house on a Friday night. Maybe I should have thought about that before I nearly undressed her with my eyes.
I’d heard of love at first sight, but I had never experienced it.
The second I opened the door, I was mesmerized, stuck, yet I didn’t dare show it.
I was on a tight schedule and didn’t have time to process all that.
What I knew was Grace’s intense stares and probing eyes had me feeling like a horny teenager.
I could tell she was aroused too. Sweet Lord, her aroma was sweet and spicy. Even now, my mouth watered as I imagined what it would be like to kiss her shiny lips and bring her to a place of ecstasy she probably only dreamed about.
Calm down, playboy. Does she even know the Lord? You can’t be in these streets pursuing a woman who isn’t of the faith .
I gripped my steering wheel for another couple of minutes before starting the ignition. In a semi-haze, I turned on my lights and pulled away. As was my habit when I was alone, I talked to God out loud.
“She does kind of look like their terrible drawing, though.” I chuckled. “And the girls adored her.”
My girls could be little monsters with people they didn’t like. Grace came in like a magician and calmed them all the way down.
At times, I was too soft with them, so it was different being on the other end of their admiration. Grace was definitely their favorite tonight, and I was what? Jealous? I didn’t know. I shrugged and continued my conversation with my Creator.
“Thanks for looking out for my heartbeats and for me. You showed out big today.” I raised one hand in praise and tapped the steering wheel hard, pleased that my God brought little pockets of joy my way in unexpected ways.
“She’s exquisite, Heavenly Father. I know you hate lust, but could I be honest?” I shook my head and smacked my lips as I made a right turn at a stop sign and picked up speed on the four-lane highway.
“Her body, Lord, that body that You created…Sir…her hips and behind were so…” I thought back to the dark denim culottes Grace wore.
“And them doggone titties…full and round how I like them. I bet her nipples taste like honey too.” I shook my head and screamed like my favorite team made a winning touchdown.
“Hol’ up, hol’ up.” I shook my head and tapped the steering wheel again. “You know how disciplined I’ve been, so please give me grace. Amazing Grace, that is.” I laughed at my joke.
One thing I believed in was keeping it real with God. Once I got serious about my faith, I talked to Him like he was my big brother. It may not have been conventional, but it kept me real. That was why the young people could relate to me, even calling me Pastor C.
My mind wandered about Grace. One of my prayer requests was to find a woman who cherished my daughters. She already passed the first test, so I needed to learn more.
Since I was still twenty minutes from my destination, I called Aunt Nita through my car’s Bluetooth. She answered on the first ring.
“Hey, Auntie.”
“Hey, baby. Is everything okay with Grace and the girls?”
“Yes, she’s great. But I’ve got some questions for you.”
“Shoot.”
“About Grace…” My voice trailed off as I searched for the right words. “Is she married?”
Aunt Nita laughed.
“Has she opened your nose already, sweetheart?”
I sucked in a quick breath, knowing Aunt Nita had a special gift of seeing through any bull I threw her way. I sometimes hated that she knew me so well.
“Well…”
“I told you I wouldn’t steer you wrong.”
“So is she married?”
“No.”
“Does she have children?”
“No.”
“Is she looking for a husband?”
Aunt Nita cackled like an old hen.
“You don’t waste any time, do you?”
When her chuckles died down, she continued.
“I can’t speak for Grace, but based on my observations and conversations, I believe she might be receptive if the right person courted her. She’s not a hit it and quit it kind of woman, if you get my drift. She needs to be handled with care.”
Oh, really?
“Good to know.”
“Why is she in Farmerton?”
A shrill voice in the background traveled through my speakers, causing me to turn my speaker volume down.
“Caleb, dear, Callie needs me, so let’s connect later. You hear from God clearly, so let Him lead you in the direction your heart is taking you. Trust yourself, baby. Gotta go.”
I drove the rest of the way in silence, thinking about Aunt Nita’s words. I let my mind wander to the possibilities.
What would it be like to have someone that amazing around my girls and me every day? Something was different about Grace… in a good way.
My job as a pastor would take me away from my girls when they needed me most. Grace could provide consistent support to them in my absence.
Although I’d never want to take advantage of her time and use her without proper compensation, she had the missing pieces of what I needed in my life right now.
By the time I pulled into the banquet hall’s crowded parking lot, I knew what I had to do. I would have a conversation with Grace to learn about her goals and what she wanted in the future. I checked myself out in my driver’s side vanity mirror before exiting.
Couples dressed in formal attire walked hand in hand to the brightly led venue where strands of LED lights covered the entrance.
Several of them waved or shouted kind greetings to me.
Most of them had been married for years and prospered in their relationships.
Despite my gratitude for life and my elevated status, a slight twinge of jealousy and sadness tugged at me.
I wanted someone on my arm too. Grace was the first person who came to mind as I said a silent prayer.
Search my heart, God. You know what I need. And you know my past. Give me clarity about what I’m feeling and the right words to say when I see Grace again.
The second I entered the main hall, I felt like a piece of prime meat at a butcher shop. A lot of these undercover hoes salivated like they had rabies. Some of them even gawked at me despite being on the arms of their partners.
Since I’d become the senior pastor of Haven of Hope and Blessings, the level of interest in me changed.
There was always someone with a “special” request, but the church freaks were definitely on the prowl.
Call it game knowing game. The freakiest ones weren’t shy about seeking me out.
Over the past week, I had a pair of used thong panties mailed to my work office, a nighttime pop-up visit to my home by a naked woman in a trench coat, and a $10,000 “donation” from one of my widows to service her needs since she no longer had a man in the house.
When I told Aunt Nita this, she encouraged me to start my courting process immediately. My stronghold was lust, and both of us knew I was bound to fall into temptation if I didn’t get a handle on women’s objectification of me.
On my way to my seat near the front of the room, Roxanne Bolz, a former church member and lover, jumped in front of me.
“Hey, Caleb,” she lowered her voice. “I need to talk with you for a second.”
I looked around the room then back at Roxanne. I figured she was up to no good, but I wasn’t going to make a scene in public.
“What’s up?” I kept my voice steady despite my irritation.
Her black-lined eyes traveled straight to my crotch.
“Hopefully, that good dick you used to sling my way.”
I sighed, pissed but not surprised that my former ways would come back to haunt me so soon after I stepped into my new role.
“Senior pastoring looks good on you, by the way.” She licked her wet lips and rested her long mahogany nails on my tuxedo’s lapel, checking me out like we were at the club down the street.
I plastered a smile on my face and quickly darted my eyes across the room to see if anyone was watching our awkward exchange. When I realized no one was paying attention to us, I stepped closer to her and spoke through clenched teeth.
“Don’t mess with me, Roxanne. I may be holy on the outside, but I know how to take heifers down if I need to. For the last time, I don’t whore around anymore. What we had is over.” I took a step back and focused on her eyes.
Roxanne tilted her fit body forward, offering me a scandalous peek at the bountiful blessings underneath her dress that used to overflow in my mouth during our raunchy sex sessions.
Her floral perfume wafted to my nostrils, making me want to sneeze.
I sucked in a big breath and quickly swiped my finger under my nose to filter out the overpowering smell.
Nothing about Roxanne tempted me anymore.
“Do you do house calls, Pastor?” She batted her long eyelashes like she had debris in them.
This messy hoe was dense and unrelenting. Despite that, I wasn’t in the business of breaking people’s spirits, no matter how annoying they were. I reached for Roxanne’s wrist and removed it from my person as gently as I could without making a scene.
“I’ll direct you to our prayer team for that. It’s led by my Aunt Nita. Remember her? I’d hate for her to have to rebuke you in Jesus’ Name.”
Roxanne frowned, her face reddening. She poked her long red fingernail into my shirt.
“That hag better stay away from me. You’re a damn wolf hiding behind a pulpit. Nothing about your rotten ass is holy. You could learn a lot from your daddy. He never turned away a woman in need.” Roxanne’s shoulders drooped when she mentioned my father.
I know. That was the problem.
My father and I both had Roxanne. I wasn’t proud of that, but I didn’t know he was cheating on my mother at the time.
Madeline had just left me, and I was lonely.
Roxanne filled the bill by cooking hot meals for the girls and me.
One night, she popped up with a tuna casserole after Hannah and Esther were asleep.
It started with an innocent kiss but ended with her sucking me off so good my toes curled.
I became addicted to her and didn’t care how reckless I was.
We fooled around about six months, but one day, the Holy Spirit tugged at my heart.
I woke up realizing that if Roxanne ever got pregnant by my father or me, it would take the entire ministry down.
That was when my sorry behind got right with God.
Everyone involved in that fiasco deserved better, most definitely my mother.
I still hadn’t shared with her how much of a dog I was during that dark season of my life.
“I may not be like my father, but I promise I strive every day to be like my heavenly Father.” I lifted my hand toward the ceiling and raised my eyes, indicating that I now answered to a power much higher than anyone else. “The only clit I’ll suck from now on will be my wife’s.”
“Yeah, right.” Roxanne had the nerve to shoot me a bird and scurry off.
As much as I criticized my father’s adulterous ways, the apple didn’t fall too far from the tree.
My whoring started at Morehouse College.
I was so bad that the ladies called me Sir DickALot.
I threw my penis into any vagina that opened for me.
I temporarily got on the straight and narrow when a pregnancy scare almost made me a daddy at twenty.
I considered that my warning to take my relationship with God seriously until I messed around with Roxanne.
How was I going to make it through this senior pastor life when mess like this kept happening?
I needed a wife.
My mind went back to Grace. Maybe God saw what was before me and brought her to me so I wouldn’t fall again.
Who was she, and what did she need from me?