Page 9 of A Curse On Black Lake (Black Lake Gothic Cowboys #1)

Chapter seven

Eliana

I can’t move.

I’ve been sitting on her remade bed for an hour and I can’t move.

It’s time to lay her to rest, but the moment I go to the church, that means she’s really gone. She’s not out in the garden, she’s not in town, and she’s not visiting her friend, Ruth, down the street. She’s left me here on this Earth, alone.

I’m alone.

Not alone, never alone. The Spirits whisper.

I ignore them because it’s not the same, and they know it.

Grams always kept me away from that edge.

When the Spirits talk to me, it’s easy to let go into the other side, to lose my footing in this reality.

But Grams held me tight and kept me from stepping over.

I almost fell when they first came, but she kept me grounded.

Now that I’m on my own, I’m afraid that edge will disappear, and I’ll step over without even noticing.

It feels like the world should have stopped.

Mine did. Time no longer seems to matter.

Life feels all too fleeting. She’s gone, I’m still here, and I couldn’t follow.

Now I’m stuck in this deep in-between of trying to figure out what living means anymore.

How do I move forward? Will I ever be able to move forward?

Taking a deep breath, I force my grief ridden body to my feet and go say goodbye.

I’m late, but I don’t expect many people to be here.

They want to avoid me. But I thought people in this town would at least pay respects to her.

She helped a lot of neighbors, even if it was for a simple cold or delivering a baby.

She didn’t care who you were or what you did.

If you needed help, she would do it without judgement.

There were times when people who had always been mean to us, called us witches, but would come in for a fever remedy, or another woman I knew from grade school was pregnant and needed help with nausea. I asked Grams why she would serve people who were always so nasty to us.

She looked at me and said, ‘Child, if I don’t help them, then I am just like them. Who am I to deny someone in need? There may come a day when you need help. Would you want someone to tell you no because you were mean to them?’

I wonder if those people will be here today. She didn’t have to help them, but she did, and that speaks to the woman that she was.

Stepping through the open doors of the small chapel, I see Ruth off to the side with Pastor Beckett, and the funeral director in the corner wearing a suit that doesn’t fit him right.

He sees me. “Is there anything I can get you?” he asks.

I shake my head, staring at her casket.

“Have—” I cut myself off and cough to clear my throat. “Have there been others here?” I ask him.

“A few have filtered through, and then Ms. Ruth and Pastor over there,” he says and points to them.

She deserved so much more.

“Okay, thank you.”

He dips his chin and goes back to his corner as I walk up to her simple casket. She’s in the pretty dress she always loved. She said my grandfather fell for her when she wore it to a dance in town. But now she gets to be with him. Maybe they’re dancing now.

My knees buckle and I drop into the front row pew and stare at her, as tears silently fall down my face. I’m going to miss you, Grams.

“Ms. Greer?” The funeral attendant puts a light hand on my shoulder, pulling me out of my trance.

I shake my head. The Spirits were running wild, and I didn’t have the strength to tell them to shut it.

I glance out the window, and the sun has begun to set. Grams was adamant that all of this happen in one day.

“We will meet you at the graveyard in about twenty minutes,” he says.

In my funeral procession of one, I walk down the street to the graveyard at the edge of town.

The sun and the rising moon cast a grey light over me.

It’s hard to tell if it’s the town or maybe my mood.

I suppose it could be both. With every step I take towards the graveyard, it feels like my feet grow heavier, and I’m beginning to sink into the mud from my dream, only there’s no mysterious cowboy to help me out.

I’m on my own, sinking into the pits of my grief, drowning in the solitary bayou.

Grams had already picked out where she wanted to be buried, next to her husband and kids, my parents.

It’s the only open stone casket around, so I go over and sit on the ground to wait, ignoring the singular chair placed next to the open cement box.

Somehow it feels more depressing to sit in it.

A shiver rolls down my spine as I stare at the cement casket built to fit hers.

The water table is so high because of the lake, the dead have to be buried in crypts big and small above ground.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see something and force myself not to look.

I can feel them here. Ghosts are real, and they aren’t these floating corporeal creatures.

They are a different kind of spirit, not like the ones in my head.

They’re angry — restless. They aren’t here to help anyone.

I was taught to ignore them because they invite bad things to surround you.

There are some things in this world you should never mess with, and ghosts are one of them.

The hearse — well, the horse-drawn carriage — pulls up to the graveside, and the gravedigger, funeral director, and Pastor Beckett hoist her coffin off the carriage and set it on the stand that lowers it into the cement box.

I stay seated, staring at it as Pastor Beckett says a prayer over her. Exactly as she wanted. When he finishes, he squats next to me and clasps my shoulder. “I’m sorry Eliana, she will be dearly missed. Let me know if you need anything. My door is always open.”

“Thanks, Pastor Beckett.”

He smiles sadly and leaves me.

I nod to the funeral director, and they lower her casket into the small crypt. When he’s done, the only gravedigger in town, Malakai, waits on the other edge. “Are you sure you don’t want me to wait, Ms. Eliana? I’m happy to,” he says.

I glance up at his dark face and shake my head. “Grams wouldn’t want you to wait around for me. Go ahead. But I’m going to stay here if you don’t mind.”

“Take as long as you need,” he says.

The sound of dirt hitting the wood slaps my ears and thunders in my bones. She wanted dirt in there with her. She told me from dirt we came, to dirt we shall return, even if it’s above water.

Laying her to rest brings an edge of guilt slicing through me because a part of me is happy she isn’t struggling to live anymore. But the other part, that dark hidden fragment, is angry. It doesn’t matter if I knew this day would come, but it never makes it easier to say goodbye.

Malakai finishes, and I stare at the slight hump of black dirt before he moves the cement lid to seal her in there. The sound thuds, making me short of breath as a sob crawls up my throat, echoing into the darkening sky.

I’m frozen once again.

Something moves in my periphery, and I astutely ignore it. Grams would want me to go home because I’m giving these ghosts, the demons lurking, an easy target. But I can’t find it in myself to care. I’m not ready to walk away.

I see a small figure, and glance up. She’s a child. I know she’s not living, but she looks like she is. She doesn’t say a word, looking between me and my grandma.

Grams’ words keep rolling through my head.

Help him. He needs you to set us free.

All will be made well when you find it within each other.

She knows the truth now, Eliana. She learned what you must do. You must find him. You will save this land. The Spirits say.

I groan to myself and look up again. The little girl is gone. But there’s a man standing at a grave up on the hill. The outline is tall, large and his head is outlined with a cowboy hat. I stare at him wide-eyed. Just like my dream.

He doesn’t seem to notice me, so I stay still. Staring at him, not sure if he’s real or a ghost. He kneels down in front of two stone caskets and pulls his hat off before bowing his head.

The Spirits are in a frenzy, and I can’t make out what they’re saying, so my eyes remain on the possible ghost as he… prays. I don’t see ghosts often, but I’ve never seen them pray.

Eventually, he gets to his feet, sets his hat on his head and turns from the grave. He’s too far away to make out distinct features, but he catches me, and I freeze. He stares at me for a moment and then walks away back down the hill, disappearing from sight.