Page 54 of A Curse On Black Lake (Black Lake Gothic Cowboys #1)

Her hand slips around to the front of my face and tips my chin up. Her sad eyes say everything I need to know. The sun is setting, and the warm golden glow from the window above the sink casts a halo around her, like an angel. My angel.

“You hurt me, Killian. I know your entire world exploded in seconds, and I am so, so sorry that it did. But I’m not the one who did it.”

“I know,” I rasp, my throat tightening.

“I’m scared to let you in. I was starting to get used to the idea,” she whispers.

My neck twinges as I look up at her. “As you should. But I made a mistake. If you …” I swallow thickly, my heart trips at the thought of her not allowing me back in, but I have to try.

“If you don’t want this anymore, I understand.

But I’ll still be there for you. I’m still going to be here to help you with your garden, and get it put back together. I’ll do whatever you need me to do.”

“You’ll leave me if I ask you to?”

I grit my teeth, forcing myself to dip my chin. I’ll sleep on her couch if I have to. I won’t leave her alone, but I won’t come near her if that’s what she wants.

“No, you won’t,” she says.

She knows me too well.

“You’ll say yes, but you’ll always be hovering.”

I don’t respond, and a brow hikes up on her beautiful face.

“I understand it might take you some time. But I can be a patient man.”

“Why? You hardly know me even after all the time we’ve spent together,” she says.

I scoff, and my hands have a mind of their own as they rub the back of her calves.

“I could say the same, but I’d be lying because you do know me. And you might not want to hear this, but I know plenty. I know you have a heart of gold, hiding behind a wall so thick your Grams could barely get past it.”

She inhales sharply, and I lean forward, kissing her stomach through her dress.

“I know you want someone to rely on.” I kiss her left hip.

“I know you push people away so they can’t reject you first.” I kiss her right hip.

“I know you’re incredibly messy, but I don’t mind picking up after you.” I grab her left hand and kiss her palm.

“I know you’re intelligent, but you keep that side of yourself quiet.” I take her right hand and kiss that palm.

“I know you saw right through me the moment I picked you up out of that ditch.” I wrap a hand around the back of her thigh and lift her leg up. The fabric of her dress falls back, and I kiss the inside of her knee before putting her foot back on the floor.

“I know you have a gift, and I don’t think it’s weird. I think it’s amazing. I think you’re amazing,” I rasp and do the same thing to her other knee.

“I know, Eliana, that you are the most wonderful woman I’ve ever met, and I would happily drop to my knees to tell you thank you every chance I get if you let me back in.” Even if I don’t deserve it, even if I’m scared of the consequences.

Her eyes blink rapidly, and my stomach lurches. For a moment I thought the Spirits had grabbed her, yanking her from me, but her eyes are clear. She’s trying not to cry.

My knees ache against the floor, but I stay where I am, waiting with bated breath for her to say yes, no, anything.

“Push me away again, and I’ll never let you near me to see what you’ve done,” she says.

“It won’t happen again,” I tell her sternly, and I mean it. I won’t betray her trust ever again.

“My Grams taught me that it was better to forgive than carry around the weight of a grudge.”

I frown thinking about how she’s done exactly that, exacting her revenge on people in this town by making them think she is as bad as they assume she is.

The corner of her mouth tips up. “I didn’t say I listened. But in this case I will. I’m done with carrying bitterness for people who don’t understand me because they’ve never stopped to try. So why would I carry resentment for someone begging me to let them in?”

“Really?”

“Stand up,” she says.

I get to my feet and lean forward, caging her in. “Any other self-respecting woman would tell you to go stick it where the sun don’t shine. But for some reason I can’t get myself to say that to you. Probably because you’ve pushed your way under my skin, and I like your grouchy ass way too much.”

I grin and lift her onto the counter, pushing my hips between her knees.

She rests her head against the cabinet door behind her.

“Can I kiss you now?” I ask her.

Her brow tips up again, and I want to kiss it. Her attitude makes my skin feel hot and my blood roar.

“Please?” I ask her. “I’ll get on my knees again,” I offer.

Her lips split into a wide smile, and she shakes her head.

“I’m not sure you deserve to,” she says.

“Fair enough,” I mumble and take a step back.

“You can hug me though. I need one of those,” she says.

My knees go weak, and I wrap the back of my hand around her neck and the other at her spine, holding her tightly. Her arms squeeze around me, and the anxiety of losing her washes away, but the desire to make her fully mine fills my veins. My lips find her temple, and she leans into my neck.

“I’m so overwhelmed and confused. I’m numb. What am I going to do?” she asks.

I pull back to look her in the eye. “We’ll figure it out. I’ll help you get some plants back in the ground, and maybe we can trim back the others that were damaged. They can grow back, right?”

“Yeah, but they likely won’t grow back fast enough to produce anything. And my flowers…” she cuts off and her breath stutters before she bursts into a sob again.

“I’m sorry, darlin’. But the flowers will grow again. I’ll make sure of it.”

She huffs in my neck. “Do you have a secret recipe for making things grow faster?”

“Um, I think manure works,” I mumble into her hair.

“Smart ass,” she mumbles.

“You can call me whatever you want as long as I get to be with you.”

I rub my hand up and down her spine, and her body slowly relaxes.

God brought us together for a reason. There is no other explanation. The hits keep coming, but together we can weather the storm.

“I’m sorry, Killian,” Eliana says against my skin.

“Why are you sorry?” I ask her.

“You were lied to your entire life, and you can’t ask why.”

I let her go, running a hand through my hair. “I’m angry, but what’s the point? I’m hurt, but that doesn’t make sense either. Yet, I don’t blame them for not telling me because in the scheme of things it doesn’t actually matter.” I pause, taking a breath.

“Though I have to admit, one of the strangest parts of all of this is my great-grandmother is the one that put the curse on this town. My grandfather, the one who died. It’s … too coincidental to be ignored.”

“And my grandmother was the one that helped deliver your great grandpa. Yeah, that’s no coincidence,” she says.

“We’re no further ahead than when we started,” I mutter.

“Yeah, but we are further behind,” Eliana says, giving me a sarcastic smile.

She scoots off the counter and grabs her water, drinking the glass dry. She opens her mouth, and then the color bleeds from her face. The cup drops onto the table and rolls off the edge. I catch it before it shatters on the floor, and she groans, pressing her hands to her head.

I snatch her up before her knees hit the ground and carry her into the living room. “What’s wrong?” I ask, trying to keep my voice calm, but I can hear my own panic.

“Baby talk to me. Is it the Spirits? A headache?” I ask her while I check every part of her body. Maybe she hurt herself when she got home, and she’s only feeling it now? Maybe a snake bit her? I know all of those options are wrong, but I have to do something.

She shakes her head, her eyes squeezed shut. “Please,” she cries.

“Please stop, I hear you, please,” she says.

Realizing it’s the only thing I can do, I grab her hand, and she grips it as hard as she can. She’s in pain, and I have to watch her suffer. If I could take it away I would, but she asked me not to do the only thing I can think of.

Eventually, she stops crying, begging the Spirits to stop while her head rests on my lap. I drag my fingers through her hair until her body finally relaxes.

Her beautiful eyes open, and she looks up at me. “Did they stop?” I ask her.

She nods and takes a deep breath. “They weren’t trying to hurt me. It was all a lot at one time, more were … there, I guess is the best way to put it.”

“Does that happen often?” I ask.

“No, it’s happened only a handful of times, when they first came to me, a couple times over the years, and then now.”

“Do you know why?”

Her eyes close while I play with her silky white hair. “No, I don’t know why, but I’m sure it’s a terrible reason. They haven’t said anything clearly, but I did pick up on what they kept repeating.”

I wait for her to say it, but she obviously doesn’t want to.

“You can tell me.”

Her eyes open, full of fear, and my mouth goes dry.

“He walks in darkness.”

“What the hell does that mean?” I ask.

“See? I have no idea, and it’s best we don’t look too deeply into it. Sometimes they can scream things, and it can be absolutely nothing.”

Exhaustion covers her face, and I help her sit up. “I’ll get you some water.”

“No, it’s okay.”

“Eliana, please.”

She rolls her eyes and gets up to fill her glass with water. She looks out the window, and even though it’s dark, we can see the destruction of the garden.

“We’ll get it all fixed up,” I tell her, sliding my arm around her shoulders. She leans into my side. “I think I want to stay here tonight.”

I frown because that’s not a good idea, but also we’d have to get up extra early to get back to the ranch.

Her body tenses under my arm, and I drop it. “Sorry, um, yeah, we can sleep here if you want.”

She shakes her head.

“What?”

She takes another drink of water.

“He’s here,” she says so quietly her lips barely move.

“What?” I ask.

“He’s here,” she says again.