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“He made me talk. I hated it, but I went every week to make my mom feel better. After a while, it got easier. He helped me through my feelings about Rose’s death and about my father. But I never told him what really happened. I couldn’t. I couldn’t tell anyone. Everyone assumed that Rose came in through an unlocked door and stabbed me while I was sleeping...and I just let them continue to think that. It seemed easier.” His body tensed. “It was a coward’s way out.”
“But there must have been signs at the scene. The condom and-”
“Apparently, Rose had some sort of feelings for me, some guilt. There was no condom and my dick was in my pants. No one ever assumed that it was anything but an attack on me while I was asleep. A revenge hit against my father. You’re the only person who knows. I couldn’t even tell Sam.” His voice trailed off in a husky whisper.
Her heart ached for him, her soul needing to somehow comfort him. Pulling her hand from his, she turned his face to hers, forcing him to meet her eyes. “Listen to me. You were attacked when you were young and vulnerable. You have no reason to feel guilty or ashamed. Not one bit of it was your fault. I understand why you have trust issues. I understand why you panicked the other night.” She saw doubt in his eyes and it pissed her off. “But know this...you survived and grew into a gorgeous, sexy, brilliant, successful man in spite of the fact that you got a raw deal when you were younger. You’re the most incredible man I’ve ever known. Do you understand me!?” Her statement was fierce and her eyes were shooting fire. Damn it, he needed to get it through his thick head that he was someone special.
His eyes grew warmer and his lips twitched. “Yeah. I got it. Can we go back to the sexy part?”
She rolled her eyes. Trust Simon to focus in on only the sex part of her statement.
“Is that the only part you heard?” she replied, exasperated.
“No. But it was the most interesting part.” He grinned at her unashamedly.
Frustrated, she scooped up a handful of water and dropped it on his head. “I’m trying to explain something to you here.”
He grabbed her wrist and pulled her back into his body, creating a ripple in the tub that had water lapping against their skin in a gentle caress. Eyes heated and intense, he speared her with a look that spoke of possession, desire that ran much deeper than lust. “Do you want to know what I understand?”
She shivered as his arms slid tightly around her body, anchoring her against him. Unable to speak, she nodded.
His voice low and raspy, he answered, “I understand that I have to be the luckiest bastard on the planet because you love me, you accept me. Hell, I think you almost understand me-which is a fucking miracle because sometimes I don’t even understand myself. I don’t really know how to romance you like I should, but it isn’t because I don’t want to. I just don’t know how. I understand that before I met you I was living in a very small world, and somehow you dragged me into the light, made me look around and actually see things that I never saw before. I understand that you make me a better man.” He snaked a hand around her neck and planted a fierce, possessive kiss on her lips. Pulling away abruptly, he cupped her chin, his eyes molten and fierce. “Is that enoughunderstandingfor you?”
Breathless, she peered at him with her heart in her eyes. Maybe he hadn’t repeated exactly what she had been trying to convey, but it was a start. He was learning to be loved. Burying her face against his shoulder, she murmured against his skin, “It’s enough. For now.”
“I need you, Kara. Don’t leave me again.” His voice hoarse, he rubbed his face against her hair.
He hadn’t told her that he loved her, but he had bared his soul, shared his secrets, made incredible leaps in sharing his emotions. And he had done it for her. So yeah, for now, it was more than enough. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Damn right you’re not!” he growled.
She smiled, because even as he spoke the demanding words, he was rocking her in his arms, holding her like a tender lover. He was wrong about not knowing how to romance her. He showed her how much he cared in so many little ways that were mind-boggling, seductive, and addictive. It was like a missing piece of her soul had finally found her and clicked into place, making her feel complete.
“Did you love her?” She knew she should drop the subject, but she wanted to know.
“Who?”
“Rose? Did you love her?”
“No.” His low voice answered quickly and without hesitation. “I cared about her as a friend and I had a gigantic crush on her. But I didn’t love her. I didn’t want her to die. The sad part of the whole thing is that she died for nothing. A few days after she killed herself, the whole organization was brought down by the authorities. The boss and everyone associated with the cartel are going to rot in jail.”
She could hear the sincerity, the acceptance of the whole situation in his voice. He wasn’t angry, wasn’t bitter. “Good therapist?”
“Yeah. Dr. Evans was the best. We still have dinner occasionally. I think he’s still trying to figure me out.” He laughed with genuine humor.
She smirked against his shoulder. “You’re a fascinating subject.”
“Are you saying that I’m odd?” he growled against her neck.
“Hmmm...I’m not sure.” She slid away from him and stood, hating to leave the circle of his arms, but dying for something to drink. She’d been in the steamy room for quite some time and she was parched. Unable to resist looking back at him as she climbed the steps, her hungry eyes roamed his muscular body and handsome face. “I think I need to study you a bit more before I come to any conclusions.”
He came to his feet in one graceful motion, muscles flexing, a wicked grin on his face. “Sweetheart, if you keep flashing that sexy body at me, I’m going to be doing my own studying.” His grin widened and his eyes grew dark as he prowled after her, his big body cutting through the water easily. “And I examine and test my data very thoroughly.”
She scooped up a towel from a pile next to the tub and scrambled out the bathroom door, Simon hot on her trail. Laughing as he caught her around the waist before she could make it out the bedroom door, she squealed, “No. I’m thirsty.”
As he pulled her back against his wet, solid chest, she wondered if she really needed water all that badly. God, he felt good. Melting back against him, she could feel his hard, insistent arousal against her ass.
“Are you thirsty?” His voice changed, instantly concerned. “Did you eat?” He took the towel from her hands and started to wipe her body gently, drying her back and turning her around to blot the moisture from her breasts and belly.